Lines in the Clouds
by Birchbud
Summary: Sesshomaru, curious about this 'Tokyo', forces a terrified Kagome to take him to her era. What happens when one innocent well allows two individuals to leap over time's barriers?
1. Chapter 1

_I don't own 'Inuyasha' or its characters. I'm not profiting off of this story.  
Enjoy!_

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It wasn't her smell that he first noticed. Kagome's scent--although _off_ in terms of what humans should smell like--was smothered by the thick stench of blood. Inuyasha's blood, to be precise.

Sesshomaru slashed ruthlessly at the clumsy Hanyou. An hour of battle without interruption had allowed Sesshomaru to steadily chip away at Inuyasha's flesh. The fight began at sundown; Sesshomaru had descended on a cloud and demanded Tetsaiga. Inuyasha naturally refused, and a fight ensued.

They were all in a clearing: Sango, Miroku, Kagome, Shippo, Inuyasha, and now Sesshomaru. Tendrils of dying sunlight brushed softly against the horizon, outlining swaying trees around the edge of the valley. Dark grass swished around their feet, like a black ocean. A few stars hung in the evening sky, mirroring white pockets of firefly light among clumps of grass.

Silver swords flashed erratically above the heads of Inuyasha's frightened party. Miroku clutched his hand in frustration, knowing that a wind tunnel would suck up both demons. Sango held Shippo with both hands--her boomerang had quickly been snapped clean in half by Sesshomaru's claws. She had stopped trying to shield Shippo's eyes. All of them were huddled together, close enough to feel hot air slide off flying blades. All except for Kagome.

She was returning to the clearing with quick, straight-backed strides. A bulky item lay concealed in the pocket of her cotton sweater. She marched straight past Miroku's outstretched arms. She ignored Shippo's pleas for comfort; she didn't even meet Sango's confused eyes.

The demons slashing madly at one another paid no attention to the girl. Inuyasha's breath was ragged; he could taste blood in his throat. His left ankle was badly injured--he was moving half as fast as usual. Sesshomaru had sustained a few shallow cuts along the lengths of his arms, as well as a somewhat deeper gash across the front of his shin. It was obvious that Inuyasha's death was clawing forwards with every clean stroke of Sesshomaru's sword.

Kagome knew this. She withdrew the gun from the folds of her sweater and shakily aimed it at Sesshomaru's dancing body.

'_It's either this, or he dies for sure.'_ she thought, as she steadied her sweaty grip on the firearm.

The silence of the field was filled with heavy breathing, clashing metal, and swishing of silky fabrics. Kagome cleared her throat.

"Sesshomaru!" She yelled as loudly as she could. The pain she caused the demon's sensitive ears pushed him to turn and face her. His white form was suddenly as still as the half-visible moon staring at the scene unfolding below.

Kagome pulled the trigger. _That_ was what caught his attention.

* * *

_A/N: Thanks for reading_


	2. Chapter 2

The sound of the device was worse than anything he'd ever heard before. He felt as if something had crawled inside his punctured ears and rested there, ringing. The smell of it hit him soon after: it was abrasive and suffocating. Inuyasha had stopped moving and was staring at the female. She was sweaty and shivering, eyes wide in shock. Inuyasha's gaze fell on the item in her hand, then shifted to a tree not a foot to Sesshomaru's right. There was a hole, about the width of his finger, straight through its sturdy trunk.

Sesshomaru followed Inuyasha's eyes to the tree, then back to the girl. He picked out her different clothing, her odd scent, and her strangely coloured hair. He noted the weapon in her white-knuckled grip, still leaking gray puffs of smoke. In the blink of an eye he dropped Tensaiga, snatched Tetsusaiga from Inuyasha's slack hand, bounded towards Kagome, grabbed her roughly by an arm, and flew away in a streak of smooth hair and flowing fabric. Inuyasha cried out and chased them, but his ankle soon gave out and he was left a bloody heap on the meadow's floor. Miroku and Sango ran to his aid. Kagome held tight to the gun in her hand as Sesshomaru maneuvered her to his front and crushed her against his chest. He allowed a small smile to tug at his lips. He had won.

Kagome was more frightened than she'd ever been in her life. Attempting to shoot Sesshomaru wasn't the smartest thing she'd ever done. A month before she'd managed to attain a handgun--'just in case'. Years of sleeping in the Feudal Era had instilled in her anxieties that nothing could alleviate. She'd started waking up in damp, tangled sheets with screams dying in her throat. She'd taken to storing the gun in her backpack--more for emotional security than practical use. After using up all of her arrows missing their blurred forms she ran a kilometer to their abandoned campsite to fetch the firearm. Determined to do _something _she'd taken one of the biggest risks of her life. Too bad she missed.

Sesshomaru betrayed none of his thoughts. His grip was impersonal. The moon's streaky shadows flowed across his still features. His narrowed eyes were following on the route before them. Below them sat a straight nose and a tightly clenched jaw. His hair rippled in the wind like a white river, trailing a silvery stream behind their path.

Kagome shivered. The wind hitting them was cold, crisp autumn air, on its way to winter. All traces of the sun had disappeared. It seemed that the stars were the only steady things in her view; fields dotted with strips of forests rolled under their feet.

"Where are we going?" She ventured to ask.

He didn't answer; instead he landed abruptly. He still held her tightly to his amour. Kagome stiffened—the top of her head was _touching_ his chin. He was going to kill her. He stood still for a moment, perhaps to intimidate her, and then removed his arm from across her body. He held her by the shoulder and stepped back a pace.

Cold eyes surveyed her form before settling on the gun still in her grip. Before she could cock the trigger it was ripped out her hands.

"Do not move." He ordered. Kagome nodded jerkily.

Sesshomaru imitated Kagome's earlier stance with the gun, aiming it straight at the girl. The crickets sang in between her crooked breaths.

'_I don't want to die.'_ She'd faced death countless times before, yet every time the same feelings washed over her. A hot swell of longing rose in her chest. She wanted to hear birds singing, sadly and sweetly. She wanted to feel a sunrise warm her naked body. She wanted to hold a grandchild. She wanted all of life, and now it was too late. Perhaps she was just selfish.

Sesshomaru awkwardly pulled the trigger. Nothing happened; he hadn't cocked the pistol.

Kagome started crying. Ugly, raspy sobs leaked from her little body as she broke down before her executioner. _'Inuyasha, I'm sorry_.' Without her he'd have to appeal to Kikyo to find the shards. And _momma_, maybe she'd never get the news and would spend eternity waiting for her daughter to come back home. Kagome's mind filtered through all the consequences of her impending death, and she grew even more upset. Her eyes darted around the little clearing for an escape route. Black fuzz started creeping around the borders of her vision; she felt would faint soon. In a moment of desperation she concentrated on her miko powers, picturing a pile of white chalk dust where Sesshomaru stood, staring. Her energy didn't bound to her rescue this time. For a second she wished that she'd spent a few years training with Kaede instead of being the impulsive girl that she was.

Sesshomaru calmly tucked the weapon into one of the folds of his clothing. His robes billowed around him in the breeze like haunting, white silk arms reaching for her frightened form. Once again, he looked at her. His eyes trailed from her red-streaked hair, to her puffy eyes, to her small frame clad in a sweater and jeans. Kagome braced for death.

"Name." His tone dripped authority.

Kagome blinked and struggled to compose herself. "Higurashi, Kagome."

"Race?"

Kagome tucked her hair behind an ear, a nervous habit. She sniffled loudly. "Um…"

Sesshomaru impatiently shifted his feet. It was a small movement, but seemed powerful in comparison to his usual frozen demeanor. "Human?" He asked.

She bit her lip, and was just about to answer, "Or course" when he flashed in and out of space and she felt a sting on her check. A drop of blood rolled lazily down her tanned skin. Sesshomaru set his eyes on the shallow wound for a few seconds as he made a show of wiping the minute amount of blood off of his claws.

"Human, then. Origin?"

Her mind was drawing blanks. She clenched her hands into fists, angry at feeling incompetent in front of the Youkai. "I don't come from around here."

He stepped heavily towards her, reached out a long arm, and elegantly grasped a handful of her hair. "Your hair is odd. Why?"

Kagome swallowed awkwardly and mustered up her courage. "Why do you want to know?"

"I am curious." Sesshomaru stated without pause.

"Oh." She hadn't been expecting that. "I… um… dyed it."

He withdrew his hand abruptly. "You killed it?"

Kagome would have giggled had she not been terrified of the creature before her. "Where I come from, people mix chemicals together. We put the chemicals on our hair for a while, and then take them off. The chemicals—while they're on the hairs—they change the colour."

"Where do you come from?"

He _is_ curious, Kagome thought. "Far."

Sesshomaru shifted again. "I didn't ask how _far_, human. I asked _where_. Or are you too stupid to understand my question?"

"I am NOT stupid! I'm from Tokyo."

Sesshomaru withdrew the gun, and then roughly seized her upper arm. "You will take me to Tokyo," He whispered. "You will explain this-" he waved the gun in front of her, "And I may not kill you. North or South?"

Kagome shrunk back from him, quite ineffectively. She turned her face towards the stars and judged the necessary direction. "North."

He leapt away, dragging her in his wake.

* * *

The well sat there arrogantly.

'_Stupid well.'_

It lay still. '_Probably playing innocent, the jerk.'_

Sesshomaru tugged her arm roughly. She was going to develop bruises, yet a large part of her was aware that he was being gentle. His claws weren't puncturing her skin, and all of her bones were still intact. He'd deliberately kept her alive.

A bird chirped in a nearby tree, joined soon by others to form a pre-dawn chorus. She had tried every delay tactic in the book to keep him occupied while she attempted to form a coherent escape plan. Nothing yet. And now, after pretending to be lost numerous times, she'd run out of ideas. Maybe the threat of death gripping her numb appendage had something to do with it.

"It's… um… down the well."

She feel see him calculating how honest she was being. The rickety, vine-coated structure didn't seem like a realistic place to hide a city.

"If it is not, you will die." He stated matter-of-factly. That was what unnerved her about him: he was so calculated. He was farther from human that she'd thought possible. She knew that he'd have no guilt about killing her. He'd probably sigh in boredom, and then gracefully wipe her unworthy blood off of his porcelain claws.

"You just go down and you end up in Tokyo."

He marched—glided, more like---towards the well. He seemed to move slowly; perhaps in order to allow her time to change her mind. As her feet stomped overtop compact dirt she was struck with inspiration. _'The well will not let him through. Only I will go…'_ She could escape this alive, if only she jumped down first. She waited until they arrived at the rim. Then, as he stared critically into the abyss, she glanced over his shoulder, widened her eyes, and belted out convincingly: "Inuyasha!"

Sesshomaru twirled around and, just for a moment, relinquished his grip. Kagome had barely enough time to throw herself headfirst down the black hole's throat. By the time Sesshomaru realized her trick the well had swallowed her whole.

Without hesitation he perched like a bird on the lip and hopped into the darkness.

* * *

Kagome opened her eyes and saw an aged wooden ladder. It had never looked so beautiful. She applauded her cleverness and let out the breath she'd been holding for the past few hours. She craved a shower and a good cry on her mother's shoulder, but above all she wanted to crawl in between bedcovers and sleep off her emotions. Her whole ordeal hardly seemed real. She hastily yanked off her sweater to reveal bruises spanning the entire length of her arm. She lightly touched a half-formed hand mark, pale purple in the dim light. She shivered, suddenly cold.

YOUKAI

The aura of a strong demon barreled into her without warning. She stiffened against a warm body behind her. A large, white hand rose in front of her vision before delicately tracing spider-webbed veins on a particularly nasty mark.

"Hello, Higurashi."

His tone of voice was no longer measured. He let down his guard, and he was _mad._

His claw pierced her skin. She bit down on her tongue, forcing herself not to cry out at the shallow gash. He suddenly withdrew his hand and stepped back.

"I smell…" He trailed off, perplexed. It was an odd expression on such a confident creature. "I smell smoke. Sick smoke… like a tainted fire." He was talking more to himself than to her. "Humans. Hundreds…" He fixed his intense stare onto Kagome's quivering body. She smiled weakly.

"Welcome to Tokyo."

Sesshomaru's robes brushed against her in the darkness. "Show me this land."

Kagome's breath hitched. "Um…" God, what now? Sesshomaru. In Tokyo.

Some things just didn't mix well together.

"Show me, Higurashi."

"Do you think I could sleep, Sesshomaru? Sir? Mr—"

"—Sesshomaru."

"Okay. Sesshomaru, I have a lot to explain. But…" She was so weary of humoring the Youkai. She just wanted a clear head to evaluate the situation. She wondered if she should continue to appease him. She'd tried to physically run away a few hours before. That didn't work. She'd even attacked him with her bare fists in a moment of desperation. That _really_ hadn't worked. What could she do? Her powers had such a long way to go…

"But?" He clipped.

For a being that was borderline immortal he was very impatient with certain things. Kagome felt around blindly for her sweater. "But can I sleep first? Humans are frail, you know." Her sweater was shoved into her arms. A pair of yellow eyes glowed in the darkness.

"Your functioning is impaired?"

She straightened out her shirt and grasped a wooden rung. "Yes."

Now that she was home she felt some of her confidence filled her. "I'm sore, and really tired. If I don't sleep I'll get sick and you won't have anyone to explain this world to you." Her stomach rolled over as Sesshomaru lifted her to his chest. He bolted out of the well and through the shrine door, and then set her down gently on the grass.

"World?"

"There's a lot to tell…" Kagome started the hike to her house. She felt slightly secure with the knowledge that he _needed_ her to fulfill his curiosity. All the panic, tears, and anger had taken their toll on her. She was bordering on 'so-tired-I-don't-care' mode.

Sesshomaru trailed after her shadow like a ghost, breathing hot air down her neck. It was nearly sunrise: she could see a thin strip red light painted onto the bottom of clouds suspended near the horizon. Souta would wake up for school in a few hours. '_What is Inuyasha doing?_'

"You will explain this world to me."

Kagome opened the front door. Familiar smells greeted her, and she nearly laughed in relief. She was home. She was safe. Sesshomaru lingered on the doorstep, waiting. "You will sleep." He commanded. "Then you will show me this place. You will explain the well and the weapon, and answer any other questions I have."

Kagome briefly wondered if he would kill her tomorrow. It seemed too far away to worry about; too surreal to contemplate. Sesshomaru was staring into the dwelling.

Politeness triumphed over common-sense. Kagome motioned to her home. "You can come in, if you'd like."

Sesshomaru blandly announced, "I will stay here for you."

Kagome bit her lip, unsure of how to breach the subject. "This place is very different from where you come from. Can you wait until I talk to you before you explore?"

"Do you think me impatient?"

Kagome forced herself not to reply to his rhetorical question. "I will be out before noon."

Sesshomaru's eyes never left her until she shut the door. Even long after she departed he stared at house; either deep in thought, or not thinking at all. By the time golden beams leveled off and illuminated his form, he was seated calmly beneath a tree, waiting.


	3. Chapter 3

Her arms hurt. She was sore all over, but by far her left arm was the worst. She'd been awake for an hour, trying to get back to sleep. She adjusted her limbs uncomfortably and further tangled the blankets. The afternoon sun poked through the slats in her blinds and irritated the girl splayed haphazardly across pink covers. Kagome thought of Sesshomaru for the thousandth time that morning. She'd peeked out her window upon awakening to see him sitting with his back to a tree. He had looked calm—perhaps he was meditating. For the millionth time she cursed the well for allowing him through. She hadn't quite figured out why he was able to follow her. Anyways, he could wait a while longer while she slept in.

Unfortunately that wasn't going well. She winced in pain after applying too much pressure to a bruise. Finally she threw back her blankets in a frustration huff and rushed downstairs to greet her family.

Her mother was cooking lunch with leveled, steady hands. Her grandpa sat at the table impatiently, muttering under his breath. Souta dropped his backpack and rushed over to her. The scene was so _normal_ that she wanted to laugh. The sounds and smells of food sizzling brought her back to years before, when she didn't have on foot on deaths doorway and the other planted knee-deep in her dreams. Souta's age—god she envied him. He embraced her enthusiastically. "Kagome!"

She gasped at the pressure on her injuries, drawing her mother's attention. She swooped around Kagome with little sympathetic noises, then took her hand and yanked up her sleeves. She frowned and ripped Kagome's sweater clean of her body. The girl was left wearing in a thin undershirt.

"Mamma, I'm f—"

"—Kagome! My baby what happened? I'm going to close that well, I swear. It's going to be boarded up. You poor arms! What happened?"

A thousand 'I told you so's' ran through Kagome's mind. A gun… god, she was so stupid! "I fell." She hated to worry her mother, but it was a lame lie.

"Don't you lie to me Kagome!" Her mother placed her hands on her slim hips. For a small woman she could be very domineering.

Kagome snuck a peek out the kitchen window. Sesshomaru couldn't be seen from that angle. She sat down beside her grandfather, who was acting suspiciously quiet. He alternated between frowning at her arms and picking angrily at a ball of rice. Souta glanced at the clock and hopped from foot to foot.

"Mom? Do I have to go back to school?"

His mother took a break from fawning over Kagome to reply, "Yes."

"But why? Kagome's never home."

Guilt stabbed at Kagome's heart. She wished that her little brother knew her better. She really hadn't been home that often in the past few years. The race for the shards was more intense than ever before; she simply couldn't risk leaving Inuyasha's side.

"Souta, go!" Kagome knew what her mother was doing: trying to maintain a sense of normality. School, cooking, routine: few things could distract the family from Kagome's adventures. Returning home with dreadful injuries over the years had revealed to them how dangerous her life was.

"Bye Kagome." Souta rushed out the door.

Kagome ran after him. "Be right back mom! I just have to get my pack—I left it in the shrine." She ran away from her mother's protestations and towards the demon resting in her front yard. It was too dangerous having Sesshomaru here with her family. Souta's silhouette was winding down the path.

Sesshomaru was like a statue beneath the fan of copper leaves. He sat cross-legged, with his broad back leaning against the gnarled trunk. Dappled, golden sunlight wove its way in between tree branches and over curled blades of grass. A few red leaves spiraled like crippled birds around Kagome's form. She stopped a few yards ahead of him, unsure as of how to treat the demon.

"Good morning, Higurashi." His eyes matched the sun's yellow shadow staining his perfect skin.

Kagome tentatively sat down in front of him and wrapped her arms around her knees. Wispy swirls of frozen smoke curled out from under her breath. Sesshomaru looked over her arms, laced heavily with bruises.

"Humans _are_ fragile." He mused.

Kagome overlooked his obvious lack of remorse. She was very aware that he was perfectly capable of killing her.

"Sesshomaru?" He didn't respond. He only stared evenly at her, devoid of expression. "Why don't we decide what we're going to do here?"

"You will teach me of this place."

Kagome huffed in annoyance. "I mean—am I a prisoner?"

Sesshomaru wrinkled his nose. "No. I would not imprison _you_. You will be a guide."

Kagome stood up angrily. She was sick of his arrogance! She looked down at his still form: a mass of creamy silk piled at her feet topped long, pale hair wrapping itself around the wind. "One should not insult his host." She lectured.

Sesshomaru paused. He always seemed slow and measured in his movements; Kagome stood the complete opposite. He rose up, as if it was an effortless action and the air itself moved his form. "It was not an insult. It is fact. Learn the difference."

Kagome stomped her foot. "Now _that_ was an insult!"

"Yes. It was."

A frustrated noise escaped her pursed lips and hung in the air between them. "Why?" she ground out.

"Why what?"

Kagome suspected that he knew very well _what_, and simply found enjoyment in aggravating her. "Why should I be your damn guide?"

Sesshomaru felt another wave of nausea take hold of him again, though it weren't nearly as bad as they were a few hours ago. He'd learned—in all his years of training—that if something irritates you, eliminate it. If that is not an option, learn to accept it. The smell of this place (wherever it was) was beyond description. No, he could describe it: worse than an unwashed servant, yet not as harsh as the aftermath of a battle. He'd spent all night sitting down taking deep breaths of foul air and filtering its information away. There was water nearby. Metal as well. People—hundreds, if not thousands. A human city, the largest he'd ever encountered. The girl was true to her word.

"Hello? Earth to Sesshomaru?" Kagome waved her hands in his face.

"I am aware that you exist." She didn't detect the sarcasm in his tone.

"Good. Now, since you're here I'd better start from the beginning." She shivered again. "Can we go inside?"

Sesshomaru's nod was barely perceptible, but she latched onto it and dragged him into her heated, comfortable home.

Her mother hovered anxiously near the doorway. "Kagome, you've brought a friend! Why, I thought that you were Inuyasha at first. You two certainly bear a striking resemblance. Come inside and have some tea—but first I must talk to my daughter, if you'll excuse us. Or do you know how she got those dreadful bruises?"

Sesshomaru stood stiffly in the foyer, uncomfortable with the woman's intrusiveness.

The two women gazed up at him with big, brown eyes, and waited for his response. Kagome was trying to discreetly mouth "no" to him, which he found quite confusing. Unless…

"She fell, Ms. Higurashi."

Kagome stifled a giggle. Her mother sighed and led them both into the kitchen. An old man popped up in front of his vision with a cry of "Demon!" The woman apologetically led the man away, not before shooting Kagome a 'we'll-talk-about-this-later' look and smiling politely to Sesshomaru. They were left alone.

Kagome momentarily pitied the demon standing perplexed before her. '_Now, what would be the easiest way to teach him?' _

"I assume you can read," she stated. Sesshomaru nodded.

Kagome flew upstairs and back in a matter of seconds. She dumped an armful of glossy textbooks on the kitchen table. Sesshomaru picked one up and idly flipped through it.

"You have a high status, then." He squinted aristocratically at the pages. "Some sort of royalty?"

Kagome blushed and shook her head. "No. We're middle-class." She read his confused face. "Peasants." She simplified.

His eyebrows furrowed and he took in the rich furnishings. "You own books. I am not stupid—you are no peasant." He closed the book with a snap and set it on the table warily. He suspected sorcery.

"You'll understand once I explain everything. Do you understand this?" She shoved another open book under his nose.

He recognized most of the words. Still, the sentences seemed off somehow, as if the words were forced together and ended up piled in too-short sentences. It was awkward to read, but bearable. There were many new words too: 'democracy', 'globalization', 'anthropology'. "Yes. I can read this. World history from the sixteenth century: a brief summary of events."

It was anything but brief. Sesshomaru read for five and a half hours. Kagome discovered that (in addition to the definitions she had to supply for his history lesson) he badly required a crash-course in science. 'No, the Earth is not flat.' 'You are made up of atoms.' 'Electricity is not magic.' He had so many questions! She spent hours fidgeting across from him. Occasionally she'd down a glass of water or put the kettle on. Sesshomaru, it turned out, was an avid tea drinker. Throughout those pauses he was absolutely silent. Any attempts at small-talk on Kagome's part were met with a raised eyebrow or sarcastic response. By early evening Sesshomaru had his royal elbows on the table and was focusing all of his attention on the last few pages of the book. He'd gotten the hang of the sentence structure and turned out to be a very fast reader. If the future shocked him, he didn't show it. Perhaps he didn't fully believe her.

"That is all?" Sesshomaru shut the book and placed it gently on the tabletop.

"Not nearly. It's the basic outline, though, of why things are the way they are. So do you get it? The well transports people back and forth in time. I don't know how, or why; I've always suspected it's because fate's chosen us to carry out missions. Like, if there's a mistake in the past someone from now is elected to go back and fix it. But—" Kagome realized that she was rambling and cut herself off, blushing in embarrassment. She fingered the tablecloth absentmindedly while thinking of the Demon seated across from her, memorizing every nook and cranny of her kitchen with observant eyes. It was unnerving. "Any questions?"

Sesshomaru dragged his eyes away from a clock and focused them on the books piled haphazardly in between abandoned teacups and empty water glasses. The future. He hadn't really thought about it before. What good would _supposing_ do when you'd live it? But his knowledge was still murky, and it irritated him to no end. This girl was more educated than he! Insulting, really. He did have one question tugging at him, though. "Where are all of the demons?"

Kagome blinked and though about how to phrase the painful answer. She decided not to sugar-coat the truth. "I suspect that they're either in hiding, or dead."

Sesshomaru's aura flared in anger, then forcibly calmed. Kagome was used to it by now. She used to feel his energy constantly pressing against her; it now seemed more of a background buzz. He stood up and silently walked out of the kitchen, straight through the front door.

"Hey!" Kagome was through playing meek. That was downright rude! She scurried after him, fully intending to give him a piece of her mind.

She caught him standing still a few paces from her front step, long arms clasped behind his back. The shimmering sun hung low in the sky, brushing the busy Tokyo skyline. It was bright yellow against a crimson background, and seemed to waver and shifts like a mirage. His head was tilted up, towards the clouds that hung bloated with colour over their heads. They inched across the scorching sky, so slowly that at first glance they would seem still. If someone looked long enough, though, they would be ably to detect their sad, slow march towards the ends of the earth. Kagome paused at the scene: an albino demon framed in scarlet, pondering time's carelessness. _'Where are all the demons?_' She respectfully disappeared inside to clean the kitchen.

Two minutes later Sesshomaru wandered back into her home as if he had never walked out. Kagome was sprawled on a couch in the sitting room, looking utterly exhausted. Sesshomaru stopped at her side and hovered over her like a storm cloud.

"Sesshomaru, what do you _want?_"

He floated over to the adjunct couch and seated himself, arranging his voluminous clothing into a manageable heap at his side. He said nothing.

Kagome sighed in frustration, deflating until he thought the gaudy pillows would absorb her. "Why are you here?" She scratched out. "I've done all I can for you. The least you could return is an explanation." Her bruises ached.

Sesshomaru gazed evenly at the young woman beside him. Her feet flopped over the arm of the couch. Every once and a while she'd kick the air sitting above her toes. Her neck was tilted at an uncomfortable angle on top of the scratchy cushions. Her arms though—god they would be painful, especially for a human female. He could see the outlines of his hands superimposed on one another to form a black-and-blue collage. She was strong. That quality in her had earned a bit of respect from him. He concluded that she had been hospitable. An explanation wasn't an outrageous request. "I'm here because I followed you."

Kagome groaned. "No—I mean _why_, not _how_. Why were you so curious about me? What do you want me to do for you? What are your thoughts on these times?"

He answered in his straightforward, businesslike manner. "Your weapon obviously captured my attention, and your hair and clothing is different. I was curious about your position in my brother's party, as well as your origin. I wanted to learn more."

That was the longest string of word's she'd ever heard escape his lips. She pushed her luck. "Why do you want to know everything?"

Sesshomaru's still face lent no emotion to his next words. "I can't die. My life is dull."

Kagome nearly choked in surprise. What did that have to do with anything? "Of course you can die!" It wasn't the smartest thing to say, but then again Kagome wasn't well known for thinking before she spoke.

"I can't. I have duties." He took in her confused expression and abruptly decided that this conversation had gone deep enough. "You will never understand, human."

Kagome burned with anger at being classified as 'human' and nothing else. How could such an intelligent being hold such a shallow view of the world? "Well then, what do you want me to do now _demon_?"

Sesshomaru ignored her insult and didn't skip a beat. "Assist me. We are returning to my time."

"Why? For god sakes!" She was on the verge of frustrated tears. Her life always seemed to spin into chaos, and she was left alone watching threads of control slip through her fingers. How did she get herself into these messes?

"I'm going to stay here for a while. I wish to collect some personal assets."

Kagome's shocked silence gave way to a choked, "Stay where?"

Sesshomaru smiled, or perhaps it was just the evening light playing tricks on her eyes. "With you, of course."

Kagome started crying. Sesshomaru ignored her until she'd progressed into harsh, irregular sniffles.

"Are you finished?" He stood up and stared at her. His head nearly brushed the ceiling. Kagome nodded sulkily. He narrowed his eyes at her before stilling for a second and cocking his head slightly to the side. He then stretched out an arm towards her, palm up and heavy fingers unfurled. Kagome hesitantly placed her hand in his. His skin was warm and soft; her fingers were calloused and coated in slick sweat. She internally thanked him for not flinching.

"Do I have a choice?"

Sesshomaru said nothing: instead he pressed his palm against the small of her back and prodded her ahead.

Kagome crossed her arms reflexively before twitching in pain and quickly untangling her limbs. "I could find another guide for you. Someone more cooperative? I know some people would be honoured to—"

"Cease your rambling. You will accompany me." He pushed her forwards. She ground her heels into the floor.

"But why do I have to go with you now? Couldn't you get your stuff then come back?"

"I want you to accompany me." They were almost at the front door.

"_Why_?"

They were through the front door, hobbling down the steps. Her eyes darted around the landscape. Sesshomaru pushed her to stumble faster. "I do. There is still more to know."

Kagome's voice rose in panic. "You could borrow a book you know? Do you know what a library is? Or course you do. Well—"

Sesshomaru's withdrew his hand. Kagome sighed in relief—for all of two seconds. Before she could blink two white appendages shot towards her form and held her still by the waist. Sesshomaru swung around, bent down, and looked her in the eye.

He was perfect. He had skin like paper: all white and smooth and flawless. Every one of his thick, black eyelashes was an equal distance from the next. Red-rimmed eyelids dipped down to brush against his skin and then opened wide, revealing the most interesting eyes she'd ever seen. They were yellow, like Inuyasha's. Inuyasha's, though, held lines and flecks and layers of colour. They were yellow, yet human. Sesshomaru's irises were a pure, solid gold. They looked _too_ smooth, too painted on, and too bright. It was eerie.

Sesshomaru searched Higurashi's face. Her pores were visible, her neatly groomed eyebrow hairs grew in uneven patterns, and a small crack lined a dry section of her bottom lip. She was pretty, with her bright red-rimmed eyes and rosy skin; yet she was human. Pretty and human: a rare combination. He wondered--just for a second--what it would be like to be flawed. Then, remembering what he intended to do, he schooled his face into an angry expression and tightened his formerly gentle grip. "I am returning to my home. I have paperwork to finish. You will come with me."

He waited for waves of fear to slide off of her. And waited. He tightened his grip a little further. Not enough to bruise, but enough. Still no fear came from Kagome. In fact, she looked more confused than frightened. Her face was all scrunched up, as if a math equation stood in front of her instead of an irritated demon. Finally she spoke. "You do _paperwork?_"

Sesshomaru did something he hadn't done in a long, long, time. He rolled his eyes. "How else does one govern? My power extends beyond brute strength."

Kagome shrugged, all too aware of his hands resting on her sides and locking her in place. "I don't know. I've never thought of you as a leader. More of a wanderer."

His hands fell away as he straightened his stance, again a head taller than her. "You do not know Inuyasha's history?"

Kagome shivered in the evening chill. "Of course I know it!" She could feel Inuyasha's head in her lap, warm in firelight; she could feel his breath tickle her ear as he told her _everything_. He'd be in a hut right now, restrained by Miroku's insistence that he rest and heal. He'd worry for her. Kagome swelled with the urge to jog ahead to the well and find him.

Sesshomaru drew himself up and gathered his arms to his side, seeming somehow taller. His armor clinked as he squared his broad shoulders. "You know my history then, and you dare to believe that I would act like my brother and abandon _my_ father's lands? You think that I would shame his memory with an empty throne?" Red ink bled into his eyes. He gave Kagome a disgusted look, as if she were nothing more than a fat worm wriggling under his boot. "I have duties besides running off on wild adventures, searching for cheap thrills with human females. I am the eldest: a lord--more than a mere wanderer. You misjudge me greatly, human."

Kagome advanced angrily a step towards his stiff body. "Pardon me? _Cheap thrills with human females?_ And you say _I _know nothing!"

She had only enough time to draw one angry breath before it was knocked out of her. She had enough time to register Sesshomaru's arms encircling her waist in a crushing grip; enough time to realize that that was the wind whipping through her hair. Before she could beat her arms against him in protest they were beside the well. His warm limbs withdrew abruptly.

She really, really hated that well. When all of this ends--years from now when she'll have a family and a little house with peach walls--she'll return with a canister of gasoline. A video camera too, so that she'll watch the evil thing burn to death over and over again.

Sesshomaru's arm nudged the small of her back. He was standing too close to her, gazing towards the well with an excited expression on his face. It was the look he'd held right before striking at Inuyasha. Kagome shivered and tried to discreetly back away. Sesshomaru's head snapped around so fast it didn't seem attached. He stared at her, his face again blank. His fingers snaked around her side and dragged her to him, so tightly his amour pressed against her ribcage. At least he hadn't laid a finger on her arms.

"So, Higurashi, I simply jump in? No incantations?" His deep tones were controlled again.

Kagome took in a deep breath. The air smelled of old wood, dirt, decomposing foliage, and Sesshomaru. In the back of her mind she noted that she'd assigned him his own scent: a sort of dark, musky smell layered with fresh cloth. She glanced around the rickety shack, following swirling wooden pattern to the doorway. She pictured Souta standing there with a childish smile on his face. A few of his hairs would glow in the sunbeams as he'd lean his lanky frame against the doorway, and wait. She chided herself for not saying goodbye.

Sesshomaru tightened his grip. Kagome spoke in a choked whisper. "No incantations." She promised herself that she'd survive.

The demon dragged her through the dark and down, deep into the well.

* * *

The midnight breeze was blacker than usual. Gnarled tree branches scratched her face and shoulders as she wearily marched behind the white figure pushing away the darkness. There were no clouds or moon, only the navy air pressing against her heels. Above the musical_ swish_ of swaying leaves, Kagome's noisy bumbling over roots and dry twigs rang throughout the woods. Sesshomaru glided over the cold earth without sound.

Just for fun, Kagome pictured Inuyasha as a red blur dropping like a stone from the sky and killing Sesshomaru with one, swift blow. Only now Sesshomaru had Inuyasha's sword, didn't he? Was the gun still nestled in his robes? A flicker of relief warmed Kagome when she remembered that they didn't manufacture bullets in the feudal era. Then again, Sesshomaru didn't need guns to kill.

"Walk faster, human." The command drifted behind his long, elegant strides.

Kagome remembered that brief moment of equality they shared in her sitting room. It seemed a world away, as she struggled to increase her pace. He hadn't called her anything but 'human' since kidnapping her. He had, however, lent her a shirt. He'd seen her shivering earlier in her thin undershirt and had wordlessly removed his armor, stripped off a layer of clothing, then silently put his armor back on. When she looked at him confused he'd said, "You may die, and I would be without a guide. Cold kills humans. Put it on." His behavior was so perplexing…

"Did you not hear me? Walk faster."

Kagome's breathing progressed into harsh gulps of air. Her lungs seemed too small to function, yet too big for her aching chest. She could feel her heartbeat throb in her temples. Her arms were still numb with cold as she swung them in her clumsy march.

Sesshomaru halted. "Are you too tired to proceed?" He didn't even turn around to face her.

"I can proceed… just not very well. You're going too fast."

He pivoted around and leaned against a tree trunk. Kagome wondered why she noticed that his posture was excellent. "I am not going too fast. You are walking too slowly."

Kagome flailed her arms and made what could best be described as a 'frustrated grunt', much to Sesshomaru's amusement. "Why does everything have to be a contest? I get it. You're strong. Whoop-dee-doo. I'm human, okay? Deal with it!"

He dealt with it. Kagome was airborne within a nanosecond. She was chest-to-chest with Sesshomaru, with his strong arm crushing her lower back. She wrapped her long legs around his torso, her nervousness over gliding above the treetops overcoming her shyness. Her arms locked around his neck as she nestled her head into his shirt, right underneath his collarbone. She could feel the gun poking her thigh.

Sesshomaru felt the need to rationalize out loud their intimate position. "You're too weak to walk. A struggling human is easy prey, and I don't wish to kill some low-level demon over you. This method is much faster." He could feel Kagome nod in agreement. She must be exhausted if she didn't mind latching onto him. He absent-mindedly shifted his arm in order to make her more comfortable.

They flew for hours: past lakes, valleys, towns, and meadows. They cut through the cold air until birds chirped under their feet and the crest of day stained the far horizon pale blue. Kagome was asleep by then, but Sesshomaru watched watery red tones leak through the veil of night and light up the awakening world. He thought, as he did every morning, that this sunrise was like thousands he'd witnessed before it, and thousands yet to come. A day would come when he'd grow bored of them, much like everything else in his life. What would he live for then? He hoped that day would take it's time.

Kagome shifted in his arms. She was very light for her size. Perhaps that was common in all humans. She certainly wasn't as compact and muscular as the female demons he'd held. Her bones were probably weaker as well, riddled with holes. He pitied—just for a moment—the girl nestled in his hold, and all of her flaws.

By the time they landed the morning was in full bloom. His feet touched down on the brown grass softly. He wondered what would be the best way to wake Kagome up. Talk to her? Prod her? He should be professional about it. He grew frustrated at his own indecisiveness, all too aware that the girl in his arms seemed the source of uncomfortable feelings….

He dropped her. He was _not_ going to go all poetic over a human.

"Ow!" Kagome's morning didn't get off to a good start. "What was that for?" She scrambled up and let out a wide yawn. She then alternated between massaging her sore back awkwardly with one arm and rubbing sleep out of her eyes. It was way too early to think about manners.

"We have arrived."

That caught Kagome's attention almost as much as her rude awakening. She twirled around with wide eyes and tried to take in as much of her surroundings as she could. They were on a hill, with a blue river winding around the base. The shortly cut grass swirled around the base of a tall, stone building atop the small mountain. Its structure was rounded, with no balconies and only a few small, square windows. Turrets poked the clear sky. Sesshomaru started walking toward heavy, metal doors. Kagome scrambled to catch up. The doors sung open with a slow creak once they arrived before the giant building. She swallowed her nervousness and followed Sesshomaru inside.

Stone floors clicked beneath her heels. The cold walls were occasionally covered with a skillfully woven tapestry, or decorated with a painting of one of the surrounding valleys. Way up high in the rafters birds shuffled and watched the two people below with beady eyes. As they moved down the narrowly twisting corridors torchlight flickered over Sesshomaru's fine features. He really _was_ beautiful. Kagome forced her attention off of his face and onto the closed doors lining the walkway. She wondered what—if anything—lurked behind them. The castle seemed like a barren, lonely building. At one time it was filled with life; now it sat sadly on the hilltop like a great, abandoned church. Sesshomaru stopped before one of the doors and knocked heavily. The sound echoed throughout the empty hallways. Something noisily approached the door and swung it open.

The squat, green, bug-eyed toad wasn't the ugliest demon kagome'd ever seen, but it sure ranked in the top twenty. The bloated thing smiled up at Sesshomaru with pure adoration. "Sesshomaru!" Its voice was as rough as its pockmarked skin.

Sesshomaru nodded in acknowledgement. "Jaken. I trust you've kept my affairs in order." He pushed past the toad.

Jaken didn't respond to Sesshomaru. He was too occupied with the human female trailing in his lord's wake. A female smelling suspiciously of him. And wearing his outer shirt? The last time his master brought a female companion home, it hadn't ended well.

Kagome had learned long ago not to judge a book by its cover (or a demon by its face, for that matter). She bent down and smiled gently at the creature. "Hello Jaken! I'm Kagome, Sesshomaru's… guide." Jaken snorted at her friendly gesture and whisked into the room without an introduction. Kagome pursed her lips and followed him.

A fireplace stuck to one of the four walls lent warmth to the plush carpet. Rich red curtains with woven gold patterns were artfully arranged to frame a large, open window overlooking a courtyard. The few pieces of furniture were polished and adorned with carvings running along the dark wood. A desk and chair occupied a corner, next to stacks and stacked of yellowed parchment. Sesshomaru sat on before one such paper with a quill in one hand and bottle of ink in the other. He frowned at the document and shot an irritated glance at Jaken, who stood obediently by his side.

"Human food costs that much?"

Jaken fumbled in his rush to please his master. "Yes, yes! Prices are rising, you know—"

"—inflation." Sesshomaru interrupted. Kagome shot him a proud look from across the room.

"Well, whatever you call it, a pig doesn't cost what it used to. But it's good that your soldiers eat. They're strong men! Won't you reconsider hiring some demons though? They cost much less to take care of."

Sesshomaru tensed. Kagome felt his angry energy fill the room. "Jaken, what happened the last time a demon climbed too far up the ranks?"

Jaken swelled with pride at being able to supply an answer to Sesshomaru's sarcastic inquiry. "You dealt with the assassin well, my lord."

Sesshomaru shook his head and continued pawning over his papers. A few peaceful seconds passed, before Jaken's curiosity broke through his obedience. "Why is there a human girl here? Surely there are _demon_ females to satisfy you! Much more beautiful, graceful women!"

Sesshomaru reacted before Kagome even had time to process the words. Jaken was dangling out the window by a withered foot, his bloated body bursting with fear. "If I need _satisfaction_, you are not to pass judgments on my bedmates. This _human_, however, is not one of them." With those words Sesshomaru released his grip. Jaken disappeared from view, leaving behind a high-pitched squawk of terror. A belated moment passed, and then an audible 'thump' shook the floor. Sesshomaru calmly returned to his seat.

Kagome (although angered at the toad's insults) couldn't help but feel sorry for Jaken. "That wasn't necessary." She reprimanded.

Sesshomaru brushed off her words with a slight raise and shrug of his shoulders. She was growing better at reading his body language. "He will survive."

A few peaceful seconds passed. Then Kagome opened her big mouth. "Before we leave can I see Inuyasha?"

Sesshomaru formulated a sarcastic response.

Kagome clarified: "Just to tell him I'm alright. Alive, I mean."

Sesshomaru honestly didn't care whether or not his idiot half-brother worried over a girl. What was the last one that got him into trouble? Kikyo, that was her name. Awful lot like Higurashi, actually. Anyway, he didn't really care about Inuyasha's feelings. What he _did_ care about was the competence of his guide. Emotional distress injured humans, did it not? "You may speak to him briefly, but you will not leave my line of vision."

"And you won't kill him? He'll still be injured, you know. You hurt his ankle pretty badly."

"Why should I not kill him?" Sesshomaru's question wasn't lined with sarcasm. It held the genuine curiosity he'd displayed before.

"Why _should_ you?" Kagome was sensitive about this topic. Her first impression of Sesshomaru hadn't exactly been a good one, and she always held the picture of a ferocious four-legged giant warily in her mind when her thoughts strayed to his beautiful body. She needed to remind herself of what that body was capable of.

Sesshomaru slammed the quill on the desk and snatched up the message he was unsuccessfully trying to respond to (the Southern had lord requested a loan). "Inuyasha disgraced _my_ family name. I have full rights to his life."

Kagome put her hands on her hips, unconsciously mimicking her mother. "And how did he disgrace your family? Oh yeah—he had the audacity to be born!"

"That _hanyou_ ran off and left his duties to me!" Sesshomaru picked up a piece of paper thrust it stiffly towards her for emphasis. "That half-wit doesn't know how to collect taxes, or construct roads! And while he romps around trying to fulfill an impossible wish I'm left buried underneath our father's memory." Sesshomaru visibly calmed and forced himself to rifle through the papers, occasionally picking out an important piece to lay atop a new pile. "Your vision of Inuyasha is clouded by pity. Don't presume to lecture me on what you know little of."

"Of course I pity him." Kagome talked softly, attempting to calm the angered demon. "His mother died. He was all alone."

Sesshomaru clenched his jaw while deftly picking up the newly-constructed pile of parchment. "And mine didn't?"

Kagome faltered mouth-open at Sesshomaru's words. He'd never revealed so much of himself before.

Sesshomaru cut off the conversation then and there. He poked his white head out the window, papers in hand. "Jaken! I am departing. I will be gone for a month at the least." Kagome cringed. "I trust you to handle any minor disputes."

A weak, "Thank you Lord Sesshomaru" floated up to the window.

Sesshomaru walked past Kagome with a stiff, "Follow me."

They exited the castle. Once outside Sesshomaru carefully folded the papers and tucked them into his shirt, next to the gun. He stood in front of Kagome, then hesitated for a moment. He growled quietly at his own indecisiveness before scooping her up and gracefully and leaping into the wind.

Kagome swallowed nervously. "I'm sorry your mother died."

Sesshomaru's hair shone golden in the air, intermingling with hers in a sky lit dance. "I am sorry as well." He ground out. And then a softer, "Thank you for your condolences."

A few minutes passed. Their mode of transportation was markedly less awkward than in the beginning. "Where are we headed?" Kagome asked.

"You are going to visit my brother. I will not interfere." His tones rumbled in his chest; she could feel his voice against her cheek.

"Thank you."

They glided over patchy red and yellow treetops. Sesshomaru noticed that overtop rotting leaves and the approaching frost, Kagome smelled of salty oils, sweet blood, and magic. It wasn't an unpleasant scent, for a human. A corner of his mind thought of his perfect, ivory mother. She'd smelled of spring flowers. He wondered why he still remembered.

The girl in his arms fluttered her eyelashes and smiled contentedly, eyes closed against the wind. They were traveling fast. Far up ahead Sesshomaru's excellent vision picked up a small red figure limping around a human village. He planned to let the girl go earlier and allow her to walk part of the way. He'd sit in the treetops and not interfere, but observe. Perhaps his brother would deserve a beating after all.


	4. Chapter 4

Her smell still clung to his clothing. If he closed his eyes and pictured her face, then sorted slowly beneath all the layers of blood and grime and sweat, he could detect it. His Kagome.

Inuyasha had limped away from the hut he'd been confined to. He needed time alone—time to think, to heal. Time to mourn, for he was told that she was dead. Sesshomaru wasn't known to take hostages.

He seated himself atop a pile of crunchy leaves, as far from the village he could get without arousing suspicion. He then stared into nowhere and repeated three words in his mind: _'Kagome is dead'_. They felt _wrong_ to think or say, as if admitting she was gone would make it so. Miroku insisted that he'd have to accept her death and move on, and that monk was no stranger to heartbreak. So Inuyasha tried again.

'_Kagome is dead'_. He felt dirty, right down to his soul, for thinking that unthinkable thought.

"_You healed over Kikyo. Give it time, Inuyasha."_ Miroku's well-meaning words drifted through his sore head. But he hadn't healed over Kikyo, not really. There were still times when he caught shadows out of the corner of his eye and almost, just almost, believed for a second that it was her. Now he'd have two ghosts following him.

Only Kagome couldn't be dead. How could she be, when her scent sto;; lingered around him? He fingered a dead leaf in between in claws before crushing it. He watched the ragged remains filter through his fingers and land beside a few scattered blades of brown grass. An image of Kagome's smiling face swam in front of his eyes. It then faded into a skull, none of her left in the dry bones, and crumbled into dust. A gust of cool wind blew away the broken leaf, and Inuyasha suddenly felt sick to his stomach. He leaned over and thought he would vomit; yet nothing came out. He narrowed his tired, red-ringed eyes at the dirt beneath his feet and wondered how long she would have lived anyway.

She was there, running down a path towards him and the village. She was clad in a large white shirt, so beautiful with her black hair, kicking up colours. She smiled, all radiant and glowing like an angel. It wasn't real--it was Naraku. It was a ghost. It was Kikyo all over again. Then he was up on his feet and running on his broken ankle towards this beautiful illusion. He ran blindly, because it was _Kagome_.

She jumped into his arms and his ankle gave out. They both fell down laughing. She clung to his chest in the dirt and wished time would stop.

Inuyasha almost cried. He touched her, ran his fingers through her tangled hair, breathed in her life. She was alive; he was whole. "I thought you were dead."

"I'm not." Kagome pretended time didn't exist, and _almost_ forgot the Taiyoukai lurking in the dark.

Inuyasha ran his hand along her shirt. "Why didn't he kill you? Why're you in his shirt?" Hot dread clutched at Inuyasha's throat.

"I was cold and he gave it to me. He… he wants me to show him around Tokyo. Nothing sexual, don't worry. I'm human, remember?"

"Tokyo?" Inuyasha wished that Tetsusaiga sat on his hip. "We can't allow that."

Kagome shifted onto her side and rested her head on her arm. She watched him breathe, watched him think, watched him feel. He showed so much more than his brother. "I have no choice."

"I'll kill him."

Kagome's heart sank. Inuyasha's immaturity always shone through at the worst moments. "Don't. He agreed not to hurt you."

"He what!"

Kagome brushed silver hairs off of Inuyasha's smooth forehead gently, trying to calm him. "Please, Inuyasha. For me."

"So what am I supposed to do? Let him steal you away again?"

"Yes. If I cooperate, he won't kill me. Just let me go along with him. He'll only be with me for a month."

Inuyasha sat up. A few leaves clung to his disheveled hair. "A month! You're going to let that bloodthirsty creature stay with you for a month?"

Kagome plucked out the foliage clinging to the white strands, standing tall against his anger. He didn't scare her anymore. "Yes. I am."

Inuyasha wrapped his arms protectively around her, so that her head lay against his chest. "Don't leave me, Kagome. Please--you can't do this." His voice was cracking.

Guilt hit Kagome head-on. Was did everything always have to be her fault? She resented this part of him: his dependant, childish streak.

Kagome lay against him for a few moments, listening to his heartbeat. She tried to stand up, but his arms held her to him. "Inuyasha, I need to go. I said I'd only be a few minutes."

He tightened his arms and nuzzled her hair. "I won't let you." He purred.

Anger swelled in Kagome's chest. '_He never focuses on the big pictur_e.' She was frustrated with herself because she really wanted to love _all_ of him, and not just the _parts_ she liked. His flaws flashed red in her mind; she felt like a liar in their relationship. "Inuyasha, I need to go. I'm sorry."

Inuyasha let go of her. She stood up and brushed herself off, then extended a hand to him. He simply huffed and pouted at her. She shrugged, and told herself that there wasn't anything else she could do. "Goodbye Inuyasha." She tried to keep it lighthearted. "I'll see you soon, okay? I'll be fine."

He struggled to smile for her. She felt like the biggest bitch; he really did love her. "Bye Kagome. I'll wait here for you! Tell my idiot brother that the next time I see him he'll be six feet under!"

Kagome lingered over the hanyou for just a second, wondering how long he'd wait if she never did come back. He sat dejectedly in the dirt and struggled to hold his composure. She took a long look at him before turning around and walking away.

* * *

A white form spiraled down from the treetops and landed gracefully at her side.

"So you mean to tell me that after _that _that you aren't Inuyasha's bedmate?"

Kagome resisted the urge to punch the demon square in his flawless nose. "Sesshomaru, my sex life is none of your business." She increased her pace along the path so that he wouldn't be walking beside her.

Sesshomaru simply sped up and surveyed her profile out of the corner of his eye. She was too angry at the world to blush at her statement. "If you've been with my half-brother, it is."

The well was in sight. Kagome jogged a little faster. "You _brother's_ sex life is none of your business!" She couldn't believe that they were talking about this.

"It has gotten him into trouble in the past. Kikyo, was it?"

"I'm _not_ gossiping about this with you."

Sesshomaru placed himself between the well and Kagome. "As long as you are not planning to nail him to a tree."

"I'm not! God, I'm not Kikyo! What's with everyone? I'm not going to live somebody else's life!" She marched up to him, squared her jaw, and looked him in the eye. He was quite a tall demon.

Sesshomaru knew the pressure to be someone you aren't. For a second he identified with this small, human female.

Kagome squinted. "Besides, why do you care? Don't you want him dead? If I ever nail him to a tree, you should thank me."

"Yes, dead. By my hand alone."

Kagome tried to walk around him. He moved and blocked her path.

"Sesshomaru, what do you want? Just let me go home!" She flailed her arms in frustration.

Sesshomaru stood with legs shoulder-width apart and one hand resting visibly on the hilt of his sword. "I want to know what you relationship with my brother is."

Kagome was tired and emotionally drained, and she just wanted to get past the demon before her and return home. "It was a mistake!" She blurted out. "There. Happy?"

Sesshomaru raised his eyebrows. He was being downright animated. "What was a mistake? You would rather not know him?"

Kagome blushed bright red and pretended not to hear him.

"Higurashi?"

"Nothing." She looked at her feet and ground a shoe into the ground. It was sprinkled with frost, so she wiped away a semi-circle of white fuzz to reveal dying grass. Back and forth... she hoped absurdly that Sesshomaru would forget his question.

Sesshomaru growled. "Are you engaged?"

Kagome's eyes widened in disbelief. "No! God no!"

There was a long, very awkward silence. Kagome wished that the past few minutes didn't exist. She watched in horror as his smooth, serious expression morphed into one of comprehension.

"Ah. That." Sesshomaru had the nerve to quirk an eyebrow at her. He was obviously enjoying her discomfort. "Was he not gentle?"

Kagome sucked in her breath and gave him a hard look. "I am _not_ talking about this with you. It isn't your business. You are being rude, and I won't stand for it." Hot, shameful tears rose to her throat. She stared at the ground and picked out patterns of grass.

Sesshomaru released a soft, airy sigh. "I will not inquire further." His deep voice was, again, blank.

Kagome relaxed in relief. Sesshomaru stood up on top of the well's rim, and politely extended his hand to her. They locked fingers together before he picked her up and set her gently next to him on the edge. Together, they leapt into the dark.

* * *

Sesshomaru scanned Kagome's pink covers critically.

"I'll change the bedding of course!" Kagome awkwardly tugged at one corner of the sheet. Sesshomaru made no move to help. Eventually she managed to drag it off of her bed, exposing an old mattress coated in various stains. She threw her sheets into the wash, and gathered a fresh bundle from out of the closet.

He stood next to her as she wrestled to attach the new sheets to her mattress. She felt a combination of embarrassment, anger, and irritation when he watched her like this. She was so _flawed_ in so many ways, and she could practically hear him ticking off what she's doing wrong. Why didn't he ever leave her side? Granted it had only been two days since he latched onto her.

She finished setting the bed and straightened up, rubbing her sore back. Sesshomaru waded over to the mattress and poked it with a claw. He then sat down and prodded it with his hand. The bottom of the plywood frame bent under his weight.

"Is it suitable?" Kagome asked. She knew that it wasn't up to his standards, but she didn't have a guest bedroom. It was only polite to sleep on the couch and let your guest have his own room.

Sesshomaru's eyes followed the flowery patterns printed on the blankets. _Isn't it odd that humans spend so much of their short lives asleep?_ It didn't seem productive to him. Then again, he didn't require eight hours a night. They ate so often too! He wondered if she was hungry. He hadn't yet seen her eat, and humans require nourishment at least once a day. "How often do humans eat in this era?"

"Three meals daily. So you're okay with sleeping here?"

Three meals daily. So she'd missed nearly two days worth of food on account of him. The bruises around her arms had more of a yellowish tinge to them. Scratches (from the woods?) dotted her face: a few on her cheeks, and one on her chin. Her clothes were smudged with dirt and reeking of sweat. Her arms hung slack as she looked at him with dark half-circles under her eyes. All in all, the girl looked horrible.

"Where will you sleep?" He asked.

Kagome raised her eyebrows at his unusual display of compassion. "The couch."

Sesshomaru stood up and motioned fluently towards the bed. "You will sleep there. I will rest on the couch should I be in need of sleep."

Kagome's weak protestations were cut off by Sesshomaru's statement of, "Do as I say. I require less sleep than you; it is only logical that you rest in you own room."

Kagome smiled. Again, he tried to pinpoint _what_ exactly he found attractive in her. She looked positively ill. Perhaps it was her voice, or her mannerisms. He turned from her and gazed out the window. It was early evening, and he itched to fly off and explore. How could humans build structures that tall? It was amazing, this technology.

"Sesshomaru, do you think we could take a trip to the city tomorrow? I'm hungry and tired, and I just want to rest."

"A wash would benefit you as well," he added.

Kagome shot him an evil look before deciding that yeah, she could use a shower.

"Yes, I will postpone my tour." He paused, and then asked, "Do you still attend school?"

Kagome shook her head. "It was just too much. I had to be a shard hunter full-time."

"Could you not halt your search for the jewel fragments and continue with your education?"

"No!" Kagome looked absolutely insulted. "I can't leave Inuyasha like that!"

Sesshomaru decided not to comment. "Go bathe."

Kagome left the room. Two seconds later her head poked through the doorway. "Sesshomaru, if my family gets back from the store while I'm in the shower could you be nice to them?"

Sesshomaru didn't look at her. He had his eyes fixed on the sky. A few stars had punched through the navy evening. He watched a plane inch through the blanket of night, amazed again at how far humans had progressed in so short a time span. "I will not hurt them."

Kagome paused before deciding that that was the best she'd get out of him. A few moments later he heard the water running.

As luck would have it, it was at that moment that the family bustled through the door in a whirl of loud voices and crinkling plastic. Sesshomaru floated down the stairs to observe them. He stood, silent and still, before the animated people weighed down with heavy white bags. It wasn't long before all three abandoned the groceries and clumped together, eyeing the Taiyoukai. Without Kagome there was no one to bridge the gap in between worlds. They stood awkwardly before the exotic creature until the old man pointed at Sesshomaru and wrinkled his aged face into an accusatory expression.

"DEMON!"

Sesshomaru's hand itched to clutch the hilt of his sword, but he remembered his vow to Kagome. '_Demon? Well, obviously. Perhaps this is some future ritual?'_ He looked to the woman for guidance, but found only an amused and half-embarrassed expression. He'd never been in a situation as awkward for him as this. He cleared his throat—it came out as a growl, and consequently the boy backed up a few steps—then silkily unfurled his arm and pointed at the red-faced man.

"Human." He lowered his hand slowly to his side, so as not to threaten them. "Now that we have established our respective races, would you care for assistance with your…" He trailed off, wrinkling his nose at the plastic bags. "Food?"

The woman extended her hand. It hung in the air for a few seconds, and then dropped when Sesshomaru responded with a blank expression. She smiled warmly. "My name is Miya, this is Souta, and you can call this guy Grandpa." The old man gave Sesshomaru an evil look before sputtering away to his bedroom, muttering something about 'demon grandchildren' under his breath. Everyone pretended not to hear.

"I am Sesshomaru." He regretted not being able to add: 'Lord of the Western lands.' He reminded himself to find out what had become of his estates.

The boy eyed Sesshomaru suspiciously. "Are you Kagome's boyfriend? Because she's been complaining about Inuyasha for a while, and you seem… what's that thing she wanted… mature!" He smiled at himself for finding the right word.

If Sesshomaru felt uncomfortable before, it was nothing compared to what he was experiencing. The woman surveyed him with narrowed eyes, and the boy fiddled impatiently, awaiting his response. "I am not courting Kagome."

The humans smiled at him. Miya scooped up an armload of groceries and cleared the path towards the kitchen. The boy and demon followed. Once under the yellow kitchen lamplight, she set about opening cupboards and plastic bags efficiently, all the while attempting to make small talk with the demon standing motionless against the doorframe.

"So, how did you meet Kagome?"

Sesshomaru remembered how Kagome lied to her mother, and thought that perhaps she wouldn't wish him to reveal the whole truth. "I dropped by to visit my brother--"

"--Who's your brother?" She interrupted.

"Inuyasha."

"Hm." She pursed her lips while stuffing fish into the overcrowded freezer. Souta watched the scene with an excited smile. "Kagome never mentioned Inuyasha has a brother." She straightened up and wiped her hands on her skirt. "Doesn't surprise me, though. You two are quite alike. Same hair, skin, though you are taller."

On the topic of looks, Souta skirted towards Sesshomaru and gestured at the markings on his glowing skin. "What're those? Inuyasha never had lines."

Sesshomaru remembered his promise to Kagome, and lowered himself to the boy's level. Souta reached out a hand and unabashedly stroked the half-moon resting on his forehead. Sesshomaru went rigid over such intimate contact. It felt odd: rough human skin stroking his. He wasn't often touched outside of battle, with the exception of Kagome. Perplexed as to why her touch didn't make him feel uneasy as the boy's did, he gently enveloped Souta's hand in his own and brought down to the human's side, away from his face. "They are…" He searched for words to explain the thousand-year old tradition to these twenty-first century humans. "They are ceremonial. Human monarchs wear crowns and capes, do they not?"

Souta nodded, wrapped up in the demon's smooth tones.

"My markings serve a similar function. They represent my rank, my status, my power." He stood up, but the boy tugged impatiently on his robe.

"Sayshomaru?"

"Seh-shomaru." The Taiyoukai corrected with narrowed eyes.

The boy didn't seem to notice the demon's irritation, and plowed ahead with his questions. "So you're a king?"

"In a way, yes."

Miya's eyes widened as she plopped a cabbage into the fridge.

Souta gazed at the demon, his brown eyes shining wonder at this new, interesting being. "What's your kingdom like?"

The clock ticked as the room awaited Sesshomaru's response. Miya paused, deflated plastic bags in hand, and looked at Sesshomaru with kind eyes.

"My kingdom is empty."

Souta opened his mouth to ask another question. Luckily his mother intercepted. "Souta? The grown-ups need to talk, dear. Why don't you play video games for a while?"

The boy groaned. "Mama, I'm eight! Can't I stay?"

"No. I'll call you when dinner's ready."

Souta cast one last glance at the Taiyoukai before sulking away, shoulders hunched.

Miya pulled a pot out from a cabinet. "So, Sesshomaru, do you like rice?"

Sesshomaru crossed his arms and leveled a weary look at her. "Plants."

"Pardon?"

In a _whoosh_ Sesshomaru sat himself at the table. "Taiyoukai do not eat plants."

Miya set the pot on the stove. "Taiyoukai?"

Sesshomaru was silent, watching her with clear yellow eyes. It was quite unnerving. She continued, "Inuyasha ate plants."

"Miya, do I _look_ like Inuyasha?"

"Of course you do dear."

Sesshomaru huffed ever-so-slightly in indignation. "I am not my brother. He is not taiyoukai—full blooded like I."

Miya set her hands on her hips and cocked her head to the side. Sesshomaru thought, not for the first time, that she seemed an older, gentler version of Kagome. "Well I can't afford steak every night. You'll have to stomach my veggies."

"I can not." He shifted in exasperation. "Woman, my organs can't process vegetables as yours can. I am not suited to plants."

"Miya—not 'woman.'" She blushed a little in realization that Sesshomaru was a carnivore. She'd assumed that he would be like Inuyasha and eat everything in sight. "Alright, I'll cook you up some meat."

Sesshomaru growled. It was an involuntary reaction stemming from his frustration, but Miya's eyes widened all the same. "Do not cook it!" He clenched his teeth in aggravation. "I will simply not eat."

Miya rushed to his side. "Oh, but you must eat!"

"I ate a cow and three pigs a few days ago. I am not hungry."

Poor Miya, at this point, went a little green. "Okay." She tried to change the topic. "Anyways, what were we talking about? Oh! How you met Kagome! So, you were talking with your brother…"

"When I saw Kagome. She interested me—one does not often see pants on a woman in my time—so I talked to her." The lies streamed over his lips. "She offered me a tour of your time. I had to acquire some documents, however, so we briefly returned to the… past, and I took my papers. She's willing to take me on a tour of the city tomorrow."

Ms. Higurashi checked out the demon critically. There was no way he wouldn't draw attention in the streets. "If I were you Sesshomaru, I'd try to appear human for my tour of Tokyo."

"And how would one do that?"

Miya squinted at him. "A haircut, perhaps. New clothing for sure. Those markings, can you make them go away?"

Sesshomaru rubbed two of his fingers over the blue moon. It was smoother than the surrounding skin, stretched taunt and cold. It felt like scar tissue, almost. "I've had them since birth. They do not _go away_."

Miya clicked her tongue. "Could I cover them up, then?"

Sesshomaru wouldn't have agreed had they been in his domain. It was dangerous not to have them prominently displayed: without a sign of status and power demons from all over would challenge him for the kingdom. But now he wasn't in his castle; he was in a cozy home bordering Tokyo. "Yes. You may cover them."

Miya opened a drawer and retrieved what appeared to be two dull knives attached at the hilt. "May I cut your hair now?"

Sesshomaru nodded. She jogged upstairs to her bedroom and returned with a black plastic comb. Sesshomaru shifted the chair so that his back was to the open kitchen, as opposed to the wall. He adjusted his hair so that it streamed over the back of the chair and piled neatly into the floor. As a last thought he pulled off his pelt and set it gently out of the way. His hair wavered and shimmered, and Miya felt vaguely guilty about ruining something so beautiful.

"So," She said conversationally as the comb glided through his soft strands. It wasn't tangled, despite its volume and length. "How long did it take you to grow this out?"

Sesshomaru closed his eyes and tried to relax. "Seventy-eight years."

Miya made the first cut. A section of the silky white mass was cut off just above his elbows. The hairs fluttered down and rested sadly beneath her feet. "So you've never cut it?"

Sesshomaru frowned. "I cut it during the last war. It isn't convenient to have such long hair while engaged in battle."

"Oh." The cloudy pile at her feet grew. "So, how old are you then?"

"Hundreds of years. I do not count anymore."

Another metallic 'snip' sounded behind his head. "You know," Miya said, "When I first saw you I thought you were a ghost, or a spirit of some sort. I don't know if you could really ever pass for human."

Damp feet padded down the stairs. Kagome rushed into the kitchen, out of breath. She saw her mother cutting Sesshomaru's hair and had the urge to laugh at the absurdity of it all. Sesshomaru didn't open his eyes; he greeted her presence with a 'Good evening, Kagome.'

"Good evening, Sesshomaru." She pulled out a chair and seated herself near to him. She watched his chest rise and fall. It was the only movement his body displayed.

"Kagome, would you mind taking over?" Her mother handed her the scissors and went to check on the water.

Kagome stood and nervously ran her fingers through his half-cut hair. She leveled the line with the comb, then snipped away another section. "You'll need to cover up your moon and stripes, too." She said. "There aren't any demons here to rule over, and they'll only draw attention in the city streets"

Sesshomaru's voice flowed over her, drowning out the sound of a knife on the cutting board in the background. "Inuyasha told you of their purpose?"

Kagome smiled and tucked wet hair behind her ear. "Of course. I've asked him all about you." She bent down and started cutting again.

"Why?"

Kagome thought of her mother in the room, so she bent lower and whispered into his ear, "Know your enemy." Sesshomaru nodded. Miya watched the entire scene out of the corner of her eye.

Finally, his hair was finished. It brushed his elbows like a silver curtain. Kagome swept up the pale remains on the floor, and then deposited them neatly (and a little regretfully) into the garbage. "Would you like a mirror?" She asked as she put the broom back on the corner.

"No." Kagome shot him an odd look, so he explained: "I look as I have looked for hundreds of years. I know my face—I do not need a mirror to see it."

Kagome shrugged, having nothing to say. Sesshomaru watched her buzz around the kitchen, gathering plates and cups. She was wearing light cotton pants and plain, t-shirt. Her hair looked thicker and healthier, her skin seemed brighter, and her smell was markedly sweeter. The table was set. Miss Higurashi (in a surprisingly loud voice) yelled, "Diner!"

The meal could be summed up in one word.

Awkward.

"Sesshomaru dear, would you please pass the salt?"

Really awkward.

"Why're you so white? Are you albino, cause in school I know this kid whose friend had to…"

Awkward beyond belief.

"Demon!"

Kagome wanted to die.

Finally, it was over. The plates were empty, the family was full, and Sesshomaru was thoroughly disgusted. Watching humans eat had never been on of his hobbies.

Kagome glanced at the clock and prayed that her mother wouldn't bring out tea. She didn't think that she could stand anymore of the calm-Sesshomaru-down-so-that-he-doesn't-threaten-my-family game. The demon sitting before her was irritated. She could tell from reading his rigid posture, his tight-lipped expression, and his charged aura. When he was relaxed he seemed to drift smoothly through his actions; now he sat there, calculated and uncomfortable.

Ms. Higurashi entered the room, teapot in hand. Gracefully, she poured the steamy liquid into Sesshomaru and Kagome's mugs. Grandpa had run off. He seemed to have developed a grudge against the white demon, and did everything in his power to either avoid or attack him. Miya had been compelled to forcibly dismiss Souta after he had asked Sesshomaru whether he 'Ate humans', then if they 'taste like ham.'

Sesshomaru cradled his mug and nodded his thanks. Ms. Higurashi watched in interest as he took a delicate sip. She smiled coyly at him. "Those are plants, you know."

Sesshomaru quirked and eyebrow and set the cup down. It was empty, save for a few green leaflets. "I'm aware of that."

"I thought you couldn't digest plants."

Sesshomaru straightened his back and glared at her. "Green tea has many health benefits."

Kagome giggled into her cup.

"What is it?" asked her mother.

The girl just shook her head. Sesshomaru watched her bring the glass to her lips and take a slow drink. Her small, shapely lips seemed dark red against the creamy ceramic mug. Her mouth stretched into a private smile as she tasted comforting tea after a long, stressful day. Her dark hair shimmered in the lamplight. For a moment, watching Kagome smile in this comfortable room, Sesshomaru wondered why demons never shared such peace with one another.

Ms. Higurashi excused herself with a low bow to Sesshomaru and a tight hug for Kagome. He read the pain on her face as she smiled at her daughter. He wondered why she was sad.

The lampshade's warm shadows swam over the walls. Kagome sighed softly and set her empty cup on the table. "You are troubled." Sesshomaru's statement broke Kagome's composure. She hunched over the table with her head in her hands, and her eyes squeezed tightly shut. It was obvious to Sesshomaru that she was trying to block out the world.

"What is troubling you?"

"Everything." She slunk further down towards the wood. "Everything's out of control."

"Accept it."

Kagome turned her tired gaze onto him. "Accept what?"

"Your fate."

She rubbed her face tiredly. "I don't know my fate." She grumbled. "I can't accept what I don't know."

Sesshomaru's hair trembled as he shook his head. "Humans, they are unhappy. They don't accept their place in the world. Always striving to be better, greater; unique in some way. They can't accept that they are nothing."

Kagome huffed. "We aren't unhappy! If anything it's demons that can't realize that they aren't gods." She shot him a pointed look.

He ignored her last attack. "Humans _are_ unhappy. Yes, your inventions are superior to anything my people have produced, but what good has it brought you?" His hands fanned out and gestured to the kitchen. "You have food, shelter, family. What more can you do to make yourselves happy?" He took in her shocked face with a blank stare. "Demons are satisfied with what we are meant to consume. Humans are always searching for things that they can't find."

Kagome was silent for a while as she mulled Sesshomaru's speech. She was determined not to make herself look like an idiot. A part of her admitted that she was excited: this was her first real conversation with the Taiyoukai. "We want…" she placed her hand in Sesshomaru's, and then led him up to her bedroom.

Sesshomaru followed the girl. He thought that she must have a point to make if she was so determined in dragging him around the house. She burst through her door and jogged to her CD player. "It plays music."

He looked at all the buttons and knobs. Kagome inserted a cold, flat disc. The machine shut with a snap. She flipped a button and retreated to his side by the doorway.

"Kagome—"

"—Please, just listen."

Sesshomaru had heard snippets of human music before. He wasn't sure, though, what to expect from this era. Demons did not gravitate towards the arts. A single sound rose and fell against the backdrop of flat fuzz. It wasn't a voice though. It wasn't any animal that he recognized.

"What is that?"

"Violin." She whispered. She'd edged close to him and was half-leaning against his soft pelt.

"Is tha—"

"—Ssh. Listen."

He frowned a little and concentrated on the noise falling out of the human device. The violin formed a simple melody. It went through a series of sad notes, ending on one straining, hopeful beat. It repeated that melody twice, measured and slow. Then another instrument joined the first. They complimented one another perfectly, adding to the growing melody. Sounds in the background wavered back and forth as many voices joined the first two. Soon multiple strings of music danced atop the repetitive beat, illustrating the same line over and over again. It seemed as if the sounds were rising and crashing like waves, struggling to swim over the mathematical timing. The sounds tugged at him; his heart beat to the rhythm and he breathed in the song.

"What is this called?" he whispered.

"Cannon."

The music climbed towards a hopeful, joyous crescendo. He wanted to rise with it above the emptiness that came before the song. He felt the song glide over his body; he saw its story touching his skin. It _almost_ broke free and rose above everything… but then the background faded. Instruments left the song, one by one, until a lone violin remained. It cried out, alone, the chorus that was once so strong and triumphant. It ended wavering on that one sad, hopeful chord before disappearing into the air.

The silence seemed heavier than it did before. He heard their heartbeats, their breaths, the house's sounds.

"Did you feel anything?"

Sesshomaru nodded. "I felt…" He paused and concentrated on the past few minutes. "I felt like I was touching something higher than us. I felt like I was rising with the music."

Kagome smiled. Sometimes, she loved his honestly. "Do you feel emptier now?"

Sesshomaru heard the nothingness. "I do."

She reached out a hand and touched his arm. His head jerked towards her; it was the first time she'd touched him voluntarily. "That emptiness is why we're unhappy."

He looked at her fingers resting in between folds of his shirt. He listened to her melody: her voice's rhythms, her heartbeats timing. "The music though, it helps us read the silence." He looked at her beaming face. "Perhaps the emptiness is actually full; we just need to learn to see it."

Kagome pondered over that. She'd enjoyed talking to him—for the last while he seemed to have forgotten his superiority. He was… respectful.

"It is late."

Kagome followed his gaze to the pitch blackness beyond her window.

"You should sleep." His gaze flickered from her bed to her hand.

She withdrew her touch and turned to him. "Good night, Sesshomaru."

"Good night, Kagome."

He edged the door shut, and then stood still for a few second outside of her bedroom. In his mind he still heard the song rising.


	5. Chapter 5

Kagome stretched underneath her cozy blankets, relishing one of those rare mornings where she awoke in her time. No people to comfort, no people to baby, no people to cook for: just her and her sleep. She let out a satisfied groan as a contented look graced her features. With half-lidded eyes, she swung her legs over her bed. The bright sun was high in the cloudless sky; she'd slept in again. She heaved herself off of her bed and trudged into the hallway, on her way to the washroom. She performed her usual morning routine before grabbing some cash, and heading downstairs to rummage for some food.

"I don't know where. Probably in the store. It's just not as popular as pop music, that's all." Voices drifted form the kitchen.

"Would Kagome know?"

"Perhaps. I've always preferred country."

"The landmass with political barriers?"

Kagome entered the room to find Sesshomaru and her mother seated at the table. He looked less on guard--relaxed, even--in Ms. Higurashi's presence. Then again, she had a way with making people feel comfortable. She sat beside him, talking casually to the demon with a cheerful spark in her eyes.

"Good morning!" Greeted her mother. "Look who's finally risen from the dead."

Sesshomaru visibly stiffened at Miya's last words. "She is like Kikyo, then?"

Kagome rolled her eyes. "Figure of speech."

The demon huffed. Something was different about him… "You aren't wearing your armor." Kagome observed.

"It was not necessary." He said flatly. Kagome smiled a little at that.

He drew himself up, and floated over to her side. She was rummaging through the fridge, bent at what looked like a very uncomfortable position. Finally she straightened up with a triumphant grin, apple in hand.

"Kagome."

She started in shock: Sesshomaru was standing an inch away from her. He leaned a bit closer to her; so close that their breath intermingled and Kagome was glad she'd brushed her teeth. His entire posture was stiff, like a cat ready to pounce.

"What?" She tried to think of the apple in her hand; not the demon's bright eyes.

"We will go out today."

She nodded quickly. His intensity was making her nervous.

"When we go out," he continued, "You will take me to a store that sells portable… devices. You will give me songs that I can hear in my era. Then, we will go to a library and look at other human arts."

A moment passed. Kagome's apple was slick with sweat. "It that all?"

He withdrew his body with a rush of wind; before Kagome could blink he was seated next to her mother. "Yes."

Kagome set the apple down on the counter and clapped her hands together. "Alright! I can do that!" Sesshomaru seemed mildly amused at her enthusiasm. She bit a sticky chunk out of her apple, then wormed into her fall jacket. She murmured a quick 'goodbye momma' before padding out the front door.

* * *

"We can not use the automobile?" Sesshomaru swished through plies of darkening leaves as he slid down the path by her side.

Kagome swallowed her apple chunk, coughing a little as a piece scraped her throat. "Car." She grated out.

"Pardon?"

She took another large bite and responded to him while chewing, unknowingly providing him with flashes of white, mushy piles in her mouth. Sesshomaru backed away a step. "I know it said 'automobile' in the book." She munched loudly. "But nowadays, we call it a 'car'."

"Is that normal as well?"

"What?"

Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes. "Eating while conversing."

Kagome's skin burned red as she snapped her mouth closed. As a second thought, she tossed the half-eaten apple into a ditch. "No. It's considered rude, actually."

Thankfully Sesshomaru spared her his taunting. Instead, he asked again why they couldn't take the car.

Kagome frowned and kicked a burgundy plop of foliage, quite forcefully. "I don't have my license."

"What requirements must you meet before being granted the right to drive a car?"

Her feet dragged along the pavement. "You have to take a test." She huffed and sulked for another step. "And be eighteen."

"You are not yet of age?"

"I'm nineteen."

Sesshomaru's eyes scanned dark branches cross-crossing above their heads. The morning sun beat down on the pavement. Gently, the soft breeze swayed the gnarled, naked trees. Nineteen--these young plants were older than her!

"Do you enjoy the Fall?" He rumbled.

Kagome's windbreaker flapped in the air's cool currents. "I don't know." His random question had taken her off-guard, so she ended up spouting the first feeling that rose to her mind. "It's sort of sad, I find."

"The approaching winter saddens you?"

Her eyes traced glittering frost lining dead grass. "Yes."

"Because the earth dies?"

Kagome nodded.

Sesshomaru tried to remember when he didn't like winter. It was always just 'there', like everything else. He felt no emotions towards the weather. Perhaps it was a human attribute; maybe he was simply too old. "At least you feel saddened."

Her gaze followed the lines of Sesshomaru's profile. "What's worse than being sad?" She asked.

Sesshomaru's pale eyes rose to watch the sun in the sky. "Feeling nothing."

Kagome swallowed and looked at the ground, unsure of what to say. She decided to switch topics. "So I'm of age, but I don't have time to get a license. What's the point anyway, when I'm in your era all the time?"

Sesshomaru didn't respond. She took that as meaning that their conversation had ended, so she focused on the path ahead. They were nearly at the street. She wondered how he would react to a cars streaming around him.

He stopped before the concrete river. With one heavy, cautious step, he commenced his walk across the road.

It took two and a half seconds before a car almost barreled into him. With not a moment to spare, he leapt away from the skidding vehicle. Kagome's stomach dropped; she looked below her to see little gray squares in a dark grid. The city spread beneath her feet.

"Sesshomaru! Land, now!" She wrapped her limbs a tighter around him. Without his armor she felt his muscles contract and stiffen as he leapt into the sky. His slow heartbeat drummed against her chest. "Someone will see us!"

His wary eyes dropped to the city below them. "It is not safe."

Kagome twitched in impatience. "God, not even Inuyasha reacted this badly! It was only a car!"

The air pummeled into her body, and then they were on sturdy ground. Blue skies stretched in every direction. He'd landed on top of a high-rise.

"Do not compare me to Inuyasha, and I will not compare you to Kikyo." His body was stiff, his tones angry.

Kagome decided that a compromise was reasonable. "Alright. But only if you tell me you're going to lift me up before you go flying around."

"Agreed. I will lift you up now."

Her stomach lurched again, and before she could gasp they were on solid ground.

"I meant _ask,_ not tell me."

Sesshomaru's silence was drowned out by the sounds of a busy street. They were on a sidewalk, surrounded by people. Curious people. All looked at the odd pair out of the corners of their eyes, apparently too shy to approach the strange couple. Cars streamed past the sidewalk; Sesshomaru held in a cough. A few vehicles beeped their horn at the taiyoukai as they swooped past.

"So, this is the city!" Kagome peered up and tried to gauge his reaction.

Sesshomaru seemed to be trying not to gag. The _smell_ of his place—car fumes, chemicals, and too many humans. It seeped into his throat and made his lungs ache.

"Are you okay?" Kagome asked, concerned.

"Your city reeks." He stated plainly.

"Oh." Kagome took a lungful of air, but only detected faint car fumes and the smell of autumn. "I'll take your word for it."

He seemed to have moved past the smell, and was following the lines of people marching down the pavement. Nearly every one pretended that he didn't exist after sneaking a glance in his direction.

"They fear me?"

Kagome dodged a briefcase and squished herself up against the sturdy demon, trying to avoid getting swept away in the tide of people. "I think they think you're crazy."

A child lagged behind his parents, transfixed on the exotic, white-haired man. His mother gasped and jerked his hand away from the demon, shooting Sesshomaru a dirty look.

"What shall we do to remedy this?" He asked her.

She observed the smooth lines of his face, punctuated by his markings. "We need to use makeup and cover your marks." Her eyes drifted to his choppily-cut hair, glimmering golden in the sunlight. It hung over halfway down his back like a silken bulls-eye. "Your hair. We need to either cut it shorter, or tie it back. We should dye it a darker colour. We could get contacts—human devices that stick onto your eyes—to change you eye colour. Your fangs and ears, though, we can't do anything about. I suppose we could cut or file down your claws. And clothes! You need some twenty-first century gear."

He glared at her. "I will not stick human machines into my eyes. Nor will I coat my hair or skin in your chemicals."

"How about you just put some makeup on, then? We could just tie your hair back and buy you some sunglasses." Kagome latched onto his shirt and started dragging him towards the nearest mall.

"Sunglasses?" The crowds of people parted before them.

"Opaque glasses that darken sunlight, so that it doesn't hurt your eyes."

"And bright sunlight injures human eyes?"

"Yeah." Kagome skipped over a curb and jogged through revolving doors. Sesshomaru glided behind her, his flowing robes swishing over the tile entrance. People openly stared as the odd couple wove in-between food-court tables. "Doesn't this place smell better?" Kagome tried to fill in the gaping silence.

The sharp stench of disinfectant clawed up Sesshomaru's nose. "No. What is that chemical smell?"

Kagome paused before a lit-up map with a listing of stores, sorted by category. "Probably cleaner."

The plastic-scented sign was irritating Sesshomaru's throat. "Do most human dwellings use cleaner?"

Kagome nodded while skimming over store titles. "Almost all. My house is an exception—we stopped using chemicals after Inuyasha nearly fainted. Mom had just polished the table… There!" She smiled widely and pointed down a hallway lined with shops. "We go down there, take a left, and then we're at the drugstore!" She marched confidently ahead of him.

Once they were inside the store Sesshomaru found himself craving the sun and pure outdoors. How could humans live confined inside a metal world? Kagome wandered off and started browsing through a wall of shiny products. Mirrors glared at him from every alcove. So many _things_ everywhere; this city was so cluttered! A few human females drifted in between rows of shelves, pausing to give him odd looks whenever they passed near him.

"Sesshomaru!"

He walked to her side. She was leaning over an array of peach-toned things with a frustrated frown on her face. Another human female—a few years younger than Kagome, by the look of it—stood by her side. She was wearing a dark apron, and peering at him from under yellow bangs. "You're looking for some cover-up?" She gave him a confused look.

Kagome whipped around and spoke for him. "He partied last night and got some bad tattoos. We're going to my sister's wedding today, so we'll need some cover-up before his laser-removal appointment."

The girl nodded a little, not looking completely convinced that he wasn't psychotic.

"The wedding's in medieval-themed, so that's what the robes are about." Kagome bumbled around for reasons as to why Sesshomaru looked like… well… Sesshomaru. "And your eye infection's looking better today, darling!" She wrapped her fingers around his and shot him a meaningful look.

The salesgirl appeared slightly more at-ease with the demon. She smiled warmly at the couple. "Alright. So… maybe 'ivory' would suit you." The girl held up a cream-coloured card to his skin. She frowned at the paper. "It's too dark. Hm. Perhaps 'fair ivory'?" She flipped another card up to his face. "No…" She sighed and procured another coloured slip. "This is our Whitetest—'light ivory.' She smiled at him. "There! We have it!" She rifled through rows of makeup until she found a thick concealer stick. She passed it to Kagome, and then excused herself after pointing them towards the cashier's counter.

Waiting in line, Kagome eyed rows of hair dye wistfully. "Can't you just try it, Sesshomaru?"

"Does it wash off?"

"No. At least, it wouldn't on you. Your hair is too light." She shuffled forwards.

"I do not want any human substances on my head that will not wash out."

Kagome shrugged and conceded the battle.

* * *

Once they left the store Kagome led Sesshomaru into the women's washroom.

"Is this not for females?"

Kagome shrugged and struggled to open the package. Sesshomaru shredded it with his claws. He looked around and fought the urge to bolt out of the empty room. His head swam with the putrid scent of human waste smothered in human chemicals.

"You just roll up the stick." Kagome demonstrated. "And then you put it on your skin." She trailed a pale line overtop her forehead, and then handed the cover-up to him. He peered at himself in the mirror as she rubbed the makeup off of her skin. His hair hung just above the counter.

"Do you like your hair?" she asked.

"Hm." He didn't seem to care either way. Clawed fingers wrapped around the stick and slid it over his face. A red stripe disappeared. The makeup caked and cracked, but it would have to do. He buried his other facial lines, then the ones on his wrists. Kagome watched him shut his eyelids and draw clear lines over slim red marks. At last he blanketed the moon. Stepping back, he surveyed himself in the streaky mirror.

"You look more human," Kagome observed. She didn't like it; he seemed too bare.

Sesshomaru stood stiffly, staring at his unfamiliar face. "When I was a child," he murmured flatly, "I once cut off my markings."

Kagome's eyes widened as she took in his blunt, personal statement. "Why?"

"My father died. I looked like him; yet I am not him. I thought that it was the markings that mislead people."

"Oh." Inuyasha had told her that his father died, but she didn't know it was while Sesshomaru was still young. "How old were you when he died?"

"My young teens, perhaps. I'm not sure of which exact year." His eyes hadn't left his human face.

"Did you become the new Lord right away?"

Sesshomaru turned away from his reflection. He walked away from Kagome, towards the washroom door. "There was no one else."

Kagome didn't know what to say, so she kept quiet and let the silence fill the gap.

* * *

Ten minutes later they were standing before the 'menswear' section of an outlet store. Sesshomaru stood stiffly before the rows upon rows of foreign clothing. Kagome felt the fabric on a pair of pants. "What size are you?" she asked while tugging on a label.

"Nine and a half hand spans down, seven across."

Kagome tugged a pair off of a rack. "Whose hand spans?"

"Whoever is measuring my garments. I look at their hands, then adjust my calculations. Your hands are small."

"Hm." Kagome held up a pair before him and squinted, her tongue poking out of her mouth. "Why don't you try on these and tell me how they fit?"

Sesshomaru started undoing his sash.

"No! Not in here!" Kagome went beet red.

His hands dropped. "Is this not a clothing store?"

"Yes, but..." She stuffed the pants into his arms and turned him towards the changing rooms. "You dress in there."

Sesshomaru drifted behind the mirrored door only to emerge ten seconds later, confused. He marched over to Kagome and gestured to his zipper. "What does one do with this contraption?"

Kagome looked at her feet with wide, horrified eyes. "You pull it up. It's called a zipper."

She heard a 'zip', and Sesshomaru's foot tapping against the cold floor. "I am clothed."

Kagome glanced up to see him sporting a pair of black dress pants with his white undershirt. They fit nicely with the exception of the cuffs, which rode a few centimeters above his ankles. Kagome decided that they'd do. "Alright! Now we need to get you a shirt."

"What is wrong with this one?"

She looked over the sleeveless silk top. It seemed to be a cylinder with some holes in it; not a properly fitting garment. "It isn't the style that people wear in this era."

Sesshomaru didn't respond, which she took as a 'yes'. So after a few more minutes, Sesshomaru walked out of the store swathed in a pale, long-sleeved cotton shirt and black pants. The stares weren't as noticeable as they were before.

"Are you sure you don't want a few more pairs?"

Sesshomaru carried his silky robes in his arms as he gracefully side-stepped a toddler. "Why would I need more clothing than I can wear?"

Kagome shrugged, figuring that taiyoukai don't sweat, or smell, or do anything otherwise human that would dirty their clothes.

He paused before an open store. "Are sound devices sold here?"

'Electronics plus!' decorated the entrance. Gizmos of every kind lined the walls. Lights and screens blinked on and off. Sesshomaru walked into the store and approached a middle-aged man seated behind a counter. Kagome stuck like glue to his side.

"I require a mechanism that emits sound." Kagome concentrated on not covering her face in embarrassment.

The man looked at the demon before him with a wide frown. He pushed up his glasses and squinted his eyes. "Are you English or something?"

Kagome nudged him, so Sesshomaru nodded slowly, his head held high. "Yes. I hail from England. Do you have a sound-making device?"

The man scratched his eyebrow. "Do you mean a CD player?"

"CD's are the flat, circular discs?"

"Sure are. Are you sure you're from Europe?"

Kagome nodded for him. "I think we can find a CD player on our own. Thanks for your help." She dragged Sesshomaru by his wrist into an aisle.

"You do not need to touch me so often." He glared pointedly at his wrist.

"Sorry." Kagome mumbled. She let go of his skin and focused on the CD players lining the walls. "Here." She pulled a relatively cheap-looking one off he shelf and handed it to Sesshomaru. "It needs electricity to run, so I'll buy you some batteries."

"And what when the batteries run out?"

Kagome shrugged. "I don't know. Find me and I'll buy you some more."

He nodded, content with the agreement. "I now require a CD."

Starting towards the counter, Kagome remembered not to touch him; just trust that he was following behind her. It was odd not to hear his robes swishing in her wake. She paid (purchasing batteries as well), then led him to a music store.

Sesshomaru wandered through the layers of square, plastic packages. So much music! He didn't know there could be so many songs made up of so few instruments.

"Here." Kagome handed him a CD entitled 'Pachabel.' She scooped up 'Bach', 'Beethoven', 'Tchaikovsky', 'Chopin', 'Baroque', 'Hayden', and 'Brahms'. Sesshomaru recognized none of the names. She snagged a 'greatest eighties hits', just for kicks. As she paid she muttered something about 'bank account'.

They slid out of the store, bags in hand. "Where to now?" Kagome asked. "Do you want some sunglasses?"

Sesshomaru thought of all the knowledge this era held. His eyes brightened; he was excited for the first time in years. "A library."

* * *

Sesshomaru smiled. Not a sarcastic smile. Not a maniacal smile. Not a condescending smile. His eyes narrowed in a purely happy expression, and his lips spread so wide that the tips of his sharp fangs protruded. Kagome felt a swell of warm pride. She'd led him to the library.

He stood still at the entrance, his elegant arm resting on a smooth, dark wood shelf. His pretty eyes took in the rows and rows of books. "How many?" He asked. His sharp vision didn't stray from the paper volumes.

"I don't know. Thousands here, maybe. You've read about the printing press?"

Sesshomaru was drawn towards the books like a magnet. Even without his voluminous robes he seemed to float on air, drifting like a cloud. "I read of it." He reached out for the closest book and drew it to him, opening up a random page. "I have a library in my castle." He added offhandedly.

"Yeah?" Kagome bounced to his side. She snuck a peak over his shoulder—he was reading the dictionary.

His claws skimmed over a yellowed page, pausing at each unfamiliar word. The smell of paper was a refreshing change.

"How big is your library?" Kagome pried into any personal information. She knew so little of the demon!

Sesshomaru felt content, amidst the sounds of pages turning and voice whispering. The metallic streets seemed a million days away. He flipped over page, observing the fold of the sheets; the thick cloth binding; the small, perfect print. "My library is small." He breathed into the pages. "The books are handwritten. My father wrote most." He snapped the volume shut and placed it back on the shelf.

"Have you ever written a book?"

"Many." Sesshomaru explored the library with clear eyes. It was a modern building, large and organized. The large windows and soft carpets led to a comfortable, open air. Thick chairs sat near streamlined tables.

"What do you write books on?"

Sesshomaru scanned shelf titles: biography, non-fiction, fiction… "What is fiction?"

Kagome hung onto her question. "What do you write books on?"

"Various topics. War strategies, medicinal plants, weapons manuals." He sauntered over to a shelf and traced the spine of a novel with his fingers. "What is fiction?"

"Stories that aren't true."

Sesshomaru stilled at that. "Humans write of lies?"

"I suppose so, yes."

He narrowed his eyes. "What is the point of that?"

Kagome's mouth faltered, halfway between open and shut. She wasn't sure how to answer that. She forced herself to wait and gather the thoughts strewn around her head. "Do you know myths?"

An angry look flashed across his face, and for a moment Kagome thought he would strike her. Her fear faded quickly; she reminded herself that he'd been gentle. "Of course I know myths. I am not idiot."

"Well, don't they have points?"

He saw the connection and nodded his head once in her direction. "So fiction books are myths."

"Yep."

Sesshomaru picked up a book. "I would like to read a fiction." He peered at the title: To Kill a Mockingbird. "What is the story in this book?"

Kagome shrugged. "It's quite a famous novel, but I've never read it."

Sesshomaru pocketed the book. "I will read it then."

"You can't just take it!" she screeched.

"Why not?"

Kagome remembered who she was talking to. "Well, I supposed _you_ can."

"Excuse me?" A raspy voice interjected.

They turned to see an elderly woman carrying a small armload of books. "Would you please quiet down?"

Kagome smiled and nodded; Sesshomaru glared. The woman drifted out of their sight.

"Have human visual arts advanced as well?" Sesshomaru stood straight and still, peering down at Kagome. She couldn't help but notice that his new shirt was more form-fitting that anything she'd ever seen him in.

"What do you find so fascinating about my chest?"

Kagome sputtered and felt her skin flame red. "Uh… that shirt looks good on you?" _'Well that sounded intelligent.' _She mentally kicked herself.

"You find me attractive." He specified.

She wasn't sure whether to hate him for his arrogance, or hate him for his straightforwardness. She decided to hate him for being him. Mortified, she didn't address his statement. "What did you ask about art?"

"You have forgotten already?"

Kagome huffed and stamped her foot onto the carpeted floor. The muffled 'thump' drew a few irritated looks. "I didn't forget! I just didn't hear."

Sesshomaru raised his eyebrows in a mocking expression. "Oh, you didn't hear. Perhaps I should write it out?"

She was tired of him making her feel inferior. At that point she was torn between walking away and striking him. He puffed out his chest and shot an amused look in her direction. Impulsively, she kicked him jerkily in the shin.

For a terrifying moment, she thought that he would claw her foot off. Instead he took in her abuse with a small quirk of his eyebrow. "Your best shot?"

Kagome blew up in his calm and sarcastic face. "You are a _jerk_, Sesshomaru. Find your own damn books!"

He was just about to open his mouth and respond when they felt it. Kagome started at the familiar aura appearing so close so suddenly; Sesshomaru wrinkled his nose and stood slightly in front of the human. A second later a pink blur smashed open the heavy door and shattered the peaceful silence of the library. Confused citizens fled; some stayed and stared, open mouthed, as the blur materialized to reveal a hanyou stalking towards the tall, beautiful demon. Pages scattered around the air, fluttering in his wake.

"Inuyasha! You promised!" Kagome slid around Sesshomaru's defensive form and ran to meet her lover. She fought to keep the hot swell of angry tears in her throat. "You promised! God, you're making a scene! We need to get out of here before the police…" She faltered when she saw his face.

He was scared. Eyebrows knit together in panic framed wild, frightened eyes. "We need your help."

Sesshomaru stayed still in the background. "Why do you require my guide's assistance?"

Inuyasha balked a bit at seeing his brother dressed like a human. Blinking away, he reminded himself not to get distracted. He couldn't afford a fight. He focused on Kagome, on her anxious, beautiful face. He watched it crumble as he spoke his next words.

"Kaede's dying."


	6. Chapter 6

When someone dies, a world falls away. Kagome felt like the floor was shifting under her feet, felt the air turn cold and stale with dread. Heat crept into her face as her vision seemed to falter. She took a deep breath. _'Don't forget to breathe'_, she thought. Her safety net was shredding with every moment. The feudal era suddenly seemed like a dark, frightening land.

But she could still save Kaede.

Inuyasha's arms encircled her. They raced out of the library, overtop roofs and in between factories. His grip was tighter than Sesshomaru's, as if he feared she would fall away and leave him. Kagome's body shook with every rough landing.

"I haven't been practicing." The wind stole her voice from her, ripping the meek words from her lips.

"You'll have to try." Inuyasha's raw voice was laced with fear. She rarely saw him so openly scared, and it unnerved her.

Sesshomaru followed them, forgotten. His softly carved features revealed nothing of what transpired behind his beautiful face.

"What if I can't?" Kagome asked, more to herself than anyone else. The shrine loomed black in her vision.

Inuyasha landed at the base of the hill. He raced towards the well, Kagome in his arms. "Then she will die." The finality of his blunt words hit her like a punch in the stomach.

They were in the shrine. Inuyasha raced over the wooden panels and leapt clear down the hole. Sesshomaru drifted behind. His streamlined body cut through the frosted air as he followed them. A flash of blue light filled the room, and then they were gone.

* * *

"She wants you to go in alone."

Kagome grasped Inuyasha's hands tightly. She didn't want to greet death without another life by her side. "Please, Inuyasha…"

The hanyou forced a smile to surface. "You can do it, Kagome. Just try. I'll be right outside."

The harsh yellow sun suddenly seemed ominous, illuminating the sad scene below. There were no shadows for her to hide in. Kagome eyed the woods and thought of running far, far away. She wanted to run and keep going, until she collapsed and her thoughts were smothered with exhaustion. Somewhere among the trees, Sesshomaru waited.

Kaede's weak voice reached out of the empty hut. "Enter, child."

Kagome's was drawn through the entranceway, away from the sun and Inuyasha's protection. She knelt by the old woman's side, somehow reluctant to admit that this was happening.

The woman's smile faded into a slow, aching sigh. "Hello." Tears beat down Kagome's barriers and slid mournfully along the contours her face. She could sense Kaede's death hovering around them like fog. The aura of blackening life choked the tiny wooden hut. The woman's strong, sturdy shoulders appeared weak and frail as she lay overtop a few blankets. Her entire body was still; only her chest struggled to rise and fall. A thick gurgle streamed over her lips, followed by another sore cough. Kagome took the woman's hand in hers.

"I don't know how to heal you." Kagome 's breath hitched. Failure gripped her pounding heart.

Kaede's kind eyes were calm as she took in the distraught Miko. "I did not," she rasped, "Fetch ye here to heal me."

Kagome burned with dread. "You can't die! I have to heal you… I have to try…" She closed her eyes and concentrated on finding her centre. She tried to focus on the sluggish beating of her heart; she tried to picture the blood rushing through her veins. But her thoughts kept drifting to the woman at her side, and she lost any chance of finding her rhythm.

Kaede's eyes seemed to stare at nothing, but her face was sketched with wonder. "Death, child, not what ye should fear." She smiled a little and squeezed Kagome's hand in her fragile grip.

Kagome wanted to run. She wanted to pray, or heal, or cry, or scream; she wanted to do anything but watch her mentor deteriorate. "You'll be gone." The scene seemed surreal and distant, and Kagome felt oddly detached from the world. What a sad, quiet demise! No glorious battle ended the life of the Miko who'd seen so much. Time's careless force had leaked all the life out of her.

Kaede continued in a whisper. "But I shall be the wood, the raindrops, flowers." She smiled sadly at Kagome's pained face. "I'll be your tears. So many forms, so many." Calmness radiated off of the old woman. "It is… my natural state."

Kagome's eyes ran along the length of Kaede's weak body. Selfishly, she didn't want her to go. She wanted to hold tightly on to her and drag her over from the brink of nothingness.

Death was winning their tug-of-war. Kaede's breaths were leaking slowly, sluggishly from her lungs. She turned her wrinkled face to Kagome's. Her serious expression lent way to a proud smile. "Kagome, listen. Ye… were meant for greater things." She paused and tried to collect her fleeting strength. "The final battle will end. Hang on to it, Kagome. Hang on. You will unite them. Fate's mistake will be…" She faltered, no longer able to force air through her empty lungs. She couldn't force the full message past her lips; she couldn't tell Kagome the full story. It was coming too soon now. She pooled all of her remaining energy together, summoning enough to push her last breath into the cold air. "Erased." It was here now.

Kaede's eyes fluttered shut. Her entire being seemed to freeze in its last moments, any signs of life ebbing away. She was dead.

* * *

Sesshomaru watched the hut from beneath bare trees. A pure veil of snow crunched underneath his shifting feet. He thought of Kagome, alone in the hut with a corpse. He stretched back into his clouded memories and recalled his first brush with loss.

_His mother was holding him. She was sick, everyone said. She was dying. The woman clutched him tightly to her chest, her breaths shallow and pained. They were in a room with silk walls and a large, open window. The air was thick with spring lilies and the sour smell of illness. Her smooth hands were running up and down his arms, soothing and soft. "My little one." She was murmuring, her head against plush pillows. "I won. Did you know that? I'm sick, but I did it. You're my life." Sesshomaru snuggled up to her and didn't understand anything._

Kagome emerged. Inuyasha ran to her, trying to be strong but obviously upset. They clasped each other tightly. Kagome buried her head into Inuyasha's shirt. They stood together in front of the hut for a few moments, leaning into one another. After a long, sad moment Inuyasha detangled his arms. With leaden steps he entered the hut to bury the dead. Kagome turned away from the shelter, looking out at the trees. A bird sang in Sesshomaru's silence. He watched her cry.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N- _These lyrics from Lenord Cohen's song, 'Closing Time' sprung to my mind while I wrote this chapter. I thought these words (not sure about the song, but the words) fit._

"Yeah I missed you since the place got wrecked  
By the winds of change and the weeds of sex  
looks like freedom but it feels like death   
it's something in between, I guess  
it's closing time"

* * *

The firelight threw itself upon Kagome's face, leaping and dancing on top of her stoic expression. She stared with dark eyes into the heat eating away at a pile of fresh wood. _'Find my center._' Tendrils of flame twisted and collapsed on top of one another in a steady, crackling rhythm. She tried to think of nothing but the smoke swallowing the night air. Before long the waves of flame became less bright and began moving at a steady, predictable pace. She wasn't looking _at_ it, but _through_ it. She was looking at… 

Nothing. The colours faded, and for one brief moment she felt her heart beat in the nothingness. She felt its tug: its power lying dormant. This sudden realization jerked her out of her trance, and she lost any grip she had on her abilities.

"Kagome? You okay?" Inuyasha peered at her from across the wavering curtain of fire.

"Yeah. I was just thinking."

He shifted his crossed legs and glanced quickly at the darkness surrounding them. Sesshomaru's scent drifted from the woods. He hadn't approached the village yet; he was hiding silently amongst black branches. They'd yet to figure out why he hadn't confronted them. Inuyasha forced his attention back onto Kagome. She was sitting hunched over, staring into the base of the fire. "It wasn't your fault." He tried to lighten her burden.

Kagome ignored him. Her steady eyes focused on the jumping flames.

"I mean," Inuyasha continued, "I bet if she wanted to be revived you could have healed her."

Her power slipped out of her grasp again, hovering just beyond her fingertips. She huffed down to lie on the rough wood floor. Blankets twisted with her frustrated movements. "I couldn't. I tried." The admission didn't give her a sense of relief; instead it hung heavy on her guilty heart. Speaking it out loud, she reeled away from the fact that Kaede would be there--sitting beside her--if she hadn't failed.

Inuyasha saw her body sink down with her words. He saw the trails of old tears shining on her cheeks. "It was probably for the better." Her eyes snapped up to look at his words. "I mean—she didn't want to be healed. Maybe she had a reason."

Kagome shifted in the shadows. "She wanted to die, I think."

"Why would anybody want to die?" Inuyasha asked out loud.

Her gaze turned to the floor beneath her elbows. She traced the delicate wooden lines; the heavy, dark furrows in between boards; the ragged brown waves shifting with every piece to form a complicated pattern. She thought about the building, tired and worn. She remembered Sesshomaru's longing when he spoke of death. "Maybe…" She lightly traced a wooden knot. "Life gets boring after a while." _She saw her death reflected in the floorboards_. _A million forms…_ "We're all just matter." _She saw lifetimes hidden in the dirt beneath her, the air around her, her skin and veins._

"Still doesn't make sense to me. I think she was losing it in her final days, anyway."

Kagome shook herself out of her trance. She squirmed up to sit comfortably straight, her back exposed to the darkness. "Why do you say that?"

Inuyasha wrinkled his nose and, again, glanced around the hut. He adjusted his seated position, wary of the night's deceptive quiet. "She kept asking to see Sesshomaru."

"_Fate's mistake… You will unite them"._ Kagome couldn't find a way to link her words to the Taiyoukai beyond the flickering light. Perhaps Kaede _had_ lost it. "That's odd. Has she ever spoken to him before?"

Inuyasha shrugged. "Maybe while I was stuck to the tree. I don't know. I don't think they have any connection, anyway." He grumbled a bit as he sniffed the air again. "Best not to think about her."

"Probably." The words escaped Kagome's mouth without any conviction. In an attempt to reign in her thoughts she focused on the Hanyou before her. A question popped out of nowhere and fell out of her mouth before she could think about the implications. "Do you love me, Inuyasha?"

Surprised eyes turned to her face, flickering yellows and browns in the warm light. "Why'd you have to ask?"

She shrugged, a little embarrassed, and hoped that he wouldn't ask her the same question back. _Do you love me, Kagome?_ She tried. That's all she thought she could say. But trying wasn't good enough, was it? So she smiled in relief when he didn't seem interested in perusing that topic any further.

A calm moment passed, decorated with the snapping of flames and the wind's low howl.

"When will Miroku and Sango get back?" Kagome asked.

Inuyasha swallowed heavily and peered unblinkingly into the darkness. "Three days at the most. Was pretty stupid of us to send for a healer so late, wasn't it?"

"Not really."

He shrugged. Kagome's eyes swept over the half-demon, sitting cross-legged inside the circle of light. His red haori was piled clumsily around his still form. The mass of fair hair on his head shimmered reds and yellows as it swished onto the floor. Kagome remembered running her fingers through his hair--she remembered the thrill, the racing heartbeats, the heavy breaths and throaty whispers. She couldn't seem to link _that _Inuyasha with the one sitting before her. _Old_ Inuyasha was handsome, daring and bold, swift and strong. He was caring and loving and perfect. _Now_ he was different. He was childish, impatient, loving and brave, and… human.

But those two Inuyasha's were the same; it was her who'd changed. She'd made love to a fantasy, a vision of what she wanted him to be. Now time was poking holes in her perception of him, cracking an illusion to reveal a flawed being. _Why_, she wondered for the millionth time, _did I never notice that in him before?_

"How long is Sesshomaru going to be hanging around us?" Inuyasha asked, wrinkling his nose again.

Kagome shrugged. "A month?"

Inuyasha shifted. His frustrated sigh broke the heavy silence. "Can't you just tell him off?"

"No!" Anger welled in Kagome's stomach. '_He always blames things on me!'_

Inuyasha ignored her cry. The rugged angles of his face twisted to form a vulnerable expression, rare in such a stubborn demon. Inuyasha's pretty eyes—so _human_ compared to his brother's—watched Kagome pouting. He wanted to touch her mouth. He wanted to take her in his arms. He wanted to… But Sesshomaru may come and steal her away, and what if she didn't return this time? "Why does he need you?" Inuyasha asked. His voice was softer than usual.

Kagome wondered that herself. _'Why does he want me?_' It wasn't as if he _needed_ her, really. He had enough knowledge about the future. He could take out a book on his own, if he needed. It wasn't as if she were spectacularly beautiful, and she doubted that he enjoyed her company. So why? "Maybe for a place to stay?" She suggested.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "Why would he need a place to stay?"

"A bed to sleep in?"

He waved his arms around impatiently, dangerously close to the fire. An angry look consumed his features. "Why would he need a bed, Kagome? The creep doesn't sleep! He could walk for days and days and not need _anything_. He could live on the streets and be fine. He doesn't _need_ your house." He calmed a bit, slightly guilty that his worry had exploded into an angry outburst. "I don't understand why he'd ask this of you."

"Me neither." Kagome shivered and reminded herself that she was surrounded by safe wood. She pretended that the world didn't exist beyond the circle of wavering golden light. Still, she couldn't' shake off the feeling that Sesshomaru sat perched on the darkness, watching her.

A look of utmost seriousness passed over Inuyasha's glowing eyes. "You can't leave again. We think that the final battle is coming soon. Naraku's puppets are showing up all the time now. And we need you there, Kagome, for the fight. You're still working on your healing, but if you have some arrows you're dangerous. Stay until then." He ended gruffly, guarded with his arms crossed. It was an order--not a suggestion.

"God Inuyasha, I _would_ if your insane brother hadn't decided to kidnap me! It wasn't really my choice!" Her heart thrummed in anger.

He clenched his fists and leaned forward. "Well if you'd let me _talk_ to him, we could sort something out!"

Kagome glared at the empty space where his sword once rested. "Inuyasha, you don't even have a weapon. Don't kid yourself--you aren't able to _talk_ without getting pissed and beating something up."

"And Sesshomaru _is_?"

She clambered up in a swell of anger. Her nails dug into her palms as she looked down at Inuyasha, eyes narrowed. "I wasn't talking about Sesshomaru. I was talking about _you_. Can't you take responsibility for _anything?_ You always blame me! _Grow up_, Inuyasha!"

The Hanyou felt stung by her bitter words—she so rarely criticized a flaw of his in such harsh tones. Bewildered and a little hurt, he stared back at her with a cross expression. "Why're you being like this, Kagome?"

Her anger drained as she saw through his strong façade into his confused face. "I'm sorry Inuyasha. I don't know what came over me." He smiled, relieved and willing to forget her ugly words. She rarely apologized first.

Looking at his happy face, a wave of hot longing hit her. She found herself wanting to rest in his arms and discover him again for the first time. But she stalled before moving and looked at his features, his hair, his clothing, and his eyes. She felt as if she were looking at Miroku, or Kouga, or any other man. The spark had died out, and she would be feeling the flame's ashes instead of turning towards her future. Gazing at Inuyasha, She thought that she wasn't in love with _him_: she was in love with the _feeling_ of love. '_Would that be using him, if I pretended?'_

Inuyasha notcied her eyes running along his body and made the first move. He stood up, looking intently down at her. "Kagome, I love you." With a hesitant smile he reached up and gently, haltingly, stroked her elegant neck. "I don't want you to be hurt."

Kagome's heart pounded, and she felt like she was swimming in a sea of sluggish sensations and nostaglia. She leaned into him, her hands running all over his back. Greedily, she pressed her curves up against his form and kissed his jaw line. In her mind, Inuyasha was someone else and this was her lover: a different, blank man. He was a warm distraction, with loving hands and sweet words.

They made love for the last time in the firelight. Kagome never did say, 'I love you'.

* * *

Sesshomaru opened the book, and thought of Rin. 

His claws fingered the moonlit pages as he ran over the words fluently. '_Isn't it interesting how humans put words together like that?'_ He was sitting near to the cabin where Kagome and his half-brother slept. They were having sex—he could smell it from his seat beneath a tree near the edge of a clearing. He ignored the scent and read another page.

'_Do humans really preach these values?' _She'd said it was a famous novel, so he assumed that it was widely taught. '_Equality? Surely if a man is stronger, then he is stronger. If one is smarter and one dull, there are two different levels'._ This conception of evening things out interested him. Would he be equal to a human then, in their modern views?

'_Is this what most human females think?'_ The girl in the book wasn't as meek as Rin; still, so many times the character did things that would remind him of his young human. '_Fiction_,' he thought, '_is a world through someone else's view_.' A sudden question sprung to his mind._ 'How did Rin see me?'_ He wondered that for the first time as his eyes trailed over sentences.

'_Are human legal systems always this complicated?'_ He flipped another page quickly. He found himself sympathizing with the children and hoping for certain outcomes. '_Are all fictions designed to make you feel, or is this an exception?'_ Thrill bubbled in his chest as he skimmed over another chapter. He felt as if a new world had opened; one where the sunset brought joy and the rain wept. Emotions held him in the pages.

The book was finished before the sun rose. He was left with a lingering sense of injustice, and a strange longing. He wanted to dive into the words again and again, because everything was so important in the book and his life was so meaningless. He thought of Rin, left in a human village once she'd started to develop. He had the strange urge to track her down and ask her about her thoughts.

Feeling empty in some ways and full in others, he placed the book in the pocket of his pants. He watched the hut beneath the lightening sky. An unfamiliar sense of urgency gripped him: he wanted to find Kagome and ask her more about the book, about fiction, about life as a human. He'd given her a day to mourn. After dawn, he would fetch her. The cabin sat in his line of vision. He could smell the smoke, and below that the scent of stale love.

He ignored his twinge of jealousy and watched the warm colours shimmer on the clouds. For Sesshomaru, that sunrise seemed more vibrant than it had in years.

* * *

A/N- Okay, I may get people asking why Kagome slept with Inuyasha if this is a sesskag fic. Let me just state that Kagome is human. And humans make mistakes. Relationships don't' just 'end', with one party 'bad' and one 'good'. People have too many dimensions, and feelings get mucked up in the mix. This _is_ a Sesshomaru-Kagome story. 

Part of me felt that this chapter was a bit too short, but I think it said everything that was needed.

Oh-- and To Kill a Mockingbird belongs to Harper Lee. I'm not profiting off of this story

Thanks for reading. Please leave a comment/review!


	8. Chapter 8

Kagome felt something warm prodding her arm. She shrugged it off and rolled over beneath the tangled blankets. Her senses were rising from the abyss of sleep. She felt a body curled against hers, the yellow warmth of the fire, and the cold grays of the sky washing over her face. She stretched under the covers and remembered that she was naked. Linking that to the warm skin pressed against her back, she cracked open a bleary eye. Light assaulted her senses, while the thing prodded her arm again. Irritated, she swatted it away.

"Awaken, Kagome. We are departing now." A deep voice floated quietly around her.

Consciousness hit her like a train. Sesshomaru. Her eyes flew open and she stifled a gasp. Inuyasha lay to her side, the blankets rising and falling as he snored lightly in his sleep. Her clammy hands gripped the covers and drew them into her chest. She sat up to face the doorway and saw Sesshomaru casually standing there, dressed in modern clothes. She remembered in a split second what she had to do, and what she had done.

_Inuyasha…_ Guilt sprouted in her gut as she remembered the night before. She recalled his 'I love you's', and she remembered her misleading actions. She felt grimy shame coat her skin. Partly glad that Sesshomaru allowed her an avenue out of the situation, she nodded to him. His eyes flickered between their bodies before he turned around.

He waited outside the hut as she dressed quickly and clumsily. Before leaving she looked at Inuyasha, splayed across the bedding with a contented look on his face. He deserved a goodbye. "Inuyasha?"

The Hanyou's eyelashes fluttered as his eyes snapped open. He gave her a warm, half-asleep look. "Hey Kagome. Why are you dressed?" Love threaded its way through every one of his coarse words.

She saw his devotion and wanted to run away. She dreaded facing her mistake, her wordless lie. Standing frozen before Inuyasha, she burned with guilt. Her feet felt glued to the boards. "Sesshomaru." She said.

Inuyasha's face fell. He sat up in a sad rush of air. "Oh." Habit pushed him to grasp the space where his sword once sat. Kagome was voicelessly begging him not to do anything rash. She shook her head, ruffling her tangled hair. Inuyasha wanted to run his fingers through her knots and straighten them out, one by one. He wished that he could feel her hair, her skin, and her lips forever. But she had to leave, and she didn't want violence. He'd do anything for her—even watch her go. "Keep safe." He felt like a part of his soul was going to desert him and never come back.

"I will." She stood still in the doorway, memorizing him with sad eyes.

"I love you, Kagome." As he threw the words out some part of him hoped that they would tie her to him, so he'd never have to see her walk away. He watched her beautiful face and waited for a response.

"I…" Her words faltered. The fire crackled, the morning birds trilled, and Kagome wanted to cry. She couldn't force this last lie past her lips; she couldn't hurt him again. "I'll miss you." That truth did little to fill the gaping silence where her words should have been. "Goodbye." She turned away before he could respond. She ran, past the snow, the bare trees, and the cold air. She pushed herself until her lungs strained and she had to stop and sit in a silent spot in the woods. There she looked up at the clouds, wispy and gray, woven out of sorrow and the promise of rain. Kagome wept.

* * *

Sesshomaru followed. He saw her collapse onto the ground. Teardrops dripped from her pained face and sunk into the shallow snow. He drifted into her line of vision and sat across from her. He could still smell the remnants of sex littering her body. "What is upsetting you?" He asked. 

Kagome looked up at him with puffy, red eyes. Surprised at his concern, she tried to compose herself. "I don't know." Another wave of tears swamped her. She faced the ground, embarrassed to be seen in such a pathetic position.

"You're mourning the priestess's death?"

She swallowed the lump in her throat and cracked open her dry lips. "Yeah."

Sesshomaru inched closer, until her was only a foot away from her. Kagome watched him curiously. "Kaede was her name?"

"Yes."

He tried to find words of comfort. Unfortunately, having never been comforted before, he wasn't sure of what to say. He thought of the old woman, her spirit grasping onto life as death drained her shell. "It was her time."

Kagome wiped her eyes with the palm of her hand and sat up a little straighter. "That's what she said."

Sesshomaru pictured all the humans of the world rising and falling like the tide; pooling back into the ocean, then splashing out in a burst of light and life. He saw them live and die, born from each other's flesh in the blink of an eye. He saw the cycle. "She is right. Death is inevitable."

"Even yours?"

No--he stood alone and watched the world turn. Sunsets flew over the clouds as the cycle repeated over and over, year after year. "Not mine." On some days, he wished he could dive in.

Kagome observed the Taiyoukai seated close to her. Even within arm's reach, he seemed distant. His eyes were still, focused steadily on her face. No emotions were there: he seemed like an empty and beautiful doll, wandering forever with bored, glassy eyes. She saw Kaede's last moment playing over and over in her head, and wondered if he envied the old woman. "How long will you live?" She asked.

"Until I kill myself."

Her eyes flew wide open and settled on Sesshomaru's calm face. "Kill yourself?"

"Did you not hear?"

She looked down at the snow, and the frail grass buried underneath. "I heard."

Sesshomaru peered at his hands. He didn't often look at his body, and he wasn't surprised by what he saw. Flawless, elegant fingers tapered down into a smooth palm. No wrinkles crossed his perfect skin—the skin he'd had since the cusp of adulthood. Once he'd reached the appearance of someone in their twentieth year, he'd simply stopped aging. Time would not kill him; he would never die a natural death. "Sickness may strike." The scent of his mother's rotting body filled his nose. "It is rare though; it kills only a couple demons a millennia. I am too strong for it to injure me."

"How do you know?" Kagome asked, all thoughts of Inuyasha temporarily forgotten.

His gaze flickered away from her open face. He looked instead at the distant landscape: the light dusting of snow lying atop skeletal branches, forming jagged black and white patterns against the foggy air. "When I was young, a disease infected our castle. I had a mild fever—nothing more. It killed most adult demons within days. To my knowledge, I am the strongest demon in this era."

She wondered what it would be like--that feeling of invincibility. "Do you like it? Living for so long, I mean."

Sesshomaru shrugged his heavy shoulders. "I have not known anything else."

"I suppose not." She paused, looking over his beautiful skin and deadly claws. "I'd love to be able to be that important."

He saw her wistful gaze following the lines of his body. "Do you fear the time before you were born?" His question came out in a smooth, planned manner; but he had asked it in a spur-of-the-moment urge to reassure the human.

She tried not to seem confused. "No. Of course not."

"Then why do you fear what will arrive after death?"

Kagome sat still for a few breaths, considering his words. She didn't know why she feared it. "You don't understand." Her life was falling towards… what? Was it the _not knowing_ that drove people to cry out in nightmares? "It's because I don't know…" Her mind's logical side faltered, unable to rearrange this human puzzle into something manageable, speakable. Her thoughts twisted into a black knot in her mouth, so she settled for not trying to explain it at all. "You aren't human. You can't understand."

He didn't. All of his life he'd seen death strike his lands, while he stood stoically and remembered his curse. The 'could' was torture. _'I could use Tensaiga, I could...'_ But it failed every time, and he walked alone with his burden. But then--she didn't see it as a curse, did she? "You do not understand either." She wouldn't live long enough to watching him wander forever.

Neither understood. So Sesshomaru switched the topic to something he could grasp.. "You slept with my half-brother."

Her problems came crashing down onto her. She closed off her body: arms crossed, back curled, head tilted down, legs twisted together. "I did." The Taiyoukai pulled the truth from her with his honest, strong statements. Cornered, she sat and dreaded his inevitable disgust and rejection. She didn't question why she cared about what he thought.

"Why?"

The question left her a bit relieved. Sesshomaru would dig deeper into her motives—he wouldn't judge, not right away. "I missed him."

Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes, as if he saw the half-truth she was feeding him. "Did you?"

Kagome's head lifted up. A new—or perhaps old—determination filled her. She was going to get through this. Inuyasha would heal, she would heal, and they would laugh about sex in thirty years, when he was new and she was falling apart. "I missed parts of him." _This mistake won't last forever. _"His reassurance, I missed." _Always a light at the end of the tunnel._ "And his touch, really, also." _It's going to be okay. _"I miss what he gave me." The truth fell onto the snow, and Kagome saw it with sad eyes. "I loved his love… not him." _Can you miss something you've never had?_

"You used him." The sterile words broke Kagome's self-assuring mantras. She'd used him. Suddenly, she wanted to scratch at her guilty, _wrong_ skin until it all peeled away and she was left clean, fresh and pure.

"I have used women." Sesshomaru stated, free of any emotion.

Kagome wasn't surprised. '_Would he be that detached in bed_,' she wondered. '_Or would he pretend?'_ "You don't feel guilt?"

Sesshomaru's empty eyes trialed over her curves, barely visible beneath layers of clothing and crossed arms. "It was a mutual exchange. We shared physical pleasures. Emotions are their own. I am not responsible for what other's think."

"Oh." So he was free of guilt. "You don't regret _anything_, then?"

"I regret. A gift, though, is not something to dwell on." He swooped up, out of the snow. Standing before her, he offered his hand. "Inuyasha was thankful?"

She took up on his offer to help her up, relieved that he was still willing to touch her stained skin. "Yes, he was grateful."

They were close to the well, so they started walking towards it. Sesshomaru seemed to sense that Kagome _wanted_ to go home and escape. "If he was thankful, you have given him something."

Kagome sloshed through the damp snow. A few powdery flakes floated down from the sky. "But he gave me so much more…" _I love you, Kagome. _Inuyasha's words ran through her mind. _I love you..._

"He was _willing_ to give you his love. You are not responsible for what he throws away."

She wondered if love was another thing that Sesshomaru couldn't grasp. She'd never realized before how _human_ Inuyasha was in comparison to his brother. Sesshomaru seemed on a different plane altogether. "I don't know what to think." She said. The cold air surrounded her, and she wished that she'd brought a heavier jacket. Her face was freezing, her hand was icy. Just one palm though; she looked down to see Sesshomaru's beautiful hand still holding her own. Both embarrassed and flattered, she quickly untangled her fingers. He didn't react.

"If you do not know what to think…" Sesshomaru thought of the book in his pocket, the girl at his side, and the world contained in a tiny, wooden well. "Accept it. And try to understand."

Kagome looked at the demon by her side, marching with long, light strides. The cover-up had mostly flaked off; his marks seemed like shadows of what they once were. His thick eyelashes trembled with each step, and for a moment she was absorbed in his beauty. The fact that this powerful, nearly immortal creature was willingly walking next to her filled her with a strange sort of pride. She tried not to think about how hideous she must be in comparison.

They arrived at well: her escape, her problems, her freedom and her fate squished into one endless dark hole. Feet lifted off of the snow and trailed puddles onto splintering wood. He stood on the rim and watched her fall into the blackness.

* * *

"I had a child, once." 

Sesshomaru's confession surprised Kagome so much that she nearly slipped and cut her hand. Repositioning the carrot, she started chopping again. She held her breath and waited for him to continue.

"She was a human girl." He followed her uneven cuts with his eyes while he spoke. "I didn't want her at first."

The fact that the child was human startled Kagome again; she jerked her attention away from the knife flashing under her fingertips. Sesshomaru marched to her side from his seat at the kitchen table. Wordlessly, he stole the knife from her hands and brushed her aside. Leaning over the cutting board, he paused while Kagome lingered at his side. "You may sit. I will cut the vegetables."

She obeyed with a smile and a 'thank you.'

"You will remove an appendage if you continue." He swiftly diced up a carrot for the stew. Kagome had promised she'd prepare dinner for her family. Reluctantly, they'd been herded into the family room to wait for her specialty: a bunch of random vegetables thrown into boiling water. It was an excuse to spend some time alone and deal with the events of the previous day. Sesshomaru, however, wasn't willing to detach himself from her side. She watched him rinse another carrot, and decided that it wasn't all that bad.

"I was injured when she came upon me." His hair swished from side to side with the movements of his arms above the counter. He stood near to the sink, straight-backed in his pale sweater. "Inuyasha had… well I'm sure you recall that fight."

She watched the blade demolish another carrot. "How long did it take for your arm to grow back?"

"Two years, perhaps two and a half." He pushed the solid orange chunks over to the side and plucked a few mushrooms out of a brown paper bag. An assortment of plants lay sprawled along the countertop. "The child," he continued, "Offered me food. She was so naïve that I couldn't bring myself to harm her. So I ignored her." The blue evening light spilled through the window and flooded the small room. His skin and hair seemed whiter in the twilight; he looked ethereal and out of place next to the sink and fridge. He smiled a little as he fingered a potato. "She was dead, the next time I saw her."

"Dead?" Kagome was sure that she wasn't hearing him right. Either that or he was lying, which he never really did.

"Yes. Quite dead." He shaved a potato while gazing out the window. "I was standing over her body—it was a mess—and Tenseiga pulsed."

"The sword tha—"

He glanced at her, a bit impatiently. "Yes. The one my father left to me." The sound of a knife hitting the cutting board filled the room. "I withdrew and used it." Sesshomaru paused and set down the knife. He jerked up the sleeves of his shirt then commenced chopping, with his forearms exposed. "The child was alive. She followed me for four years."

"Were you like her father, then?"

"No. I don't know what I was to her."

Kagome fixed her eyes on his arms descending up and down in a steady rhythm. A few veins were visible, trailing down silky skin to his wrist. Muscles flexed with each motion. "What was the girl to you?"

"A curiosity. She was different." One vegetable remained. Before Kagome could warn him, he cut straight through the layers of flaky beige skin. Immediately he dropped the knife and backed away from it. "You eat _that_?" He asked, revolted. He covered the lower half of his face with his hand.

"Yup." She swiftly arrived at his side and took over dicing the vegetable. "It's called an onion."

Sesshomaru's eyes were watering. Looking like he was trying not to gag, he strode away from the smell to sit at the table. "Her name was Rin." He continued.

Kagome thought that he had a habit of spilling his secrets at the oddest of times. "Where is she now?" She hoped that Sesshomaru wouldn't say anything grotesque.

"I left her at a human household when she started to mature. I did not want an adolescent with me."

She dropped the chopped vegetables into the pot and flicked on the heat. "Why?"

"I did not want to become attached."

Kagome cleared away the peelings and cores. She then wiped her hands on her jeans and sauntered over to join Sesshomaru at the table. He wrinkled his nose, and she remembered that to him she must reek of onions. She retreated to wash her hands self-consciously. "Why didn't you want to become attached? Do you mean romantically?"

He didn't answer right away, and Kagome wondered if it was a stupid question. "Not romantically. Generally, I did not want to be dependant on Rin."

"Why?" She asked again.

"She is human."

That sparked Kagome's fury: the reminder that Sesshomaru held this nonsensical, immature prejudice. She twirled around and stalked over to him, hands dripping. "And what is wrong with being human?" She frowned and waited for his response.

Sesshomaru looked into her angry eyes, sadness shining through his gaze. "They die."

"Oh." Kagome felt like the biggest moron. Had she misjudged him? She realized that his long lifespan was a double-edged sword; she saw him trudging through life forever, denied the right to a natural death, and denied the right to grow old with companions. '_How many people has he watched fade away?'_ For a moment Kagome pitied the invincible demon, alone carrying his gift and his curse.

"The water is boiling."

Kagome turned to watch over the stew and set the table. Sesshomaru reminded himself that even though Rin would be dead in his near future, _'She was with me then. That is what maters.' _He told himself that, as dinner was served and the family talked. '_She was with me then'_, while the plates were cleaned and her brother left. He told himself that all night, while Kagome slept soundly in her room. He almost believed it.

* * *

A/N -- Special thanks goes out to Rejhan and Naien, for being such loyal reviewers. Thanks to Nilee too, for bringing Rin into the story. Because I've reformatted the chapters, people who've already reviewed earlier may not be able to do so again (not until chapter 10, anyway.) Sorry to those who've tried! Just review anonymously if it's not working for you. 

As always, comments/ suggestions/ compliments are welcome.


	9. Chapter 9

"We built this city!"

'_What is this?'_

"We built this city on rock and roll!"

'_It's hideous!'_

"We built this city!"

'_Where is that button?'_

"We built—"

Sesshomaru ejected the disk. He wondered if humans were regressing. _'Do they play violins anymore?'_

With a low sigh, the demon turned to stare at Tokyo's lights, blinking on and off like multicoloured fireflies. He had the urge to bound away from his spot on a frozen hill, towards the energy of a city heated with neon signs and flashy cars. He restrained his longing and sat still in place. Snowflakes fell gently onto his body, melting when it made contact with his warm flesh. He felt icy water seep into his pants. The chill touched his skin; though it didn't 'sting' the way humans describe it. _'What would it be like to feel winter's frost?'_

He picked apart the city's noise from his perch near the sky. There were car tires that screeched sharply, layered on top of millions of human voices that crashed onto one another to form a low hum. Below them the electrical buzz of sky rises thrummed. The frantic atmosphere below invigorated him. He felt restless: he wanted to let his dog form take over and run through forests. He wasn't sure which body was his own, and which was the disguise. He just knew that living in this artificial world was uncomfortable and unnatural. There weren't even any animals, save for the birds and squirrels. He could sense the earth dying. The air, it was… off. Sickness surrounded him everywhere. Perhaps the demons had fled, knowing that humans would advance so fast that the earth couldn't catch up.

Another plane pushed slowly through the sky overhead. Its lights blinked on and off like red stars. _'Can they build stars, now?'_ But Kagome said that the twinkling orbs were suns, each one of them. A hundred questions unfolded as his eyes looked at the giant, white-speckled dome looming above him.

Beside him sat CD's and cases, a small book, and a gun. Such different things: art and war. _'Humans are truly complicated creatures.'_ He spent the night thinking about the new era. At those times—when the boughs of the trees danced in the moonlight—Sesshomaru felt that only the wind and clouds understood him. How lonely it was, to spend half your life awake in the dark. Even Rin used to crawl into sleep and desert him when the daylight dimmed.

'_She is dead now, in this time.'_ He didn't see what that thought accomplished. Still, it sprung to his mind and wouldn't leave. '_Would Tensaiga work, if I found her grave?'_ No—she would be too far gone. How did his father manage to live for so long? Sesshomaru thought that he must have eventually accepted absolutely everything. How does one live with the world, the unfairness of it all? _'First,' _Sesshomaru reasoned every day, _'One must understand it.' _So the Taiyoukai would sit and think every night, trying to find peace: the one thing death brings, and life steals away. He caught glimpses of it in the billowing clouds; he saw rest in the rivers' black currents. He could not break apart and join them, like Rin had done so long ago. He was separate.

Sesshomaru watched the sun peek over the horizon, and almost joined it. Something, though, held him back from taking that final leap. The sense that something was _off_ tingled within him, as it had since he'd arrived in that era. He felt the urge to stay and correct whatever was wrong. Breathing in the dark wind, he asked himself why the thought of suicide didn't seem _right_. Something bound him to this life; he wanted to find out what it was.

* * *

Kagome awoke with a sharp, stabbing ache in her stomach. She sat up in bed and gingerly probed it with her Miko powers. A hot tingle ripped through her fingertips and buried itself in the painful area. A warm, pulsing glow curled from her belly outwards. She smiled in pride—it had worked, for once—and then stood up to get dressed.

Only the pressure was still there. It had faded into a small tug, but it was present nonetheless. _'But I felt it heal me…'_ It was probably anxiety. She hoped that it wasn't a premonition. _'Stop worrying—it's all in your head.' _As far as she knew, her abilities didn't stretch to heal mental ailments. That area was reserved for older, experienced priestesses—like Kaede.

Kagome frowned and pressed onward with her morning. Even after she'd showered and dressed, the sickly feeling hadn't left.

"Good morning sweetie!" Her mother hugged her tightly in the kitchen. Considering all the perils her daughter had survived, every day with her seemed a blessing. Each morning was a step towards the day when the final battle would be over.

Kagome let the woman crush her before heading over to the fridge. "Hey mom." She plucked an apple out of the drawer and wiped it across her cotton t-shirt. "Where's Sesshomaru?"

Ms. Higurashi set the kettle on the burner with a metallic 'clack'. "I haven't seen him. I assumed he left for his time." She paused, arm in a cupboard, and looked at her daughter. "He's quite handsome, you know."

Kagome choked on an apple chunk. "I know." She could feel herself blushing.

Her mother gave her a knowing smile before turning to prepare breakfast. "He may be in the yard."

Kagome rushed into the foyer with an aggravated sigh. She shuffled into her shoes, and then swung open the door.

"For god sakes Kagome, wear your coat!" A voice rang out from the kitchen.

The girl rolled her eyes while shrugging a heavy jacket onto her shoulders. "I am, mom!" She slammed the door shut.

"Bye Kagome!" Her daughter didn't respond, and Ms. Higurashi suddenly felt abandoned. Alone, she turned on the kettle. Souta would awake soon; she fixed her mind on preparing the boy's meal. She didn't want to dwell on Kagome--not when she was still in danger. _'She will return one day,'_ the mother thought, _'and it will be over.'_ The house's silence pressed against her aging body. _'She will come home.'_

_

* * *

_

Bits of snow flew ahead of Kagome's sneakers as she kicked through the wet powder. Sesshomaru sat ahead, beside the trail falling towards the street. She grumbled to herself—why should _she_ have to go out and fetch _him?_ He didn't even acknowledge her presence as she stood behind his body. "I _know_ you know I'm here." She frowned at his back.

Sesshomaru watched fog and chemicals spill out of factories. Morning rush-hour traffic honked below, inching across cracked asphalt. The fumes from the automobiles rose into the brisk air. "Your species is ruining the planet."

'_Good morning to you too_,' Kagome thought. Sesshomaru didn't elaborate on his statement; he sat still, his face turned towards the rising sun._ 'What is he always looking at?'_ She peered at the geometric apartments: gray rectangles against the morning sky. The sun's rays reflected off their windows, creating golden fuzz radiating off of each pane of glass. To her, it seemed a pretty scene. "What do you want to do today?"

"Research."

Kagome sulked, grinding her foot into the snow. "On what?"

"The planet's state of health, medicinal technologies, history, visual arts, and poetry. I also wish to acquire more stories." His hand gestured to the book, half-buried in snow.

She bent down and brushed off the cover. The cold froze her fingers; she pulled her hands away from the ground abruptly. She didn't expect Sesshomaru to reach towards her red digits. The warmth of his skin surprised Kagome; she twitched a little in shock. He brushed snowflakes off of her hand gently, and then let his arm rest in his lap. Her thoughts fluttering around, she set her eyes on the solid purple cover. "So you've finished it already?"

"Yes."

"How did you like it?"

Sesshomaru gathered the CD's in his long arms in one fluid motion. He rose up and started walking towards the house. Kagome noticed that he left the gun in the snow. "Parts." He answered.

She jogged behind him, wincing as the motions sent a twinge of pain through her gut. She saw that his pants were soaking wet, and it struck her as sad. He didn't seem like himself in modern clothing. "Which parts did you like?"

"I liked the children." He opened the front door. "Their views were refreshing. Your society is entirely too complicated."

Kagome paused in front of the entranceway. "Why are we here? I thought you wanted to go to the library."

Sesshomaru scratched the half-eaten apple in her hand with one sharp claw. "So that you could eat a fulfilling meal."

"Oh." She shrugged and kicked off her shoes. "Thanks."

He would have retorted with an I-don't-want-my-guide-to-starve speech, but she was already loudly flipping cupboard doors open and shut. He frowned at the noise and followed her, intent on making sure she eat regularly. A flicker of importance warmed him as he entered the kitchen.

* * *

Sesshomaru was agitated and restless. He was standing behind Kagome, arms crossed, as she pulled another art book off of a shelf. The library didn't seem to be busy on weekends; the section was nearly deserted.

"Do you like impressionism?" She yanked out another book and plopped in on top of a growing pile.

"I do not know 'impressionism."

Kagome forced a smile to surface. "Well, here's your chance to learn about it!" She straightened out the books on the table before glaring at Sesshomaru expectantly. "Aren't you going to take a look?" She pulled out a chair. It scraped lightly against the carpeted floor; Sesshomaru frowned at the sound. Kagome pursed her lips together and forced herself to act calmly. The Taiyoukai had been in a foul mood ever since they'd left for the library. Add that to her mysterious, ever-present stomach-ache, and Kagome wasn't having the best afternoon.

Sesshomaru uncrossed his arms and cocked his head lightly to the side. "What _is_ that?"

Kagome collapsed on a soft chair. "What?" She peered at him, frowning in exasperation.

He pressed his hand against the soft material of his shirt, a few centimeters below his belly-button. "An unpleasant feeling." He drew his eyebrows together and prodded his stomach. "It has not left." Curling up his shirt, he inspected the expanse of smooth, pale skin. Nothing appeared out of the ordinary with his flesh; it was, as everything about him seemed to be, perfect.

"I've had that since this morning." Kagome tried to look into his eyes; not at the abdominal muscles lying beneath his fingertips. She crossed her legs and faced him, resting an elbow on the cold tabletop. "You've never had a stomach ache?"

Sesshomaru lowered his shirt elegantly, and then seated himself across from Kagome. He pushed aside hardcover books obscuring his view of the human. "I have not eaten recently, nor have I undergone strenuous activity. I am neither poisoned nor injured."

"When I was younger, I used to get them all the time. Sometimes I'd wake up in pain and I'd know that something bad would happen that day." Kagome looked down at her hands. "Kaede used to say that it was a sign of my Miko powers. She'd say that all people can sense catastrophe; I just happen to be more sensitive to it than others. I hope nothing awful will happen today—the last time I felt this anxious was when I got pulled into the well."

Sesshomaru reached for an art book. "But I am not a Miko."

"No, you're not." She shrugged self-consciously. "Perhaps I'm getting carried away with things. You probably just have a bug."

He opened it up to a random page. "I do not own insects." He rotated the book onto its side, peering at the colourful lines splattered onto the pages. "And this is not art."

"When people say 'you have a bug' it mean's you're sick. You do have parasites, though, all in your intestines." He shot her a disgusted look. "Or maybe it's a human thing. Anyway, just forget it." She squinted at the book. "And that is art. It's by a famous painter named Pollock."

He flipped over the page and frowned again. "That is just colours. I could paint like this, if given the proper equipment."

Kagome sifted through the sloppy columns of books until she found a more conventional painting style. "Aha!" She yanked out the book. As a result, four hardcovers wobbled on the table's edge before crashing noisily into the floor. A white blur flew past her feet; a seconds later the books were stacked neatly on the floor. Sesshomaru had returned calmly to his seat, not a hair ruffled by his sudden movement. Kagome smiled in thanks; he ignored it, choosing instead to steal the book out of her hands.

He flipped straight to the middle of the book. "_This_ is art." He sat still, absorbed in the page.

"It's a famous painting: "Starry Night."

The demon thought of all the nights he sat alone, enveloped in the dark. "And the artist saw the sky like this?"

"How else would he paint it? Actually he was pretty crazy. He cut his ear off! Imagine that. He was in a hospital…" She trailed off when she realized he'd tuned out.

Sesshomaru flipped over the page. The next painting was of a wheat field, the rows jagged in the wind's pull. Above the field, a dark sky held a few birds. The entire picture was warped and twisted; the wheat and sky were distorted into odd angles and unnatural curves. A wave of anxiety swept over the Taiyoukai as he looked over the painting. Something seemed… _off_ again, as if things didn't quite match up the way they should have. The nervous feeling worsened in his stomach. He shut the book with a 'snap'.

"What's wrong?"

He swallowed; a lump had suddenly formed in his throat. He was silent.

"What? Do you feel sick?"

Panic rippled through him; he felt suddenly caged in, trapped in a twisted world. "No." He could smell the earth dying…

"What can I do?" She was standing over him, a hand on his stiff shoulder.

He closed his eyes. "Something is wrong with your era."

"What do you mean?"

His anxious haze cleared a bit. He blinked and straightened his back. "Don't you feel it? The wrongness? It's in the air, Kagome."

She pressed her palm against his forehead: no fever. Worried about the Taiyoukai, she tried to smile reassuringly. "Nothing's wrong."

He twisted his head; his clear eyes bored into hers. His gaze unnerved her—it was calm and collected. How could he be so _normal_ and saying such crazy things? "Your abdomen hurts." He stated.

She nodded. "Yes, it does."

"Then you can sense it. Something is wrong."

The dull ache wavered with his words. She used her Miko powers on the air itself, testing it. A nervous shock ran through her system: something _was _off. Suddenly nothing seemed _right_: the walls were too metallic, the desk was too chemical, and the air was stale and cold. "I see what you mean." _'Why have I never noticed this before?'_

Sesshomaru seemed to have recovered from his sudden onset of fear. He stood up, straight and tall, and peered out across rows of books. "The earth is dying." His sturdy voice was emotionless.

Kagome stood close to him; she felt safe in his presence, protected from the evils of the modern era. "Yeah. We're killing it, I guess. I've read the articles."

"There are so many beautiful parts. Art, books, music." He saw, in his mind, the paintings scattered and rotting on a dead planet. He felt the urge to covet all the world's beauty and save it from destruction. But then, what good is art when there's no one to look at it?

"It's best not to think about it." She shoved that nagging, anxious feeling away from her train of thought. "Just enjoy what you have." She forgot that Sesshomaru would undoubtedly stay long enough to see humans poison the rivers and air, until they could no longer sustain themselves.

They stood side by side in the library, surrounded by the hum of a heating system and the turning of pages. They felt the earth's last cry before being swallowed by human waste. Kagome opened her mouth to speak, but froze before a word could escape.

Jewel shards. It was an unmistakable sensation: a warm, tingly pull on their minds. Her stomach twisted into a nervous knot. "Do you feel it?" She asked.

"Yes." The library continued turning pages.

The feeling increased until it beat steadily in her, the rhythm of magic. "Why is it so strong?" She breathed.

"Perhaps, the shards are all in one place."

In a split second Kagome's nervous feeling made sense. Without a word Sesshomaru lifted Kagome and dashed out of the building. The final battle had begun.

* * *

A/N--Thanks for your support. I appreciate feedback of any sort. 


	10. Chapter 10

Naraku laughed. With a sickening 'snap' he lashed out at Inuyasha, tearing another deep gash into his skin. The hanyou staggered at the blow; he barely had enough time to catch his breath before a tentacle flew past his chest. Inuyasha lurched forwards clumsily. Every movement tore at his injuries. The wounds varied from minor lacerations to gaping chasms. Blood leaked from his worn body and formed a speckled trail atop the pure snow.

"You're going down, Naraku." He panted as he tried to slash the demon with Sesshomaru's sword. He wished for tetsusaiga's strength more than anything; unfortunately the sword was a world away, tucked safely into his half-brother's abandoned armour.

Sango held tightly onto just three jewel pieces. She'd managed to pull them out of Kagome's backpack seconds before Naraku had arrived. She sheltered the fragments with all her strength, as wave after wave of minions assaulted her. Kirara fought bravely by her side. Sango slipped on a wet patch of mud, recovering with enough time to duck an insect's poison sting. She closed her fist around the glassy shards and vowed, with all of her strength, not to let go of them until death. The bodies of minor demons started to pile around the tired demon slayer.

Miroku lay at the base of a tree, his body eerily still. He hadn't wanted to use his wind tunnel; he feared injuring his friends. So he'd beaten at the enemies with his staff--an ineffective weapon against such hardened foes. Shippo prodded his body with a hesitant finger, crying openly. The fox knew that his paltry flames were no match for Naraku's strength. Instead of joining Inuyasha and Sango's fight, he tried to revive the monk.

The cold winter sun beat down on Naraku's smiling face. He thought of the few fragments he'd need to complete his wish. The Hanyou before him staggered again; he lashed out, slicing another opening in the boy's flesh. Triumph rose in his chest as Inuyasha slowly died.

* * *

Sesshomaru heard Kagome's gasp as he surveyed the battle with calm eyes. The first thing he saw was his brother, stained with blood and waving _his_ sword at Naraku. A tentacle shot out from Naraku's robes; Inuyasha missed, swinging straight past it. The hanyou was obviously unfamiliar with the length, weight, and feel of Sesshomaru's weapon. The Taiyoukai set the frightened girl gently down on a snow bank, and then dashed towards his brother. Inuyasha would live, after all.

* * *

His sword was ripped out of his hands. At first, Inuyasha thought that Naraku had stopped toying with him and landed a killing blow. But he was still alive--weak, but alive. Stunned, he saw a pale blur crash into Naraku with such force that the earth shook and the clouds trembled. Sesshomaru had arrived.

Naraku reeled with surprise at the Taiyoukai's sudden attack. He roared to full strength and retaliated. The two demons crashed through the trees. The forest wavered beneath their power. Inuyasha limped out of the battle, towards Sango. The weakening slayer was struggling to ward off demons. Kirara saw her pained friend, and cried out in fury. Even hurt, Inuyasha quickly dispatched herds of insects with his bare claws. A few grueling minutes later the trio stood alone. In the distant sky, white and black blurs fought amongst the clouds.

"Thanks." Sango said. She let her boomerang fall to the ground. "The shards." She smiled wearily and pointed to Kagome. The Miko was kneeling at Miroku's side, encased in a ball of pink energy. A sharp pang of fear struck her chest as she watched the monk's still body. "Tell Kagome I have the shards." Her white fist uncurled to reveal three jewel fragment, digging into her flesh. "Naraku can't get them, Inuyasha."

"I know." He plucked the fragments out of Sango's hands. The pair jogged over to Kagome, Miroku and Shippo. Kirara lagged behind them. They paused before her, not wishing to interrupt her spiritual session. Inuyasha could have laughed at that moment--the shards didn't matter, Naraku didn't matter, Sesshomaru didn't matter. Nothing mattered but the girl in front of him. _'Do you love me?'_ His Kagome was home.

* * *

The Miko felt it: her center, the sea of calm in between her fleeting thoughts. _'Pull it out, twist it, channel it...'_ She pressed her fingers against Miroku's cool forehead. His head lay in her lap. She closed her eyes, and tried to think of only the energy pouring from her body to his. _'Heal him.'_ She felt a warm tingle climb up her fingertips.

The monk's eyelids fluttered. Slowly, he opened his eyes and saw Kagome's face leering over his.

"Miroku, who am I?" she asked in a loud, clear voice.

"Kagome."

She smiled, relieved. "And who are you?"

Her blinked in confusion. "Miroku. Why are you asking me these questions? Go help Inuyasha."

"I'm here," a gravelly voice answered. Miroku felt Kagome' lap slip out from under his head. Sango's hands steadied him, positioning him upright. He felt a lingering blanket of warmth comfort his body. He saw Kagome and Inuyasha embracing, and beyond them the hazy outlines of battling demons. "Where's Naraku?"

Sango helped the monk to his feet. She wrapped her hand around his. "Sesshomaru and Kagome came." They turned to watch the fight.

Kagome picked Shippo so he could get a better view. She felt the jewel shards lying in her pocket. "What if Sesshomaru doesn't win?" She asked out loud.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. He eased himself down onto the snow, a small pool of blood forming underneath his feat. Already his injuries were closing up. "He'll win. I mean, he's stronger than me, right?"

"Inuyasha, would you like me to try and heal you?" Kagome spoke without taking her eyes off of the sun-streaked demons hovering above treetops.

The Hanyou shook his head. "I'll be fine."

Kagome frowned but didn't argue.

The monk, demon slayer, kitsune, Miko, and Hanyou watched Sesshomaru dance with death. They held their breath and followed the demons with wide eyes. For once, Inuyasha prayed that his brother would triumph. The fate of the world rested on Sesshomaru's blade.

* * *

Tensaiga sliced through the air, inches away from Naraku's flesh. Sesshomaru dodged a close attack and struck out again, missing for a second time. A few small cuts stung as he swung the heavy sword. Naraku had sustained a few minor injuries as well, but he wasn't even panting. They were evenly matched.

Naraku forced a smile to surface. "Your power isn't nearly as strong as it's rumored to be." He ducked a particularly fast stab of the sword. "You don't nearly match you father."

Sesshomaru landed on a tree branch, then vaulted upwards. He caught Naraku's arm with a twisting motion of his sword. "You have never fought my father, half-breed."

"Oh, but I've heard the legends." The dark demon ripped the fabric of Sesshomaru's sweater, missing his flesh by a hair. "It's unfortunate that such a strong demon could not produce offspring with even half his strength."

Golden eyes faded to red. Sesshomaru bared his fangs in rage. "I am not my father." White fur sprouted over his body. "I never claimed to be my father." He could hear his bones grinding and rearranging; he could feel his organs shift. "I am Sesshomaru." He was towering above Naraku, dripping with acid. The elegant man had transformed into a horrifying beast. Naraku hid his trepidation by launching an attack at the dog's thick fur. Sesshomaru knocked him away with one swipe of his paw.

Naraku flew hundreds of feet, eventually landing beneath a canopy of twisted branches. Fear shone in his dark eyes; he knew that he was no match for the great demon in that form, even with the aid of a nearly-completed jewel shard. "Kanna," he summoned in desperation.

Tree trunks shook as Sesshomaru galloped towards Naraku's body. In front of him stood a small girl. He paused in confusion--why would Naraku's offspring appear so vulnerable? What was she hiding? The girl looked up at him with blank eyes, devoid of fear--or any expression for that matter. Her white skin and hair were nearly invisible against the snow; she seemed to be two great eyes, pools of nothingness swallowing him in. She produced something shiny: a mirror. It flickered in the yellow sunlight. Sesshomaru looked into the glass, and saw his soul.

It was old yet strong, pure white with silver threads. It wavered and shimmered, and seemed to have a life of its own. Pink light streaked through it; the gray and rose toned twisted with one another. He felt it being pulled, pulled out of his body. His mind faltered, and a hollow pang stuck his heart. Soon he would be free of a soul; free of pain, of apathy, of thought. Isn't that what he wanted? In that moment--while watching his future fall into the hands of an empty being--Sesshomaru felt a wave of denial so strong the girl's grip on the mirror faltered. _'I want to live.'_

His heart broke as Kanna drew his life out of him. It would have been easier if she were sad, or angry, or happy, or sick. But she was nothing. There couldn't be a _reason _then: It simply _was_. He felt that his inevitable death was one thing he wasn't ready to accept. It was _unfair_, to live so long and suffer so much for _nothing. _So he protested and fought and silently strained, while his soul continued to seep out of him. Naraku was standing beside the girl with a smirk on his face.

The ground shook. Before she could finish her task, earth opened up and swallowed Kanna whole. A circular chasm had opened up beneath her feet, with a great rumble and a sudden gust of wind. The empty girl had silently fallen into the black depths. Sesshomaru breathed in the frosted air; it was fresh and sharp, and filled him with a rise of hope. He'd found his soul again. No longer trembling with fury, he shrunk down to his human form. He was completely nude: the transformation had ripped the weak human fabrics to pieces. Aware of his nakedness, he followed Naraku's gaze into the hole in the ground. The opening was filled with an eerie, blue-tinted light. A woman rose up out of the chasm. She was beautiful: long dark hair, thick black eyelashes, smooth skin and shimmering brown eyes. Sesshomaru knew the woman: she was Inuyasha's former lover. "Kikyo." He acknowledged. The fight seemed to be momentarily suspended.

The priestess turned towards Sesshomaru. Her actions were smooth and graceful; her chin was held high in dignity. "You aren't clothed." Her face was blank.

"Obviously."

She shrugged, uninterested, and turned her attention over to Naraku. "Onigumo. I though you'd be dead by now."

Naraku frowned bitterly. "Why do you say that?"

"Sesshomaru is a formidable opponent." She didn't state it as a compliment--it was a callous fact. "I wish for your jewel shards."

The demon stepped back. "No!" He tried to strike her; she effortlessly erected a glowing barrier.

"If you are so uncooperative, I fear my kindness to you was in vain." A flash of blue light blinded Sesshomaru. When he next opened his eyes, Naraku was dead on the forest floor. Kikyo had purified the tainted demon. The priestess was far more powerful the he'd imagined. "May I borrow your sword?" Kikyo asked.

Sesshomaru retrieved it from the ground, a few meters away. He handed it to her politely.

"Thank you." The priestess bent down and lifted one of Naraku's hands. She severed it at the wrist in one clean swipe. The stench of blood leaked into the air. Calmly, Kikyo peeled away layers of flesh until a glowing pink clump of shards was visible. With a bloody squelch, she extracted the jewel. She carelessly discarded the hand beside Naraku's body. Her eyes never strayed from the Taiyoukai's face. "You may don his robes if you wish, Sesshomaru."

He quickly tugged the deep blue kimono off of Naraku's corpse. Frowning in disgust, he slipped into the silky fabric. "Why do you wish for the shards?"

The priestess seemed sad for a moment, as she held the jewel's power in the palm of her hand. "I do not. They are not mine to use. I will give them to Kagome—the safekeeping of the jewel is her duty, now."

Sesshomaru nodded. "Why are you here, then?"

Kikyo started walking towards Inuyasha's party. "My reasons are my own."

He followed behind her, the bottom of the robes trailing overtop blood-soaked snow. "You wish for my half-brother, do you not?"

She ignored his question. In silence, they walked back to the others.

* * *

The battle, from their point of view, was over. The enormous silver dog had shrunk, and they could not see what lay beneath the trees. They waited in tense silence. Minutes passed. Shippo clung to Kagome's arms as they watched the sky for sign of a victorious demon. Startled, Inuyasha sucked in air; his eyes darted around the landscape.

"Who is it?" Kagome asked. Sango stroked Kirara's fur softly in the short silence. They all prayed: _'Sesshomaru. Please be Sesshomaru.'_

Inuyasha turned towards a clump of dry hedges and cracked trees. "Kikyo."

"What?" Kagome asked loudly.

Inuyasha had no time to reply—two figures had popped out from behind the trees. One was a great demon lord, the other a priestess. Kikyo stopped advancing once she saw Inuyasha. She didn't smile—she simply paused and stared at the group. A cool breeze played with tendrils of her glossy hair, and Inuyasha remembered how beautiful she was. "Hello Inuyasha." She spoke with a low voice.

The Hanyou stepped ahead of Kagome, towards the dead woman. "Kikyo." He stood before her and shakily stroked her cheek; her cold, pale skin. Only the priestess didn't respond with affection; she simply continued staring sadly at his face. At the moment Inuyasha throught of Kikyo, as she was before death. _She_ would have smiled calmly and embraced him. _This_ woman, she was not the same. He stepped back a pace.

Kikyo looked towards Kagome. "The battle is over, Miko." She slid over the human girl. "You will guard the jewel."

Kagome followed the line of Kikyo's billowing sleeves to a slender hand. A nearly complete jewel lay in her palm. Kagome gently lowered Shippo to the ground, all the while staring at the clay woman. Her eyes slipped over Kikyo's barren face, and Kagome could almost _see_ the woman's soul rotting beneath her frozen features. Pain swam in Kikyo's eyes. Kagome pitied her for feeling the emotion, before wondering what there was to Kikyo _besides_ pain. The woman was empty, save for her tragic past. There was no future for the dead. Kagome picked up the shard and tucked it safely into her pocket. "Thank you."

"What happened out there?" Shippo squawked.

Sesshomaru trailed over to the group and positioned himself at Kagome's side. She opened her mouth to ask why he was wearing Naraku's kimono, but stopped herself from speaking. She didn't want to interrupt. "I transformed and nearly defeated Naraku; unfortunately one of his offspring—the child soul-stealer--nearly killed me. Kikyo appeared and rid us of the creature. She then killed Naraku and extracted the shards."

Inuyasha surveyed his former lover. "So_ you_ killed Naraku."

"I did."

Sango piped up. "Why?"

Kikyo reached out a hand to Inuyasha. It hung suspended in the air; she stared at it as if she didn't know how it came to move. It fell limply to her side. "I decided to aid you in your victory. The human girl needed to live. She is the shard's new protector. I will not let Inuyasha die." she raised her dark eyes to meet Inuyasha's. "You made a vow."

Inuyasha blinked in panic. "What? I mean--"

The lonely priestess stepped closer to the Hanyou. "When the final battle ends, you will come with me to the underworld." Her gaze flickered to Kagome's pocket, sheltering jewel fragments. "The battle is over."

He thought of Kagome, and his heart ached. "No..."

Kikyo reached out to him like a ghost. "You made a vow..."

Sesshomaru peered at his brother critically. "You made a vow."

Inuyasha looked to Kagome for guidance. "Not now." His voice was cracking; she looked so lovely. "Wait—please. Just a month." He thought of all the things he and Kagome could never do. His future family was stolen, held ransom in Kikyo's cold arms. He wanted to kiss Kagome again, and live in that moment forever and ever. Kagome smiled sadly at him. He whispered brokenly, "Just a day."

The earth shook. A sunken circle formed around Kikyo and Inuyasha. Inuyasha saw Kagome's tears, and wanted to collapse under the unfairness of it all. "I love you, Kagome." He was heading down, away from the open sky. He heard a bird twitter, and wished that he had appreciated the sounds more when he had the chance. There were no sparrows in hell. _'But I made a vow...'_ He wondered, for a fleeting second, if his father would be proud that he'd kept his word. He would fall with honour.

Kagome watched tears slip down Inuyasha's cheeks. Pale blue light shone from the ridges of the sinking earth. She didn't want this—she never wanted this. She thought of Inuyasha's destiny: eternity in the cold earth, in the arms of a woman with a vacant heart. Was Kikyo collecting Inuyasha out of duty, or love? Snow crunched under Kagome's shoes as she ran to the edge of the small cliff. Inuyasha's upper body poked out of the earth; he was falling fast. Kikyo didn't do anything but watch the Hanyou suffer. Kagome parted her lips and lied for the last time. "I love you, Inuyasha."

Inuyasha would burrow into that moment—into the joy that spiraled out of his chest—for eternity. He fell to hell with a smile on his lips.

Now, when the hurt feels like it'll split him in two, he thinks of her words. _'I love you.'_ And then it lifts the pain, because the hurt has meaning. He'd lived and suffered, and during that time he was something _important_ to a single, human girl. _He had mattered_. In visions of her, he accepted his fate. Trapped beneath the world, in the arms of a dead miko, the Hanyou finally found peace. _"She loved me."'_

_

* * *

_

A/N-- I've just started a new semester, and I have a ton of math homework every day. I apologize if the next chapter takes a while to produce.


	11. Chapter 11

Kagome spent a long, long time staring at the clean plot of snow before her. _'He's gone…' _She knew that she should feel sad, or angry, or hurt. Only a blank expression crossed her face, and a thud of disbelief landed in her hollow stomach._ 'He is gone.'_ She didn't quite believe it--he was just there a moment ago, within arm's reach. _'Perhaps, if I close my eyes and open them again, he'll be there.'_ But he wasn't, and she couldn't fool herself into thinking he'd ever be back again.

Sesshomaru spoke first. "He died with honour."

Died. The word echoed in Kagome's hollow thoughts. _'Dead, like Kaede.'_ Suddenly she was overcome with a wave of fear so thick that it choked her throat. _'Everyone's dying. The earth is dying.'_ She stumbled away from that horribly normal section of the ground, and felt icy water sting in her damp sneakers. Her skin would sting, and rot, and fall… _'I'm dying.'_

She jumped when a heavy hand fell onto her shoulder and rested there. Sesshomaru pulled the girl close to him, his arm moving to twist around her side. Kagome leaned into the Taiyoukai's warmth. She felt safe from fate when she was near him, because he must live so much longer than death, mustn't he?. She pivoted and, without warning, wrapped both arms around him._ 'Sesshomaru,'_ she thought, _'Will protect me from everything.'_

Miroku swished towards the spot where Inuyasha had vanished, and lightly stroked the flawless snow with his fingers. "We should hold a ceremony."

His words snapped Kagome out of her trance. She turned towards the monk without relinquishing her grip on Sesshomaru. "But there's no body."

Sesshomaru drew his arms away from the girl. He gracefully swooped over to stand beside Miroku. "I will construct a headstone. His empty grave shall be beside our father's."

The statement took the group by surprise. Shippo hung back beside Sango. "But you hate Inuyasha," the kitsune said, staring the Taiyoukai in the eye.

Sesshomaru didn't respond; Kagome spoke for him. "Shippo, Inuyasha died honourably." She didn't know what else to say, so she looked to the Western Lord with a light shrug of her shoulders.

Sesshomaru swallowed his frustration--he should not have to explain his thoughts--and forced himself to address the irritating child. "Inuyasha fulfilled his vow. He proved himself to me."

Sango smiled awkwardly at Sesshomaru. "He really was a good person."

Suddenly a smirk landed on Kagome's face. The situation was so surreal--her friends talking about Inuyasha's death--that she smiled in spite of the emptiness she felt. She pictured everyone as robots: mechanically acting out the symptoms of mourning, though they were all too stunned to see the full picture. "He was a good person," she agreed.

Sesshomaru almost reached across a stoic sea and touched a wave of regret. He saw another being's future cut short while his dragged on, and all the 'I coulds' of the past flew in his mind.

_'I could have saved him_

_I could have accepted him_

_I could have understood him_

I could have loved him.'

Sesshomaru wanted to reach into yesterday and pluck out all the possibilities, so that each one had a future. It was the _not knowing_ that gnawed at him. Another 'what if', another dead life.

But that's all that it was: dead. He scooped up a handful of snow and watched it melt, running in rivulets that fell off of his warm skin. Inuyasha had walked towards his fate; something only the strong can do. Sesshomaru heard the 'drip dripping' of the clear water, and admired the Hanyou. "He was a good brother."

While the group gawked at his words, Kagome reached out and touched Sesshomaru's wrist. She alone saw the regret lining his eyes. She squeezed his palm in support before shyly letting go. "Thank you, Sesshomaru."

Miroku looked at the pair with interest. He saw the shock that had stiffened Kagome's motions, and wanted to comfort her. "When Inuyasha went down, he was smiling. He will find peace, with time."

His words had the opposite effect on the Miko: her blank look fell into an expression of despair. She hung her head down, and stooped her shoulders. Sango and Shippo, confused in regards to her reaction, moved forwards to comfort her despite their own sorrows. Sesshomaru, however, reached her first. He lowered himself to her level, and then pressed a claw beneath her chin. She raised her head to meet his eyes. He spoke so lowly that her friends couldn't make out his words, but Kagome heard every one. "You were right." He said. "Don't feel guilt." He knew what she was crying over.

Tears slipped down Kagome's cheeks. Everyone seemed to be far away, and it was only her, Sesshomaru, and an absent corpse. "But I lied," she whispered. _'He will never learn the truth.'_

"You believe in a God?" he murmered.

She blinked, tear droplets hanging off of her eyelashes. "How can I…." Her throat felt thick as she thought of all the hurt in the world. "When He let this happen?"

Sesshomaru gently steered her away from her companions' prying eyes. They didn't move from their spots; after witnessing Sesshomaru's full power, none of them wished to challenge the Taiyoukai. The pair walked for a while, stopping beside a small, scraggly tree. Sesshomaru resumed the conversation. "What if I said that I believed in my God, and drew strength from their power. Would you argue?"

"No." Kagome thought for a moment that she'd offended him.

He reached out and held her cold wrist. "Why not?" His gaze was bright against the cloudy sky.

Kagome swallowed and straightened her shoulders. "Because He's real to you."

Sesshomaru smiled at her. "And for Inuyasha, your love is as real as the sun and moon."

"But I lied."

He shuffled in impatience. "I _know_ you lied--I am no idiot. But it helped him. What is wrong with that?"

_'Then, maybe, I did the right thing.'_ She smiled at him through the veil of tears. "Thanks."

Sesshomaru allowed the girl to hug him. "You wish to see your friends?"

She thought of all the actions they would go through: shock, depression… anger? She didn't quite remember, but she knew that they would all act sad and grave. They all thought that she meant her words. She didn't want to cry with them, and pretend, pretend, pretend. She wanted to mourn on her own terms. "No." She didn't want to lie anymore.

He didn't question her decision, and Kagome wished that her friends would accept her as much as Sesshomaru did. "You will accompany me, then?"

"To my time?"

"No." He thought of all the suffering he'd seen, and wished that he could spend some time with the happy, simple child he once had. "We are going to see Rin."

"Okay." She didn't question him either. "We have to tell them, though." She started walking back to the group.

* * *

"Why is she with Sesshomaru?" Shippo asked for the millionth time. 

Sango sighed and ignored the kitsune. She watched the pair tread back towards them from across the expanse of bloodstained snow.

Shippo clapped his chubby hands. "Oh! They're coming back!"

Sango inched closer to Miroku. "Why do you think they've gone off?" She asked. "What has he said to her?"

The monk shrugged. "I'm just surprised that he offered his comfort." His robes fluttered as he stepped forwards to greet the couple. "His behavior is… unusual."

Sango struggled to plaster a warm smile onto her face. She had to be strong for Kagome, and push her own sadness behind her. "Quite odd." she agreed.

Shippo sat confused at their feet, and thought that Kagome was lucky to make a new friend. They all tried, unsuccessfully, not to think of Inuyasha.

* * *

Sesshomaru did the talking. "I am visiting an old acquaintance," he said. "Kagome will accompany me." Upon seeing Sango's angry face, he reiterated that "No harm will come to her." 

Miroku tried to reason peacefully. "Can she not stay with us for a few days, Sesshomaru? Surely we'd like to remember Inuyasha together."

Sango tried to threaten. "If you don't let go of her, I'll rip your arm off. Don't laugh at me!"

Shippo tried to understand. "Why are you leaving? Why can't we bring Sesshomaru's friend over here? That way, we could all be together." He was still a child in many ways.

In the end, Kagome had to explain herself after all. "I have to go, you guys."

"Why?"

"Why?"

"Why?"

"Because I made a vow." The group immediately thought of Inuyasha, and how he had walked so bravely into Kikyo's clutches. Those words stopped them in their tracks. "Okay," they said. "Go."

Kagome did.

* * *

A thousand years ago, when Sesshomaru was young, he was once blinded by hope. 

Inutaisho, the great demon lord, was dead.

"We won the war," the courtyards buzzed. "What an admirable fight he put up! The gift of victory, glory, honour…"

Sesshomaru heard the gossip buzzing around his ears like insects. The bitter taste of power stung his mouth as he was lead into his father's private rooms. "Lord Sesshomaru," they called him, as they pulled him to a small storage space. "Great Sesshomaru," they praised, as they cleared aside cobwebs and shuffled amidst dust. "The next Inutaisho!" They proclaimed, as his father's chest creaked open. "For you, my lord."

A sword. The wrong sword. How did his father expect him to run a kingdom with the promise of life? How could a weapon that chases death away possibly frighten enemies? The other sword. He needed the other one.

"Inuyasha, your younger brother--"

"--half brother." He frowned at the dull metal, and wondered if it was even strong enough to kill that irritating adviser.

"He is receiving Tetsusaiga. Your father wished it so."

Dust particles swirled in the dim light as Sesshomaru dropped the sword to the ground. It clattered and echoed in the empty room. The men held their breaths and waited to see what Sesshomaru would say next. "Well. My father's dead, isn't he."

A man--Sesshomaru couldn't recall his name--scurried to kneel before him. "Sesshomaru-sama, your father explicitly stated that he wished this sword to go to you. We would not make such a grave error."

The new lord knew that the panel of advisers and politicians certainly wouldn't mix up such a simple message. Anger bubbled in his chest--anger about the war, anger about his responsibilities, anger about his parents' deaths. He was abandoned.

A burst of inspiration broke through Sesshomaru's cloudy wall of troubled thoughts. _'Father is dead, and I have the sword, and I have the power over life itself…'_ Sesshomaru ran, past the stunned demons crowded around fluttering dust. He ran through bustling corridors and into the courtyard.

The grave sat there, ornate and expensive, beneath heaps flowers rotting in the hot summer wind. He stood before the headstone, held his breath, and drew the sword. _'This is my purpose.'_ He weighed the cold metal in his palms._ 'This was his plan.'_ He tightened his grip._ 'I will not take part in any wars. I will not become king.'_ Reigning during the battle, in his father's absence, had revealed to him how unpleasant his duties were. A smile brightened his adolescent features. The sun glinted gold off of the twisting metal. Sesshomaru raised the sword high above his head, pointing it towards the billowing sky. _'I will see father again.'_ He cut the pungent air with a one clean, metallic swipe.

For one moment, all of his joy and relief and hope boiled over into a solid laugh. It was the happiest moment of his life.

And then the sword was silent at his feet, and the grave sat still in the sunlight. He wasn't sure how long it would take, nor what would happen, so he stood there on the mound of dry earth. The moon and sun traded places in the sky; a week passed before one of his father's old friends persuaded Sesshomaru to retire to his rooms.

The new Lord of the Western Lands left the useless weapon atop his father's body and walked away. He vowed, as he exited the courtyards, that he'd never laugh again.

It just wasn't worth it.

* * *

"I don't suppose you could have used your sword." 

Sesshomaru laid the rabbit's carcass out on a flat rock. Kagome tried not to look at her 'dinner.' "I don't suppose you could have used the jewel?" He retorted sharply.

Kagome frowned at him; it was unusual for Sesshomaru to resort to avoidance tactics. She thought that this was the first time he hadn't given her a full answer. She halfheartedly tossed another twig onto the fire. _'What is he hiding?'_

Sesshomaru's navy blue kimono faded into the gray-tinged evening sky. He started to skin the rabbit; Kagome looked away. "Why does this disgust you?"

The sound of the animal being butchered made her want to gag. "Because it's dead."

He shrugged and strung the animal up on a branch, allowing its blood to drain away. "Kikyo was dead. You did not vomit in her presence."

Kikyo. Kagome felt like crying all over again.

"Don't cry."

Kagome wondered how he detected her feelings so easily, and why he cared.

"It smells unpleasant."

The girl rolled her eyes and tried to come up with a witty comeback. None sprung to mind, so she stared into the flames and tried to lose her troubles. It worked for a few minutes; she was getting better at meditating. See, if she thought about not thinking about something, she was thinking and therefore not meditating. So she tried not to not think about anything; nothing but the flames casting shifting shadows against tree trunks.

"If the hare were carrying a disease, you wouldn't be aware of it. Do humans stuff all of their foods into their mouths without inspecting it?" He snapped a branch off of a tree and, in one swift motion, speared a thick section or rabbit meat with it. "It seems silly to me. If you're going to eat it, what's wrong with preparing it?" He offered the stick to Kagome.

She eyed the bloody hunk of flesh in disgust. "Why can't _you_ cook it?"

He narrowed his eyes. "I can." Her thrust the hunk of rabbit into the center of the fire.

Kagome jumped up. "No! You'll burn it!"

It was too late; the meat was a blackening ball of flame. Sesshomaru sighed and put it out onto the snow. "I don't cook food," was all that he said. He squinted at the damp pile of charcoal and leathery rabbit bits. "Is it edible?"

"No." Kagome swallowed her disgust and managed to wrestle a sizeable amount of meat onto a straight branch. Proudly, she held it beside the blaze. Leaping shoots of flame shone shades of gold over Sesshomaru's features. She thought that he was like snow: cold and calm, sucking up whatever colours are thrown upon it. Only snow melted, and Sesshomaru would reflect up the world's light forever.

"Did you ever love him?" Sesshomaru asked out of the blue. He was beside her, seated on the bare ground.

Kagome edged a bit closer to him. She was secretly glad that Sesshomaru would dare to ask these questions about Inuyasha. He was an outlet--her private emotional sponge. "I loved him as a friend." She felt hollow as she talked, but she wanted that empty feeling out into the air, away from her heart. "Yeah, I love him a lot." Her stick wavered over the fire.

"Loved." Sesshomaru corrected.

"No." Kagome looked the Taiyoukai in his eyes, and smiled sadly. "If he can cherish my love, then I can love him. Even though he's gone." A chord of sadness struck a note in her empty chest, and she welcomed the feeling. It was something to latch on to and deal with. She was sad--she was normal. She would heal. "He's gone." The words seemed more real the second time around. "And I will never forget him, as long as I live."

Sesshomaru averted his eyes and changed the subject. "What will you wish for?"

Kagome felt the jewel roll around in her pocket like a pebble. "I don't know." She thought of Kaede's words: _"Hold on to it, Kagome."_ "I'll think about it for a while." She withdrew her stick and laid it against a log. The rabbit meat cooled in the evening air. "What would you wish for, if you had to?"

"I would like…" He thought of his father, and the person he never really knew. He thought of Inuyasha: the brother he'd given up. He remembered Rin, and all of the smiles he'd missed over the years. Would it be easier to never know them? Would it be harder to live without them? Would it be worth it, giving them up? "I'd like to start again."

Kagome didn't really know what he meant. "Do you mean, you'd wish you were younger?"

Sesshomaru watched her frail body turn to him, awaiting his response. The firelight flickered in her eyes, and he thought that humans were so full of answerless questions that they burned themselves out looking for invisible truths. "Nevermind." He handed her a lukewarm section of juicy meat. She gave it a troubled look. "Eat it. You will become malnourished."

Kagome swallowed a chunk; it wasn't bad. "Thank you, Sesshomaru." He deliberately didn't look at her mouth--he didn't find half-digested rabbit appealing. "Thanks for the food, I mean. I didn't know how hungry I was."

The fire was dying out. Sesshomaru watched the flames spit and hiss, shrinking into glowing coals. The sun had set by the time Kagome finished her meal. "I suppose we're traveling through the night?" She said.

"You may sleep, if you wish." He was standing before her. "May I pick you up?"

"Sure." They took off into the sky.

She snuggled into his robes--they smelled faintly of Naraku, planting an uneasy feeling in her stomach. "Those clothes," she mumbled, "You won't keep wearing them, will you?"

"Of course not. I will obtain another pair as soon as the opportunity presents itself."

Kagome shivered as the cold wind pummeled her body. "When will we get to where Rin is?"

Sesshomaru drifted through fog. Even the moon was barely visible, swaddled up in layers of gray whisps. He wrapped his arms a little tighter around Kagome. "Morning." He pictured the little girl he'd never let himself love, and his speed increased. He saw her face, untouched by time, waiting for him exactly where he'd left her. Hope grew, from a small note to a raging symphony of joy. _'She will have waited for me.'_ The clouds caressed his smile. "By the time the sun rises, we will be there."

He could only hope that reality matched his vision of the future. And hope he did, as he flew beneath the moon, with a human girl in his arms. He hoped for the first time in hundreds upon hundreds of years. He thought that even if Rin were nothing like he imagined, the feeling of joy was worth it. It had been so long since he'd given himself something to look forward to; for the future's embedded in the past, and he'd always cut away any link to what _had been_.

_'It is worth it.' _Sesshomaru's deep laugh faded into the night.

* * *

A/N-- So what do you think aboot this story? Too obscure? Too obvious? Not enough action? Not enough character developement? Comments/compliments welcome! 


	12. Chapter 12

* * *

A/N: Alright, I messed up on the math. Big time. Let's just say that, when Sesshomaru gave up rin, she was twelve, _not _eight. Okay? 

Good. The quote below is by Lenoard Cohen. Let the chapter begin!

-

-

* * *

"There's a crack, a crack in everything 

That's how the light gets in."

* * *

Once, when Sesshomaru was a small child, his father was in pain. 

Not physical pain. He was in his wife's room, kneeling by the bedside. Sesshomaru's mother was sleeping--she slept often those days--so he didn't know _why_ his father was just sitting there, beside her still body.

"Father?" His small voice looked for reassurance. Everything, from the expression in Inutaisho's eyes to the angle of his lips, unsettled Sesshomaru. The lines of the demon's body were off; it was as if some invisible force weighed down on his limbs and twisted his face into an mask of anguish.

Sesshomaru stumbled towards his parent. "Father?" It was wrong, so wrong, to see his parent sad. Adults weren't supposed to cry. "What's the matter?"

Inutaisho looked at his little son, standing straight-backed like a soldier in his nightclothes. Moonlight flowed into the child's face, which was clouded with curiosity and a touch of fear. The boy walked over to him and laid a small hand on his shoulder. "What's wrong." His voice was demanding, commanding the authority that would be thrust upon him in years to come.

Inutaisho heard his wife's shallow breathing. Her breath smelt of illness: some vague, dark force ravaging her body. His son was looking at him with sharp eyes. A trickle of pride fluttered in Inutaisho's chest; Sesshomaru, one day, would make a fine lord. But for now, he was far too young. "Nothing," he said.

The quiet boy frowned and persisted. "You're sad."

Inutaisho smiled at his son. "Sometimes, Sesshomaru, sadness can be a good thing."

The child narrowed his eyes. "How?"

Inutaisho felt the illness slowly, slowly creeping into his wife's organs. "Because, when you suffer…" He thought of her face, sweaty and pained as she struggled to live. "You know, Sesshomaru, what life is." His wife was dying by his side. "Life is suffering, my son. You'll see when you're older." He plucked the boy off of the floor and stood up, his child cradled in his arms. "And once you realize that, you can grow from the hurt."

The boy yawned and tried to process his father's words. "What's that mean? I don't like pain…" His eyes fluttered shut; soon her was asleep.

Inutaisho carried Sesshomaru to his bedroom. His son still fit in his arms; he would regret the day when it was Sesshomaru feeling this ache, and his son was no longer _his_. '_I suffer…'_ He thought of his son's future, and wanted to see it more than anything else in the world._ 'For you.'_

For a second, with his child pressed against his heart, Inutaisho felt a rise of joy so sharp that he wanted to cry. _'I suffer; therefore, I'm alive.'_ His father's pain receded like a warm tide, as love shone in the darkness.

* * *

Sesshomaru stood before the simple wooden door, gathering his courage. The small house, set between fields and a tiny village, smelt of Rin._ 'Isn't it odd that after someone if gone, it takes years for their scent to fade from your memory?' _She'd moved from where he dropped her off--consequently, it'd taken longer than anticipated to locate her. The late afternoon skies cast golden hues across the meadows and snow, bathing the cabin in the sun's glow. He knocked on the door. An eternity seemed to pass before it swung open. 

'Beautiful' never came to his mind, although Rin was certainly lovely at that moment. She was smiling in excitement, breathless from her jog to the door. Rays of warm sunlight splashed against her face; they illuminated her smooth skin and small white teeth. Upon seeing him, her lips--fuller than he remembered--twisted into an 'o' and she stood, stunned in the doorway. His first thought was: _'Different.'_

Her half pony-tail, her little checkered dress, and her boundless energy were gone. "Sesshomaru-sama." Her voice was lower. She took in the demon who, at one point, had been her entire world. With a light laugh she flew towards him and snared him in a hug. Her sore feet left bare footprints in the snow._ 'He came back.'_

A bit in shock, he wrapped his arms around her. He held her like he had for the last time, those short years ago. She simply didn't _fit_ in his embrace the way she used to; one glance at her stomach revealed why. His arms dropped to his side as he frowned at the woman before him. "You're pregnant." His heart pounded nervously, and for a second he thought that maybe he was at the wrong house. His Rin had a child's body, a child's voice, and a child's face. _His_ Rin was frozen in time.

The woman nodded vigorously and smiled. It was then she noticed Kagome fidgeting awkwardly behind Sesshomaru. She swallowed and blinked in confusion. He couldn't have replaced her that fast, could he? Her stomach fell to her knees as questions rose fresh in her mind. _'What was I to him?'_

"Hello!" Kagome smiled warmly at Rin. "My name is Kagome. I'm Sesshomaru's guide. Do you remember me from way back when?" She accompanied her words with friendly gestures and an open, attentive expression.

Rin immediately felt more comfortable around her. "Maybe. You were Inuyasha's friend, right?" Kagome nodded vigorously. Rin continued. "You offered me candy once, I think." She hopped inside the house, a surprisingly energetic action for such a pregnant woman. "Please, come inside."

A few awkward minutes later they were seated in the kitchen, hot beverages before them. Kagome thought that adding tea to any situation helped dispel unease. _'Kikyo's corpse, you look upset. Here, have some tea.' _She suppressed a snicker at her silent morbid joke.

In an attempt to get her mind off the hanyou she inspected Rin's home with wide eyes. The house, though small, was comfortable. The morning breeze swayed the heavy boughs of trees outside. Distant wind chimes clinked in the absence of conversation.

Sesshomaru sat stiff and cold, his eyes betraying his curiosity over the pregnant woman before him. The woman in question was torn between laughing and crying, so she bit her lip and stared out the window. _'Sesshomaru's here,'_ she thought again and again. She was still unsure as of how to react around her savior, her lost companion, her old life. Should she pretend nothing had happened? Should she scold him for leaving her? Should she leap, sobbing, into his arms? What do you say to the past when it knocks on your door amidst the winter wind?

Kagome shattered the silence. "Nice place you got here, Rin."

Sesshomaru pushed down the urge to bolt out of the room.

"Yeah." Rin focused on Kagome, intensely aware that the western lord was fidgeting in her peripheral vision. "Hiroshi built it himself, after the wedding." She smiled and loosened her grip on a ceramic mug. "We've been married nearly a year, now."

Kagome set her cup down and jutted her arm across Sesshomaru's lap. She leaned over him in order to pat Rin's stomach. The demon frowned and tried to sip his drink, while Kagome cooed beneath his chin. What _was_ that girl babbling?

"Aw! Its going to be so cute. Hewo, wittle baby!" Kagome's arm snapped back across his line of vision as she flopped down into her seat. "So, what are you going to name him?"

Rin giggled and patted her stomach. "We don't know. Maybe Masako, if it's a girl." She snapped her mouth shut and blushed, sneaking a peak at the taiyoukai's face. "And if it's a boy, I wanted to name him Sesshomaru."

The demon was genuinely startled. He composed himself before speaking. "That would be…" _His Rin had a baby; his Rin wasn't his Rin._ "An honour." He saw her smile at his words. He heard her laugh with Kagome. He watched her voice rise with happiness over the most mundane things. Relief poured over him: s_he was still Rin._ The stranger's costume fell away as he spent time with her, absorbed in shallow chit-chat. Her soul--as vibrant and childish as always--shone through her motions and words. His companion was still in there, buried beneath layers of time.

"And once…" Kagome laughed.

"Did you know that..." Rin giggled.

The two women got along fabulously, their bright personalities bubbling on top of one another. Rin had spent the last few weeks at home alone during the day, deemed 'too pregnant to work.' She was desperate for social interaction.

Sesshomaru was mostly silent throughout their exchanges, chipping in occasionally to throw in a sarcastic comment or grin at an amusing phrase. The women's energy wore down as the sunlight lowered through the window. The mood turned somber as night fell, and all three characters sifted through the polite talk in search of something deeper. None of them wanted the visit to be so shallow.

Rin started moving to light the fire, slow and lumbering in with her stomach throwing off her balance. Sesshomaru sparked the flames and returned before she could even stand.

"Thank you." She said loudly and cheerfully. All of a sudden she was overcome with a fear that he's simply walk away again, and this would be that last time she'd see him. She wrung her hands together in nervousness--Rin was always easy to read--and drew in a lungful of air. "Why did you leave me?" Her words escaped in a flood of breath, and afterwards she blinked, as if she couldn't quite believe she'd worked up the courage to speak them.

Sesshomaru knew that she would ask that. As he'd flown to her house, he'd formulated a million answers. Only those answers were for a different Rin, in a different time; those answers weren't for an adult. He decided to tell her the truth. "I didn't want to love you."

That wasn't quite the best answer he could have given. Sometimes, honestly doesn't work. Rin, thoroughly confused and a bit offended, thought that perhaps Sesshomaru had harbored feelings for he that weren't appropriate. She leaned over the table, her legs crossed, and gripped her cold mug. "You mean…" The next moment stood out as the most awkward second in Rin's life. "Romantically?"

"No." Sesshomaru struggled to explain himself--he wasn't used to justifying his actions for humans. "I…" He thought that Rin, in all of her bright, childlike thoughts, wouldn't be able to _understand_ as Kagome had. She was far too happy. "I didn't want to watch you die."

Confusion reign on Rin's face. "But Sesshomaru, I was young. I'm still young. Why do you worry about something that's so far off?"

_'So far off.' _Sesshomaru had taken two steps and already Rin was a world older, with life growing inside of her. He didn't want to visit her again--she was aging so fast. How often did women die in childbirth? He saw her face frowning at him, irritated with his nonsensical answers. "I suppose I was confused at the time." He lied.

Rin shrugged in her carefree way, then smiled brightly at him. "Well, that's in the past, I suppose. I'm sure you didn't have much experience in raising humans, really."

"None."

Rin remembered all the awkward teenage moments compiled over the years. As much as it her to admit, perhaps he'd done the right thing. She liked who she was, so something must have gone right. "Alright." Her burning question died out; the last gaping hole in her past had been filled. "Would you like to be the child's guardian?"

Sesshomaru remembered Rin from years back, when she was young enough to pick dandelions. He would like another child--one to visit, one that didn't fear him. Sesshomaru enjoyed children; they were as naïve as he was cynical, and he found that being in their presence balanced him in some way. "I will be the child's guardian."

Kagome yawned, her eyes half open and glazed over with fatigue. Sesshomaru stood up and inclined his head towards Rin in a gesture of respect. He held her hands and aided her in scrambling to her feet. "Kagome and I will depart, now. Your hospitality has been appreciated."

Rin hugged him, pushing away his mask of formality. "Thanks for coming back, Sesshomaru." She felt a lump in her throat; she would be a mother soon, and her childhood was fleeing out the front door. "Visit often, okay?"

Kagome answered for Sesshomaru. "We will! I'll catch up with you later, Rin!"

The priestess and demon fell out the doorway into the cold blackness of night.

* * *

"What was it like, seeing her again?" Kagome was securely tangled in Sesshomaru's arms. He flew through the night like a white star, towards the well. 

"She was older. I forget how fast humans age."

Kagome burrowed into smooth robes, trying to escape winter's bite. The wind did little to warm her. "Was it hard?"

"Why else would I have avoided her for years?"

"Oh." Kagome's habit of making herself sound stupid was officially starting to irritate her. "You didn't tell her the full truth, really."

"She was content with the lie."

_'Like Inuyasha.'_ Kagome gave her head a mental shake. "So do you wish you had spent all that time with her?"

_'I could have, I should have, I…'_ Sesshomaru didn't want to start digging up the past: let the dead lie. He knew that he did what he did, and there wasn't any point in regretting it. Why dwell on something you're powerless to change? "No."

"No?"

"No, I don't regret leaving her. She is happy now, with her husband and house."

Kagome nestled into the silky fabric bunching around his chest. "Are you happy?" she mumbled.

"On occasion." Perhaps that was why he was so fond of children; simply being alive delighted them. Sesshomaru tried to recapture that feeling of happiness from the previous day. _'Be happy.'_ It didn't really work.

"But joy would get boring after a while, if that was all you felt." Kagome mused.

"Yes, I suppose it would."

Still, Sesshomaru felt as if he were floating on pain from pocket-to-pocket of glee, that odd spark of laughter that lit up his life. Most of the time was spent pushing through hardships in search of that rare moment when you fall on your knees before the world's beauty._ 'Perhaps though, that is normal.'_ He pushed those thoughts into the back of his mind and focused on nothing but the feeling of flight: the air around him, the stars encircling him, and the horizon glimmering like a black sea. He flew through the night, towards morning.


	13. Chapter 13

The lies ate away at her. "How's Inuyasha?" Her mother inquired cheerfully. They were at the dinner table.

Kagome wasn't ready yet; she didn't want to say it out loud to herself, let alone her family. "Fine." _Lie._ Glazed-over chapters were more appealing than reality. Her family _tried_ to handle her problems; still, the strain wasn't something they could ignore forever. Her mom hadn't cracked yet, but Kagome could see splintering...

"How're you?" Souta asked. Metal utensils glinted in and out of the evening's shadows. Their faces: Grandpa, Mama, Souta, and Sesshomaru, were all watching her--judging her. Well, except for Sesshomaru.

She swallowed a sticky ball of rice. "Fine." _Lie._ Souta was so young; she didn't want to bruise him with harsh truths. He'd see, one day…

Her Grandfather pointed his chopsticks at her. "You'd better not be thinking about this demon, Kagome." He frowned at Sesshomaru. "Find a nice, human boy."

"I will." _Lie._ Poor Grandpa, cursed with her as a reckless granddaughter. All of his friends had great-grandchildren. He'd have a heart attack if she told him about Inuyasha. Why worry him? He may as well be happy--he was so old…

Sesshomaru observed, his shoulders straight and pushed back. The table before him was empty; she'd yet to see him eat. His face was blank. Maybe, in some ways, she liked his empty expressions. If he wasn't sad, she wouldn't feel guilty; if he was frightened, she wouldn't worry. She didn't have to change for him, because he never let her know what he wanted. "How if your meal, Kagome?" His low voice carried throughout the room. A simple question--a distraction.

"It's fine." She smiled half-heartedly.

He nodded so imperceptibly that her family didn't notice his movements. He understood the pressure, the responsibility, the weight of everything dragging you down.

He understood her. _'Thank you, Sesshomaru.' _She knew that he hated it when she pretended.

* * *

They were alone in the kitchen. The clock ticked.

"I'm only nineteen." Kagome moaned. She looked down at bits of moss-green leaves swirling in her mug. "It's not fair."

Sesshomaru's eyes gleamed; the rest of his face was hidden in the shadows that fell across his body, catching in the folds of his robes. "What?"

She pouted, secretly basking in the pleasure of being the one who complained. She'd never talked with someone who was willing to devote so much attention towards her. She'd always been the person to soothe everyone else. "Most people my age, they've been off partying the last five years."

His shoulders rose gently, then fell into a shrug. He paused before speaking, his eyes focusing on nothing. It reminded her of Kaede's glazed over look before death. Kagome was hit with a sudden, sick feeling. Those shocks were getting fewer and further between, though; perhaps she was beginning to accept the old woman's demise. He parted his smooth lips and spoke. "I have overestimated you. It is disappointing that you compare, still." His tone carried no emotion.

Her stomach dropped. Shame and anger twisted up her heart; she didn't look up at the youkai. _Compare._ Was that so wrong? Red prickles crept up her neck; she could feel his eyes lingering on her face.

"I am Sesshomaru," he said. "I am content with that."

"Good for you," Kagome mumbled bitterly. She'd wanted sympathy--not a lecture.

The taiyoukai forced himself to stay calm and explain his thoughts. "Aren't you happy with who you are?"

She tried to ignore his words, but they dug through her sullen disposition and burrowed into her thoughts. She didn't really know _who_ she was. She raised her head and tried to label herself._ 'I am my mother's pain, Souta's idol, Grandpa's wishes and Inuyasha's memory. I am Kaede's failed apprentice and Kikyo's successor.'_ She was different things to different people, but who was she at the core?

Sesshomaru shifted in his seat. Slices of faded light were draped along the wall, honey yellow from the setting sun. Sitting with Kagome after dinner had a ring of familiarity to it. He was comfortable, at the table with his tea. Behind the shrine's walls the city's smells were a world away. "What can't you understand about such a simple question?"

He'd never had the best social skills. She rolled her eyes and ignored him.

The taiyoukai tried a different approach. "You are brave, loyal, intelligent, aesthetically pleasing, and strong--mentally, of course." He leaned towards her. A smooth bundle of hair slid over his shoulder and swayed, brushing the table. It looked like golden threads, all woven together perfectly in the sun's beams. "I am happy with who you are, Kagome." He didn't smile; he just continued staring at her, as if he were trying to psychically transmit his message. If _he_ were content with her, shouldn't she be content with herself? He wasn't known to have low standards.

A lopsided grin formed on Kagome's startled face. "Thanks."

"It was not a compliment. I was merely stating facts."

"Okay." She continued smiling. "Yes, I like myself."

The demon leaned further towards her. Although his elbows rested on the table, his back remained straight. "I've seen pain a thousand times. My past has not been pleasant." A small smile grazed his lips. "Nonetheless, my choices have made me who I am. I can not pick and choose events I like or dislike. They have all produced I, Sesshomaru. And for that, I do not regret." His smile faded when he focused back on her face. "I do not _compare_ either."

Kagome nodded, her irritation dribbling away. "Thank you." He'd been trying to help her the whole time. She suddenly stilled and cocked her head to the side. "Did you say I was 'aesthetically pleasing'?"

He recoiled and stiffened, his eyes widening by a hair. He raised his chin in a dignified manner. "When did I say that?"

"Just now."

"Now?"

She rolled her eyes. "Yes, _now_. Ten seconds ago."

He responded in his usual way: silence. His gaze wandered around the room, avoiding Kagome at any cost.

"You think I'm hot." Her self pity was forgotten--teasing the demon was too much fun! She was flattered that Sesshomaru, taiyoukai and lord of the western lands, most powerful demon on earth, found _her_ attractive.

"It does not matter." He looked at the wall behind her head, his eyes reflecting nothing.

Kagome leaned forwards, chin in held up by her hands, and batted dark eyelashes up at him. "So, what _do _you like about me?" Her lashes continued fluttering absurdly fast. He thought that they looked like moths glued to her eyelids. "My big brown eyes?" She tried to smile seductively, failing when a giggle burst through her lips.

His indifferent shrug was followed by a long silence, thick with Kagome's quiet amusement. The clock ticked. Finally, his eyes rose and focused on her; they were narrowed confrontationally. Instead of climbing towards anger, though, naked honesty was wrapped in his smooth tones. "I like your hands."

"My hands?" She unfurled her fingers and glanced down at her palms. They seemed like normal, slightly wrinkled hands to her, pale due to winter's early arrival. "What can you possibly find attractive in _hands?_"

"Your fingers are always restless, groping for air or flailing in emotion." He twisted his wrists over and stared down at his own palm, smooth and sculpted. Her little lines and quirks were far more interesting. "They suit you."

Kagome's heart quickened. "Thanks." She bit her lip and twisted her head to the side, stealing a look at him out of the corner of her eye. "I like your skin." A lightness spread over her body; she felt airy, floating on her flirtatious comment.

He quirked an eyebrow; otherwise, he displayed no sign of having heard her. She tried not to stumble in embarrassment. "It's smooth--well, smoother than mine." She flushed, but pressed on. "And it reminds me of the snow."

This time he spoke. "The snow?"

Her heart hammered; she could feel it beating in her hot ears. "Yeah, when it's speckled with blood." She swallowed and licked her dry lips. "I know that doesn't sound too great, but it just comes to mind. The snow is cold and clean, and the blood is hot and dangerous, and they both overlap to form this oddly beautiful picture… I don't know." She focused on the tabletop, and hoped she hadn't made an idiot out of herself.

Looking at the girl before him, a swell of affection overcame Sesshomaru. "Thank you."

Their eyes met, across the cold sea of age and time. She was smiling.

* * *

"I had a father, once." It was late: the moon was towering over the windowsill, leaking silvery light over the curtains. The family was asleep. Kagome and Sesshomaru were in the living room.

He said nothing in response to Kagome's statement. He was sitting on the small couch, with it's back pressed against the wallpaper and an armrest pointed towards stars beyond the windowpane. When she didn't continue speaking, he edged closer to her in order to show his interest.

She continued. "He's dead. I was seven." Her body suddenly felt warm and damp, stretched along the larger couch. Her head lay on a cushion; from her point of view she could see Sesshomaru's torso swim in shadows. She'd told this story many times over the years--_ "Where's your father, Kagome?" _they all eventually asked. Only Sesshomaru hadn't, and for that she felt compelled to give him an explanation. "It's common, really." Her face flushed. She always felt nervous, for some reason, when she talked about this. "He was driving to visit his brother, when another car sped through a red light and hit him. And that was it."

"You miss him?" The demon asked.

Kagome watched the stars flicker, light struggling to burn bright in a black ocean. "I don't remember much of him." She didn't feel guilty about saying that in front of Sesshomaru.

His voice caressed her in the darkness, cool and soothing. "I remember my father in moments that aren't relevant. Scenes have stayed with me: rain in the courtyard, an embrace beside a river, his hand near to mine. I do not remember much either."

"It's weird, how perception is like that." She took pleasure in being open with Sesshomaru. She didn't know why she afforded him with so much trust; it just seemed _right_. "It's not like I have a line of memories; they're more like little moments, all piled together out of order. Do you know what I mean?"

"Yes."

"And I was a kid when he died. Sometimes I feel like I never got a chance to know him. As a person, you know? Not just a parent."

Sesshomaru thought of all the great things people said of his father: the most powerful, wise, and cunning ruler. Sesshomaru couldn't link together the legends and memories. At times he wondered if he'd been given just a few more years, would he find truth inside the tales? "I did not know my father either."

A burning lump grew in her throat. She didn't normally get so emotional about her dad; perhaps it was because she was with someone else who understood it all. "It sucks." Her voice was thick and foreign to her ears. "I can't even miss him if I didn't know him."

Sesshomaru leaned back against the padded chesterfield. "You can miss what you never had. Absence hurts--knowing something should be there, but it's not."

Images of a red haori flickered before her eyes. Inuyasha still weighed heavy in her heart. "Yeah. It hurts a lot. " The clock continued ticking. Kagome missed the hissing of cicadas, and the cricket's song amidst high grass. She'd never liked winter.

_'Father is dead; yet his memory lives, and I must carry that burden.'_ Sesshomaru recalled all the snapshots in time that were so meaningless alone, but put together they formed a child's view of a parent. He thought that if his father were alive, he would be less than half of what people said he was. And_ if _he were alive, that would be enough. Sesshomaru missed his presence, his footsteps, his smell. He mourned with someone else, for the first time.

Sesshomaru thought that even though it only took a second for someone to die, their death seemed to last forever. Memories don't fade with a body.

* * *

Kagome fell asleep there, her body spread overtop rough cushions. Her reluctance to leave Sesshomaru alone had driven her to stay awake as long as possible. Unfortunately, willpower couldn't compete with biology--the girl was out cold.

Sesshomaru was a white statue in the dark, his luminous eyes staring steadily at Kagome's tired body. He wasn't filled with an urge to run away over the mountains; rather, he was content to sit at the girl's side and watch her sleep. Her chest rose and fell jerkily with her deep breaths, and her hands were little fists near her head. She looked too frail when she slept, Sesshomaru thought.

He wasn't blind to the bond growing between them. There were only humans in this era, and he didn't wish to be alone forever. He didn't want let to fear hold him back. Still, that warning: _'If I know her, she will dissapear' _blinked in his head. He would research once the sun rose--he would find out what happened to his race. Kagome made a pathetic noise in her sleep, and her fists tightened. Sesshomaru stayed by her side, all night long. She was too fragile to be left alone.

* * *

A/N--Okay, three words: No. Microsoft. Word.

This chapter was a pain in the ass to work through. I apologize if I have any spelling mistakes--if I do, feel free to point them out. I'd rather have one person mail and tell me then a hundred people noting it but not saying anything.

Three more words: Math unit test. I'm not a mathematical person at all. Wish me luck--the next installment may take a while.

Thank you to anyone who takes the time to review/comment on the story thus far. Thanks for reading!


	14. Chapter 14

"Dance me to your beauty with a burning violin

Dance me through the panic 'til I'm gathered safely in

Lift me like an olive branch and be my homeward dove

Dance me to the end of love"

* * *

She dreamt of an ocean.

It was black--so black that she wasn't sure where the water ended and the night sky began. All she knew was that she was swimming. The water was cold; she couldn't feel it, but she knew that it was icy. She was drowning.

She wasn't scared, though. Not knowing in which direction she drifted, she let the weight of the water press her down. She was falling slowly, her limbs flapping weakly. She sensed that she would soon touch upon ground. Below her feet was a dark void that seemed to stretch forever, but she knew that there was sand far below, so she let herself sink.

She thought that once she got to the bottom, she'd find her house. It would be on it's hill under the water, with a path surrounded by leafy trees, swaying in ocean currents. The wetness would drain away and the world will be cleansed. It was like Noah's Ark, only she hadn't built a ship.

Something light appeared in the black. White threads wove around her, brushing against her numb skin. But they weren't threads--they were hairs, spiraling around her body like a dry blanket. A face materialized before her: Sesshomaru. He opened his mouth, but it wasn't his tone that flowed out of his cold lips. "Fate's mistake will be erased." Kaede's voice said.

She sensed that the water had something to do with the words winding around her, but she wasn't sure. Sesshomaru grabbed her wrist and started pulling her away from the sea floor. He carried her upwards, towards the sky that had suddenly sprouted a hundred tiny stars. Sesshomaru burst through the surface and floated up like an angel. Kagome followed him, rising out of water.

* * *

Sunlight met her eyes. A wave of confusion flooded her; she was in the lake, following Sesshomaru. Why, then, was she warm and dry? She focused her gaze and blinked a few times. _'It was a dream,'_ she thought as her mind cleared. She felt off-balance, waking up on the couch. With a small groan she pushed herself away from the abyss of sleep and sat cross-legged on the pillows. The room was filled with dawn's red light. She felt displaced; she was never in the living room so early, and it seemed like a different place entirely.

"What did you dream of?" Sesshomaru was perched on the small couch. She wondered if he'd moved at all during he night.

Kaede's premonition echoed in her head. "I don't remember most of it." Her voice was throaty and uneven; the fog of sleep had yet to totally clear. "I was swimming in an ocean. You were there, but you had Kaede's voice. She said her last words, and then I woke up."

The demon inclined his head; the morning light brushed rosy hues over his skin, the colours intensifying to a sharp crimson when his face fell into a patch of deep light. "What were her last words?"

Kagome shrugged languidly, wishing that she could sink back into slumber and avoid responsibility. "I think she was ill." Kagome didn't want to recall the old miko's death again out loud, let alone five minutes after waking up. The truth was that Kagome wasn't entirely sure about Kaede's state of mind. Her mind flickered to the jewel shard, tucked away in a desk drawer.

Sesshomaru didn't relent. "What were her last words?"

"You will unite them. Fate's mistake will be erased."

"Well," he said flatly. "That's cryptic."

Kagome shrugged. "Do you believe in fate?" In the back of her mind she noted that it was far, far too early to be discussing this.

Sesshomaru stood, his blue robes shifting to a deep purple in the sunbeams. "I'm not sure. Lately, events have led me to question my beliefs." He turned to walk away, but stilled with his back to Kagome, his hair swaying back and forth. "Perhaps even fate can have 'what ifs'." Without waiting for a response he strolled into the kitchen.

She frowned; why would he stay with her all night, then suddenly leave?

Sesshomaru seemed to anticipate her line of thought. "I am preparing you a meal." She heard the fridge door crack open. "Dress and groom yourself. We will be visiting the library again today." His smooth footsteps paced across the room. She heard and egg crack.

Remembering his experience with the rabbit, Kagome smiled to herself. "Are you sure you'll be okay in there?"

"Go bathe and defecate," was his response.

A blush stained Kagome's cheeks as she giggled, half-embarrassed and not sure whether or not he was serious. She stood up and looked out the window. The city glowed before her in the rising sun. She watched the clouds bulge and ripple, gliding over the streets. Happiness rose in her chest. The morning was truly beautiful.

* * *

"Why is it that raw meat disgusts you, yet hot chicken embryos do not?"

Kagome froze, a forkful of fluffy egg hovering near her mouth. Sesshomaru's breakfast had turned out well. Okay, so the eggs were a little burnt, and the orange juice was lukewarm, but on the whole it was preferable to an apple. She had been enjoying her meal; that was, until the taiyoukai had to go and say something completely unappetizing.

He was watching her, oblivious to the rudeness of his words. Silence swelled as he waited for a response.

The fork clattered against her plate. Eggs quivered, abandoned on the cold platter. For a second, she felt sorry for them. Sesshomaru was looking at her analytically. She scowled at him. "Never use the words 'chicken embryo' when someone's eating. Clear?"

"Is that not what they are?"

She shook her head. He was truly hopeless sometimes. She scraped her dishes, then rinsed them hurriedly with water. She wanted to leave before her family awoke; she felt like being alone. Well, she was with Sesshomaru, but he was so quiet that he didn't really count. Unless you were eating. "Are you ready to leave?" She asked enthusiastically.

"Yes."

"Alright!" She scuffled to the foyer and wormed into a heavy winter jacket. She opened the door; a blast of cool air slammed into her face. "Are you sure you don't want a coat?" She asked.

He pushed ahead of her, marching through the snow barefoot in a thin silk kimono. "I am fine."

Puffing and waddling over to him, Kagome envied his grace. She felt a hundred pounds heavier as she shuffled in her coat. There was less snow than the day before; half of it had disintegrated into gay mush, lining the sidewalks. Her breath rose into the crisp morning air. The sky was a pale blue, and the sun was a small white ball, rising over the clouds.

She turned her eyes over to the demon coasting ahead of her, still wearing Naraku's robes. His human outfit would have torn to shreds when he transformed in battle. Afterwards, he must have stolen the kimono from Naraku's corpse. Kagome fought down a shiver when she remembered touching the slinky material. "Can we get you some more clothes today?"

"I will not protest."

"Good." They walked into the city.

* * *

An hour and a half later they were in the nonfiction section. Sesshomaru was pouring over book after book. A small mountain of encyclopedias and historical accounts grew at his side. He frowned at a page, closed the volume, and with a tired sigh placed another before him. "I assume none of my records survived into this era."

"Probably not." Kagome slouched over the tabletop next to him. When they first arrived at the library she'd attacked books with vigour; twenty minutes later she was anxious and bored. She groaned, stretching her arms across the table, her cheek flat on the wood. Her feet bounced impatiently against the carpet.

Sesshomaru continued flipping page after page. He was wearing a loose sweatshirt and jeans that ended four inches above his ankles. She'd given up forcing style upon him and let him pick out his own clothes. He'd simply plucked the nearest articles off of a shelf, saying that the fabrics felt comfortable.

The demon stilled; the sound of pages turning was notably absent.

"You find something?" She sat up straight and inched her chair beside his. She could only see rows and rows of numbers printed on the paper. His hands were trembling. "What is it?"

"The demons are dead."

She leaned into him, sticking her head closer to the pages. They smelt of old wood. "How do you know?"

"Deforestation rates climbed. There were suddenly more boys born than girls in the population, which dropped. Six years later, the ratio of males to females started evening out. Crop production was at an all time high and life expectancy rose significantly." He took in a deep breath. "There was a war."

Kagome frowned skeptically. "I've never heard of a war at that time, and I've spent days researching this. Are you absolutely sure?"

"The signs are all there." He laid the book down, his eyes never straying from the numbers.

She picked up the thick, hardcover volume and turned to the cover. The title was 'Japanese Statistics: 1500-1750'. "Why do less trees mean a war? Couldn't humans just be advancing--building new homes and such?"

"Youkai live in the forest."

"So? You think a _war_ that wiped out all the demons?"

"Precisely."

She knit her eyebrows together, crossing her arms and leaning back to survey him. "I think we should research this more. Maybe there was a small battle I missed…"

Sesshomaru nodded, opening a fresh book. "This was no small battle."

* * *

Five hours later, they had found two first-hand accounts of the war and a brief mention of it in a thick book.

The first account was a letter, reprinted in a series about everyday life in feudal Japan. It read, "Etsuo has not yet returned. I fear the battle will drag on forever. In the meantime, they've burnt our crops and ransacked out supplies. Luckily I've managed to shelter winter's food from the raids." There was no date, but it was estimated it to have been written in the early sixteen-hundreds.

The second was peice of evidence was of a diary entry, buried in a novel about growing up through the ages. "… Moma said that I can fight one I'm fifteen, but we're losing men fast--I may have to start training in a month."

The third read: "Although evidence is limited, it indicates that warfare took place near present-day Tokyo. Only a minority of historians believe that the war in the early sixteen hundreds lasted over a year; it is widely regarded as a series of inconsequential battles among the lower classes."

Kagome looked down at her hands clasped together in her lap. She rubbed her fingers over her knuckles and bit her lip. "I can't believe I missed that."

Sesshomaru didn't respond. They were still seated at the table, surrounded by bare shelves. The demons had skimmed through every history book the library had. He was staring through the window, lit up blindingly by a late afternoon sun.

Kagome's stomach rumbled. Sesshomaru stood up, regal even in a baggy gray shirt. "We'll get some food for you."

She scrambled up with a groan. Her joints felt rusted in place. Looking at Sesshomaru's stoic features, she felt the need to reach across his barrier of emptiness and touch him. 'Where are all the demons?' Pity swelled in her heart, and she wondered if he would have been better wandering around the earth, not knowing what had happened.

But you have to know what something is before you can accept it, and perhaps sorting through heartache was better than wandering in limbo. She wriggled her hand into his, standing so close to him that his sweatshirt touched her stomach. "I'm sorry about the war, Sesshomaru. Maybe it didn't wipe out the demons." Her last sentence seemed tacked-on and cheap to her ears, so she stated again: "I'm sorry."

Sesshomaru, in his loneliness, latched on to Kagome. He watched her eyes sadden in sympathy and thought that, even though the demons had died, Kagome was still here. He bent down and stared her in the eye. She was his anchor, pulling him out of a barren sky into a sea of _life_. He wrapped his arms around her and pressed her body close to his; he could hear her heart racing in her chest. His clawed hands rubbed up and down her back in smooth, steady motions. "Thank you," he murmured.

He never wanted to let her go.

* * *

"Inuyasha's dead."

Forks froze in their paths, suspended in the tense air before half-open mouths.

"Kikyo dragged him to hell. Maybe he's still alive, technically."

Her mother responded first, flying out of her chair to embrace Kagome. "I'm sorry," she said. Her daughter returned the embrace with heavy arms.

Souta wasn't crying; he sat and stared down at his dinner, his eyes dull. Inuyasha, his hero, was dead. Another crack fractured his children's world, still bright with colours and wonder. It would shatter soon.

Her grandfather frowned, and didn't know what to say.

Sesshomaru had his hand on her knee, resting lightly on her jeans underneath the table. He looked away, as if to afford her time to break the news to her family. He gave her a light squeeze every once and a while in silent support.

Sympathy switched to awkwardness after her mother fell back into her seat and the family started picking at their uneaten food. A question burned in the air: 'How can we help?'

Kagome didn't think anyone could really do anything to ease the hurt; she'd simply have to wade through. "I'm okay," she said convincingly. Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes. "And it's really for the best, you know?"

"I'm so sorry's" rang around the kitchen. Kagome itched, suddenly, with the urge to leave the room and sit by herself. She hadn't expected that she'd feel so detached while telling her family; only a small thread of sadness pulled down on her stomach. She didn't even cry.

* * *

It was midnight.

The clock ticked throughout the silent house, the air heavy with a serious sadness. Kagome and Sesshomaru sat on the large couch, side-by side facing the black air beyond the window. She stared ahead, with a stiff spine and empty eyes. "I miss him," she said.

Sesshomaru held her hand, caressing her palm with his fingers. The predictable back-and-forth motions against her skin were executed without thought. He disliked seeing her upset. "_I _missed him entirely," he replied with a wry smile.

Kagome let forth a peal of laughter, slouching towards Sesshomaru's body. Guilt slammed into her a second afterwards; she should be mourning, not laughing. She straightened her back and continued looking past the curtains.

"Happiness isn't wrong." Sesshomaru examined her profile, wishing that she'd turn and face him. "Inuyasha would have wanted you to laugh."

Her lip trembled; for a second he thought she would chuckle at his words. Instead, she fell against him, her back touching the cushions and her head in his lap. She looked up at his face with wide, watery eyes, and gave him a half-smile. Then she started crying.

He sat stiffly, while she hid her face in the folds of his sweatshirt and bawled. She edged up; a few seconds later her knees were folded underneath her and her torso was next to his. He could feel tears and saliva dampen his shirt. She cried and cried, until her harsh sobs broke into irregular gasps. Eventually she was half-sitting in his lap, her face turned to the wall with tears still slithering down her puffy cheeks. She felt drained; all she wanted to do was fall down and sleep forever.

Sesshomaru held her hand. "That," he said, "Is not unusual. You are mourning." He'd seen enough death in his life to recognize all of the families' bizarre reactions.

"I'm sorry," she whispered meekly. She sniffled and hiccupped a few times. Little gasps still escaped when she breathed, and her whole body felt heavy and weak at the same time. Her eyes stung, so she closed them and leaned her head against Sesshomaru's chest.

"There is no need for apologies," he replied, but she was already fast asleep.

He noticed, then, that his hand was holding hers.

* * *

A/N--Hey! Did well on my math test. It's my happy-news-of-the-week. A few things:

1. This story isn't over!

2. Have you ever heard the phrase, 'the willful suspension of disbelief'? Basically, I'm aware that the whole war-near-Tokyo thing isn't true.

and the quote above is from a song, 'Dance me to the end of Love', by Leonard Cohen.

As always, comments/compliments are welcome.


	15. Chapter 15

"Dance me to the children who are asking to be born

Dance me through the curtains that our kisses have outworn

Raise a tent of shelter now, though every thread is torn

Dance me to the end of love"

* * *

It was too foggy to see the sunrise, so Sesshomaru watched Kagome sleep.

Her small body rose and fell with her dreams. She was lying across the couch, her hair spilling over his lap. Heavy breaths fell out of her slightly parted lips and brushed over his knee.

She was beautiful, he thought. He still didn't know why; his logical mind took notice of her flaws: a crooked tooth, a wrinkle there, a split end. But they weren't flaws--they were her.

The _other_ feeling though--not the sexual one; the thick pull at his chest when she looked at him--_that_ was the feeling that worried him. It was the same feeling that struck him when he remembered his father, and to a lesser extent, his mother.

Attachment.

He was becoming close to her. He no longer saw her as 'human' in his head: she was Kagome. That fact alone should have set off alarm bells. It didn't though; he was content to lay beside her, her hand still in his. Their relationship was growing, and he did nothing to change that. He was fuller when he was near her, as if sadness and joy were suddenly a hundred times brighter.

The intensity scared him.

* * *

Kagome woke up, sweaty and dribbling spit over Sesshomaru's jeans. She had had a nightmare.

The air was humid and cool; it soothed her flushed skin. The muffled pitter-patter of rain enveloped the house like a soft blanket. She tried to remember her nightmare, but all that she could recall was that she had been running away from something.

"Breakfast," was all that Sesshomaru said as he slid out from under her and walked into the kitchen. Kagome yawned and rubbed her eyes, missing his warmth.

* * *

He made rice for her, as well as a pile of yogurt plopped into a small bowl. Kagome lurched into her chair and dug into the odd combination. "Thanks," she mumbled, her mouth stuffed full of food.

Sesshomaru nodded slightly. He was across from her, with his hand folded together and his shoulders straight. He looked at the wet air past the window, drifting in between cold branches jutting out of the valley. "It will rain until nightfall," he said.

"Probably."

The cloudy sky shone gray light over Sesshomaru's serious face, sliding over his cold eyes and pale skin. Noise came from the upper floor of the house; the family was awakening.

"I've always liked rain," Sesshomaru stated.

Kagome turned her eyes to the sky. A few skinny drops of water were already whittling through the fog to splatter against the windowpane. "Why?"

He didn't answer; he simply shook his head very slowly. His hair as bland as the clouds, and his eyes were sad.

Kagome steered away from the dead-end conversation. "What do you want to do today?"

The drops of water swerved down the glass in jerky lines. The valley and trees were distorted: the entire scene wavered and shifted like a mirage. "I don't want to leave the house."

She smiled and leaned back into her chair. The plates before her were nearly empty. "A rainy day, huh?" Truth be told, she didn't feel like venturing out either. It would be nice to have a day to just rest and play around.

"Yes." His eyes never left the glass.

* * *

In the morning, they entertained Souta. His mother had given in to his persistent demands and let him skip half a school day to be with his sister. After the news of Inuyasha's death they were all rattled; she figured that routine could fall behind fun, for once.

"So how many people have you killed?" Souta was bouncing up and down beside Sesshomaru, who was reclining on the couch with a bored expression.

"Many." The taiyoukai said. A playful spark ignited in his eyes.

"How many?" The child was trembling with excitement. Kagome watched the scene with amusement from her seat on the carpet, near the curtains.

Sesshomaru moved so suddenly that her hair fluttered. Before she could stand up Sesshomaru had Souta by the ankles and was holding him a few feet off the ground. The boy stared at the floor bug-eyed, a wide grin on his face.

"Once," Sesshomaru said, "I captured the demon who killed my father." The boy flew up into the air, his thin limbs flailing, and landed safely on a couch cushion. "When I first saw him," Sesshomaru continued, "I snuck up to him." The demon disappeared from the room. Kagome was on her feet, searching the corners and alcoves for him. She played along with a happy expression.

Suddenly a blur raced through the air and stopped behind the back up the couch. Souta scrambled up and tried to launch himself at the demon; Sesshomaru sidestepped his attack, catching the boy before he hit the ground. "He was so surprised…" Souta's feet dangled inches above the floor. Sesshomaru lifted him towards the ceiling. "That he nearly died."

Souta let out a squeal as the arms supporting him suddenly vanished. The boy plummeted towards the hard floor, only to land atop soft cushions. He rolled off the fabric onto the wood and marveled at how fast the demon managed to rearrange the living room.

"First--" Sesshomaru was directly behind Souta's back. "I blinded him." Gently and quickly, the Taiyoukai secured a piece of cloth around the boy's eyes. Souta sucked in a breath.

"Next, I put him in a cave." Souta was maneuvered onto the couch, then swiftly buried beneath blankets.

"Lastly, I disappeared." The taiyoukai flew out of the room. He stopped to stand in the doorway to the kitchen. "He never did find his way out."

Souta laughed; he enjoyed roughhousing with someone once and a while. He wriggled underneath the blankets, eventually managing to untangle himself and pull off his blindfold. He looked at Sesshomaru, still and serious in the doorway to the kitchen. A cheeky grin lit up the boy's face as admiration flickered in his eyes.

That was how Kagome learned that Sesshomaru liked children and stories.

* * *

In the afternoon, they played chess.

Kagome taught it to him as the games progressed. He caught on quickly; it mirrored shogi, in many ways. They sat on the floor in the center of the living room. Water slid down the large window, and the rhythmic sounds of steady rainfall sounded against the house's wooden walls.

Sesshomaru was brooding over his next move, cross-legged with his head held high. Kagome was lying in her stomach with her chin in her hands. She watched him think. Chess was something she was patient at. Her father used to play it with her when she was young--she hadn't dug up the game for years.

His face revealed nothing as he slid a piece over a few squares. He surveyed the board, then sat up straight and watched Kagome's mouth raise into a smug smile. "Check mate." She plunked a player down on a black square.

Sesshomaru frowned, piecing together her string of moves. She'd beaten him with an elaborate trap--surprise brightened his eyes. "Congratulations," he murmured.

A light blush spread across her cheeks. She wiped the board clean; wooden pieces scattered everywhere. "You up for another game?"

That was how Sesshomaru learned that Kagome was a graceful winner.

* * *

In the evening, they remembered.

Kagome giggled to herself as she laid vegetables onto the counter. They'd volunteered to cook supper again. "Once when I was young I stole a toy from a store." She plunked the pot onto the stove and switched on the element. The world was darkening already; the sun, a dim circle high in the sky, had completely disappeared from sight. Sesshomaru watched her go through the motions of flipping on and off the tap. She had an absent look on her face, as if she were looking at something beyond the dismal scenery.

"I was so scared that I'd get arrested. I walked back to the store late at night to return it. It was only a little plastic figurine; it fit into the palm of my hand." She held onto the rim of the sink and straightened her arms, lowering her hear to look at the floor. Her wavy hair shifted with her movements; Sesshomaru wanted, to run his fingers through it.

"Anyway, I got lost on my way there. Luckily a stranger found me and brought me to the police station. I waited for half an hour as they contacted my parents. I didn't mind, though, because everyone kept giving me candy." She chuckled at herself. "When my parents picked me up, I couldn't understand why my mom was crying. She told me she slammed her hand in the car door." Kagome rinsed her hands in the sink. She hadn't included onion in her inventory of vegetables. "Funny how physical pain is so much more acceptable than emotional."

"Children are strange," Sesshomaru commented. He stood up and usurped her place before the cutting board. Kagome seated herself in his warm chair and watched him set to work.

"Don't you remember the weird things you did as a kid?" she asked.

He rolled up his sleeves and rinsed a carrot. She smiled they scene: it was so domestic, so normal that she wanted to hug him. "Once I learned to walk, I would to follow my father. I had a stick that I'd crudely sharpened, and I pretended that it was my sword. I'd imagine that my father was leading me into battle, and every time we entered a room I'd have to search it for enemy soldiers." He smiled wistfully and raised his head. "It irritated him so much that he took my stick and snapped it over his knee. I cried for three days. Apparently, he found my wails more annoying than my games; eventually he gave me a wooden sword in hopes of quieting me. I threw it away and asked for my stick back."

Kagome laughed. She liked Sesshomaru when he was like this: off guard, relaxed, and content. She felt like it was a side of him only she was privileged to see. "You must have been such a cute boy," she commented.

He diced another carrot into clean, even slices. "I was always skinny," he said. "A picky eater."

"Speaking of which, are you hungry?"

He shook his head. "I do not eat often."

"Oh. Alright."

The rain drizzled around the house and filled up the silence.

Sesshomaru watched his nimble fingers flash in between blades of the knife. "What was school like, for you?"

She adjusted her seat and started talking. He listened, nodding every once and a while. The snow was melting away outside the window, streaming down worn paths to reveal flattened brown grass. The clouds rolled the above scene; Sesshomaru glanced up and watched the night rise every few minutes.

"…Math, because it's all memory and I'm horrible…" Kagome chirped on from her seat in the corner.

That was how they learned that they shared another thing in common: they had been children, once upon a time. They pulled back the curtains of time to reveal happy, sad, and embarrassing memories. Neither of them thought about how natural it seemed.

* * *

At night, they planned.

"I'm going back," he said.

Fear rose in Kagome; she didn't want him to leave her alone, surrounded by people who seemed so unfamiliar with who she was. She nestled closer to him after his statement. They were side-by-side on the large couch, her shoulder overlapping his as she leaned against his side. "The war?" She asked, though she knew that was why.

"Yes."

The rain seemed metallic and harsh as it lit up the gaping silence.

"Do you have to?"

"No." Out of nowhere, he started running his claws through her hair and lightly scratching her scalp. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes. Sesshomaru continued. "But I want to."

"Why?" She whispered throatily. Her back was lined up with his chest; her legs were lying over the length of the couch. One of her arms flopped over the side, swinging back and forth.

Sesshomaru shifted, so that her head rolled against his shoulder. Her torso was on top of his; her forehead was brushing his chin. "I want to know what happened. I want to know if I should change it."

"Change it?"

"Why else would I be here? There must be a reason."

She shrugged lazily. "Maybe. We'll see."

He frowned at the girl braced against him. "I did not say you would come."

"Well_ I_ did."

A moment passed, in which Sesshomaru was intensely aware that her body was very light, very breakable, and very close to his own. A part of him rebelled against the thought of abandoning her in this dirty, plastic world instead of protecting her. It hit him how much he liked the girl; the way she walked, her little sighs, her voice when she was happy. He didn't want to leave her because he liked being around her.

The rain was quieting. He sensed that the clouds would lift, and the fog would dissipate by daybreak. "We will leave in the morning," was all that he said.

Kagome smiled. "Thanks."

That was how he learned that he was falling in love.

* * *

A/N--Again, I am microsoft word-less. If I have any errors, don't hesitate to notify me. Reviews welcome:) 


	16. Chapter 16

"So we struggle and we stagger down the snakes and up the ladder  
to the tower where the blessed hours chime.  
And I swear it happened just like this: a sigh, a cry, a hungry kiss  
the Gates of Love they budged an inch  
I can't say much has happened since  
but closing time."

* * *

A long time ago, Sesshomaru met Inuyasha's mother. 

What struck him, below his father's protective expression and her layers of smooth makeup, was that the woman's hands weren't sculpted and graceful. They were folded and spotted, their texture rough despite expensive creams. She could hide time's toll on her face with thick powders, but her hands revealed everything.

Why take interest in something so temporary?

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Izayoi." Sesshomaru inclined his head in a gesture of respect, all the while watching her fingers folding over themselves in a nervous sweat.

The woman nodded to him. Her long hair shone in rays of spring sunlight; they were in the courtyard, before the day of the wedding. The wind fluttered and pulled at her lovely kimono. The woman met Sesshomaru's eyes; she seemed solemn, as if this were another court proceeding instead of a family matter. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Sesshomaru."

Inutaisho towered above his beautiful wife. He was standing stiffly, his hands straight at his sides and his legs the appropriate width apart. Sesshomaru wondered if his father saw through the gauzy layers of formality and was only pretending to be cold for his fiancée's sake. "You will attend?" he asked, his stare blank as it centered on his son.

"Yes," Sesshomaru responded. Inutaisho's decision to marry a human had lost him respect amongst many nobles. Sesshomaru felt obligated to support his father--even if he couldn't understand his motives.

The grass was soft and green, brushing against their shifting feet. Awkwardness built in the crisp air. The empty courtyard suddenly seemed like a royal prison, fencing in the unfolding and complicated relationships. Izayoi inched closer to her future husband. Her eyes were focused away from Sesshomaru's guarded face.

The adolescent, in all his social grace, ignored the woman and addressed his father with words cloaked in indifference. "You love her?"

Inutaisho felt her stiffen beneath his fingertips. He resented the fact that his son regarded humans as insects, crawling across the land like a dying plague. Although he wasn't so naïve that he believed he could change the boy's views overnight, he hoped that, in time, Sesshomaru would understand him. "I love her," he affirmed.

The young lord nodded as though he understood, though he didn't at all. How could you love the grass dying underneath your feet? With another brief nod to the woman, he walked out of the open courtyard into the cool confines of the castle. He hadn't even thought of asking the human about her feelings.

* * *

Their skin was touching. 

It wasn't an extraordinary occurrence; they'd been within arm's distance since arriving in Tokyo. He steadfastly kept his eyes on the dissipating fog past the curtains and tried not to focus on it.

Their skin was touching.

Her forearm was lying across his, pressing against his bare wrist. It seemed as if all the heat of his body was concentrated onto that one spot. Her shifted away from her; her hand flopped off of his lap, onto a rough pillow. He frowned and tried to clear his scattered thoughts.

Their bodies were close.

With a low growl he stood up and paced over to the window in tightly controlled strides. His hand were fisted as the night's coldness shone through the glass and brushed his face. He thought that he _couldn't_ love her; if he did, he wouldn't stay by her side. He never attached himself to things he liked. Actually, he tried not to attach himself to anything in general.

Her breathing was loud in his ears. For the first time in many days, he wanted to escape from the girl. Love was something he didn't want to confront, nor understand; it never lasted.

With one last glance at Kagome, Sesshomaru slipped through the front door and into the dark.

* * *

The city was a different world at night. 

Sesshomaru walked with barefooted across the damp asphalt. The air was still cool and damp; neon lights and flashy billboards leered at black roads. Cars inched past him, their red lights drifting down the lonely streets. He passed busy squares with loud bars. He walked through silent neighborhoods, the crumbling apartments lit up like square stars. He drifted past abandoned factories and frozen parks. He walked all night, remembering.

He remembered his father, how he used to teach silent lessons with strong actions and strict looks.

He remembered his mother, how she used to hold him with her silk-smooth hands and talk to him in a warm, low voice.

He remembered his brother, how he used to cling to him after Inutaisho died.

He remembered Rin, and how she would smile and pick flowers.

He didn't remember Kagome, though, because she was still with him. Marching out of the human city, he realized that he was dwelling in his rusted pain instead of forging new feelings. Life was memories; he could never avoid that.

He climbed up the hill, a hauntingly beautiful creature glowing in the black breeze. His steps quickened; he was nearing the miko_. 'She's with me now, and that is what matters.'_

In a corner of Sesshomaru's mind, a tendril of regret folded in on itself and faded away to nothing.

* * *

The air was clear by sunrise. He sat beside her. Their hands were touching. Lines of translucent red and gold washed over his elegant face. She stirred and stretched her little fists above her head. With a wide yawn she squinted her eyes open. 

"Breakfast?" Sesshomaru asked. He was looking at her strangely--she'd say sadly, if she didn't know any better. He didn't move right away though; he kept staring at her with a dark expression, his eyes flowing over her features as if he were looking at her for the first time.

"That would be nice," she said with a smile.

He nodded slowly, and his look softened. He stood up and paused for a second before turning around. His vibrant eyes were boring into hers. In a sudden, smooth motion, he lowered his head to hover just above hers. His hair fell like a silver curtain around their faces. She could feel his breath brushing her lips. "You will die," he whispered. His rough voice was reigned in tightly. "And I won't."_ 'But we're living now, and that's all that matters.'_

He kissed her.

Her lips were soft. He gently--almost as if he were afraid she'd fall apart at any moment--brushed his mouth against hers. It was brief; a second later he was standing straight above her, his pupils dilated and his breath quickening. He looked down at her, and seemed surprised at himself. 

He'd kissed her. A human. A dead woman. He'd kissed the snow melting, the grass dying, and the clouds rolling off the edge of the sky. He'd kissed a sad memory.

* * *

She squirmed up; her face was flushed, and her heart was pounding. She looked at him with wide eyes, and thought,_ 'This is where it all changes.' _For the first time in a long while, she didn't think of Inuyasha. _'Do I love you, Sesshomaru?'_

She didn't know if she could handle the answer.

"I…" Her sentence crumbled apart, while she was looking at his forlorn face. He seemed so lost; it was if the earth had changed around him, and he was navigating the labyrinths of a new life. It unsettled her; he was always so sure of himself. "I'd like some toast."

He nodded, his gaze drowning in indecision. Without looking back, he walked into the kitchen.

* * *

She was eating her meal loudly, smacking her lips together in the most unflattering way. Sesshomaru sat across from her, looking again out the window. The sun was almost up. 

"You should say goodbye," he voiced. "To your family."

"Yeah." The response came in between the crunching of toast and slurping of milk.

He waited patiently for her to finish eating. His heartbeat was finally slowing down. The kiss played over and over in his head. Her mouth was hot, and her breath had tasted of green tea and honey. He'd been so sure before touching her, but afterwards reality came crashing down again. _'She is fleeting.'_ But she was so clever and beautiful. _'She is frail.'_ Only he knew how strong she was inside._ 'She will fade.'_ And it had felt so_ right_; he'd been so elated and excited, and he could still feel her mouth against his. He wanted to kiss her again.

* * *

She finished her meal and busied herself with disposing of the dishes. While washing a plate, she heard the telltale sounds of her mother awakening, walking into the washroom and closing the door with a muffled thump. Her heart tightened: she'd have to say goodbye. 

Really, it was the same as all the other times she'd disappeared. Regardless of that, she felt that for some reason this trip warded special attention. She would be traveling with a lonely youkai for a forgotten world, brimming on the brink of war. It seemed, in the events of the past few days, that everything was dying and growing, and Sesshomaru was the only constant in her line of vision.

With her task complete, Kagome felt useless for the first time she could remember. Her life was steeping in memories; she wasn't working towards anything, and because of that she wasn't worth anything. There was no future for her in the modern era: school was over; she'd sacrificed her future for a hanyou that hadn't gone along with her plans. She stilled, her hands coated in soap bubbles as the sunrise illuminated her world. Maybe that was why she followed Sesshomaru. He was as lost as her.

* * *

"I'm leaving, momma." 

Miya stood up from her seat long enough to hug Kagome. "Be safe," she said.

"I will."

Her mother smiled at her. "Should I pack you a lunch?"

"No, momma."

The woman stood before her daughter, her heart fluttering and her hands sweating. She didn't know what to do anymore. "Should I wash your clothes?"

"Sure."

"I'll do that." Miya sat back down before her cold rice. "I'll see you in a while." Her eyes stung.

"Bye."

Kagome walked out of the room. Miya bit her lip, and wondered where her child had gone.

* * *

"I'm leaving, Souta." 

"But you just got here!" He dropped his action figure and ran over to his Kagome. He was as tall as her.

His sister smiled brightly; Souta didn't notice her tired eyes. "I'll come back!"

The boy shrugged awkwardly, a childish grin on his face. "You always do. Will Sesshomaru visit again, too?"

Kagome relaxed in realization that her brother was still a child, and didn't worry the way adults do. She hoped that he would grow up and live the life that'd been stolen away from her. "He'll visit again."

"Cool." He hugged his sister, then picked up his toy again. "Have a good time!"

"Be good, Souta." Kagome walked out the room, and wished that he would stay that age forever.

* * *

"I'm leaving, grandpa." 

"Hm?"

"I said, I'm leaving grandpa!"

The man frowned and looked up from his book. "Not with that demon, I hope."

"No," she lied. "I'm not leaving with him."

"Good." He drew his heavy brows together and tossed her a serious look. "You be careful, now."

"I will."

Content with her answer, he propped up the novel and continued flicking through the pages. Kagome walked out of the room, and thought that she may never see him alive again.

* * *

Kagome was standing outside the well's hut, with the sacred jewel in her pocket and a backpack slung over her shoulder. She lingered at the doorway, unwilling to take that step into the unknown. Shadows and dust swirled in darkness around the well. 

Sesshomaru stood at her side wearing a detached expression. He held two books in his hands: 'Of Mice and Men,' and a large volume of poetry. "It may be many years before the war," he said.

"I know." She was rooted to the ground.

"You may die before it takes place."

"I know." She straightened her shoulders, adjusting her bulky pack. The rising sun warmed her face.

He closed his eyes, tilting his head until rays of morning light brushed his eyelids and cheekbones. "Why are you coming, then?"

Her body felt heavy and hot; she licked her lips and looked at her sneakers. "I don't know what else to do."

He didn't say anything; instead, he moved close to her and pressed his fingertips to her wrist. "Sometimes," he said, "There are no decisions to make; only a path to follow." He remembered the kiss, and his fingertips tingled against her skin.

She his words of support lifted her. She took one last look at her home, sitting on the hill and swimming in her childhood. Then, she grasped onto the youkai beside her and stepped into the dark.

* * *

A/N--Alright, it's official: I. Write. Angst. Poor Sesshomaru is having commitment issues. But hey--they kissed:) 

Compliments/Comments are welcome. If you have any questions I'll answer them.


	17. Chapter 17

"You lose your grip, and then you slip

into the masterpeice..."

* * *

As he sped through the sky, Sesshomaru felt it again. 

It was unexpected; he'd been gliding through the afternoon clouds when it suddenly burst in his chest and curled around his limbs, wrapping his body in warmth and calmness. The yellow backpack shifted over his skin as he dipped down, then spiraled upwards through the blue air. Kagome's hands tightened across his neck. She gasped at the sudden movement and laughed a moment after.

He liked to hear her laugh.

A smile overtook his lips as he raced towards his castle, his eyes on the sun. The feeling washed over him: it was hot and strong, with beauty and heartbreak buzzing in the background.

Sesshomaru tunneled through the afternoon wind and smiled with love. For once, he didn't think about it leaving him--that seemed unimportant, because Kagome was in his arms and he was happy. The future was a million kisses away.

* * *

By nightfall, they were in the courtyard. 

Although she was wearing a large coat, Kagome wished she wasn't so cold. She wondered if she'd still be in the castle once summer arrived.

Sesshomaru's arm was around her waist in a possessive gesture. Their hips were touching. He'd led her by the arm outside, and was standing still, staring at the moon. His face was blank and white, matching the clouds drifting across the dark sky. Slowly, he lowered his head and surveyed the barren courtyard. The moon's glow glinted off of fangs as he said, "This is where my father's gravestone was."

Kagome's dark eyes swept across the smooth field of dead grass. "Where'd it go?"

"I removed it." He paused, and then stepped away from her. "Right there…" He was staring at the cold stretch of ground between them.

Kagome thought of her father's grave, laying in between neatly trimmed plots with plastic flowers. "Don't you miss having a place to remember?"

His words were so quiet that they almost drowned in the night wind. "I don't like to remember."

Scenes of her and Inuyasha streamed before her eyes. Her sadness was less; still, her heart felt heavy and her stomach dropped.

"You're thinking of Inuyasha," he stated. He was at her side again, with his fingertips brushing her wrist.

"Yeah." Her throat was hot and tight.

He held her hand and looked down at her sad face. "I still think of my father," he admitted.

She pressed her side into his; she liked being close to him when they spoke. She thought of the invisible grave beneath their feat, and the empty space in the world where a hanyou _should_ be. "Does it ever get easier?"_ 'Does anything ever fill up the hole?'_

Sesshomaru nodded. "With time. It never goes away, though."

Kagome swallowed her tears. "At least I'll have something to look forward to."

The taiyoukai glanced down at the girl at his side. She was tightening her lips and holding back tears. All of a sudden he marveled that the invincible Inutaisho was dead, and in his courtyard stood a small human. She, in all her frailty, was beside him where his father wasn't. In that moment in time, she was stronger than his father. Perhaps it was a sign that the present is what matters; Kagome was a hundred times more important than his 'what ifs', because she was close enough for him to touch. She was real.

Sesshomaru kissed her again.

* * *

Images of Inuyasha ran rampant through her head, even as his lips touched upon hers. Amid the noise in her head, she heard one sentence screaming above the chaos. _'Inuyasha would have wanted to hear you laugh.'_

For the first time, Kagome kissed back.

* * *

He led her into the castle. They wound through the shaded halls into his bedroom. The fireplace was on and casting dancing shadows on the walls' soft fabrics. His grip on her slipped away as he walked ahead, through the flickering light and to the bedside. The sheet was a clean, pale blue. He laid a hand on it and felt it's smoothness. Then, in slow, gentle motion he sat down and looked at her with bright eyes. 

She could hear her heart beating as she walked through foggy warmth to stand over the bedspread. She wanted him to touch her so badly; yet she was numb with indecision. The fire warmed her back, and she could only stare at Sesshomaru's red-tinged lips. "Do you love me, Sesshomaru?"

The question was small in the large room. "You're insecure," he teased with a sharp grin.

She stood still and waited for a serious answer. The embers crackled loudly. Her lungs felt tight and stiff, her skin tingled, and she was acutely aware of the layers of clothing separating their bodies.

The taiyoukai shifted, all of his power contained in the small movement. He faced her with his shoulders and raised his chin to meet her gaze. His lips were slightly parted, and his response rose up above smooth, warm breaths. "Yes."

She sunk onto the bed and curled into his love.

* * *

A million kisses later, the sun rose and time restarted. 

She woke up; he hadn't slept, but pretended to. When she rose to consciousness she felt his warm arms and soft hair. The sheets were wrinkled and silky. She cracked open her eyes to greet sunlight pouring through the window and washing the room in soft yellows.

He was staring at her in his detached way. "Good morning," he murmured.

"Good morning." She tried not to convey her nervousness; still, he sensed it and instinctually attempted to soothe her.

"Thank you," he said. "For trusting me."

She smiled and bit her lip, before inching close and leaning against his bare skin. "Sesshomaru?"

He said nothing, but she knew that he was listening.

She gathered her courage and pushed through layers of guilt and decaying memories. She swam out of the sea of the past and into her future. "I love you."

His silence was filled with the song of winter birds, perched on the ledges of the empty courtyard beyond the window. A few seconds passed before he nuzzled the nape of her neck, breathing in her human smells. He wanted to lay forever by her side and touch her salty skin as the morning broke. Longing filtered through his mind and into his heart. He floundered for a few moments in fear of the inevitable course time would take, before Kagome moved in his arms and he remembered that she was with him in his bed, enveloped in love and the morning's joy.

Reopening his father's death had awakened in him feelings that life _will_ twist and change. The future was an empty space to be filled--nothing more. Kagome was with him that morning, at that point in time. That was how Sesshomaru learned that _that_ was enough.

* * *

A/N-- my apologies for the chapter's brevity. I've been very busy with schoolwork lately. This is NOT the end!  



	18. Chapter 18

Months passed.

Sometimes, when the air wasn't so cold and the sun was warm, they would walk down the hill and graze the paths of the woods. They hopped over shadows of tree trunks and talked to one another about everything. They both looked forward to spring.

When the harsh winter winds swept across dry fields and screamed harshly at the castle walls, they would sit near the fire. Kagome would lay her head on his lap; he would sit still and straight, absentmindedly running his claws through her hair. He finished the book, and simply said that it was sad.

_'Is all human literature supposed to make you do that?'_

_'What?'_

_'Yearn.'_

She loved his answerless questions.

* * *

By the time the winter faded, Kagome looked older. 

She didn't notice it, of course. She still saw herself as the same she looked at seventeen. But Sesshomaru's keen eyes picked out the subtle narrowing of her face, the shallow shadows of crows-feet, and the maturing line of her jaw.

It scared him, how fast she changed. Eventually, he pointed it out to her.

"I could use the jewel," she'd responded.

He thought of how lively she was, and how bravely she lived despite her approaching death. He thought of how quickly she'd fade, and how slowly he'd peel apart from the inside out. She was so natural and bright and brief, and anything else wouldn't be her.

"No," he said. It was the hardest moment of his life.

He didn't want to sentence her to his fate and chain her to a world that was falling apart at the seams. He couldn't do that to her; he couldn't drag her away from her peace.

Kagome's face fell. She searched his eyes for any sort of explanation, but only found pain hundreds of centuries deep. She sometimes forgot how old he was. "Alright," she agreed.

Sesshomaru wanted to laugh and cry at the same time, but instead he wrapped her in a strong embrace and didn't think about letting her go.

* * *

A cool breeze caressed Kagome's nervous face. She was in his office, leaning against the windowsill. The spring air was fresh and sweet; it tumbled into the room, ruffling the curtains and sliding through her hair. To Sesshomaru, working at his desk, it carried the smells of damp earth and blossoming flowers. The scratching of his quill against parchment filled the silent room. 

Kagome took a deep breath, opened her mouth, and then froze and turned towards the courtyard with a sigh. Her hands were shaking.

The demon finally stopped writing and marched towards the girl. "What is the matter?" He stood behind her, raised one hand and started smoothing her hair with his claws. When she didn't respond immediately, he stopped stroking her hair and pressed a hand against her arm. "You are upset."

Kagome closed her eyes, listening to the wind whisper in the distance. She could feel her heart beating. "I'm pregnant," she admitted. A wave of nausea rolled over her; in her mind _'hanyou_ rang over and over again, twisted into a vulgar thing on Sesshomaru's lips.

The taiyoukai didn't say anything for a few moments. He looked at Kagome; she was biting her lip and staring at the courtyard spread below them. "That is a good thing," he finally said.

Kagome smiled and sunk into Sesshomaru with relief, her back pressed against his chest. "It'll be a hanyou," she stated.

"I know."

"And you're okay with that?"

He grabbed onto her upper arms, swung around, looked her in the eye, and commanded "Follow me." Before she could speak he was halfway across the room. Kagome took one last longing look at the sky before scurrying after him.

* * *

He was standing over his father's grave. Kagome walked up to him, noting that his shoulders were slumped and his head was tilted downwards. She stepped beside him, hands clasped behind her back. The sense that it was a somehow a sacred moment weighed heavily in their silence. Then, a spring bird sang as Sesshomaru lifted his head and said, "I never understood my father." 

Kagome glanced down at the wet earth beneath her feet. "What didn't you understand?"

Sesshomaru turned around and faced her. He was smiling a little; she remembered his playful mood with Souta, and half-hoped for another story. "After my mother died," he started, "My father was sad for a few years. But he'd started mourning when she started dying, and by the time she was gone he was prepared. He was soon ready to fall in love."

Kagome nodded sympathetically. He had never told her of Inuyasha's mother before.

Sesshomaru's eyes met hers. "He never loved my mother like he loved Izayoi." It was the first time he'd ever said _her _name out loud. Not 'human', not 'female', not 'my half-brother's mother'. Izayoi.

"Were you angry at her?" Kagome asked.

"No." Sesshomaru didn't want to admit what he'd felt, although surely Kagome must have known it already. "She wasn't worthy of my anger. She was human: an object, a fading image."

"Okay," Kagome breathed at his side. She wasn't angry. "Continue."

"My father taught me many things, but he always seemed so disappointed in me. I felt that I couldn't live up to his expectations. I never knew what he wanted from me."

Kagome brushed her hand over his, gently feeling his tightly clenched fingers. "What _did _he want from you?"

At that moment Sesshomaru thought that he mirrored his father; he was in the courtyard next to a human he loved, and the world was bursting with life. "He wanted me to learn that whatever you love, it is important. He wanted me to learn that everything's beautiful and meaningful, because _we_ make it so." A surge of happiness rose in Sesshomaru; he squeezed Kagome's hand and felt at peace with everything. "He wished for me to understand _why_ he loved her. And I do."

Sesshomaru wished that he could reach through time and tell his father: _'You were right.'_ Even though he couldn't, he felt a calmness that indicated: 'everything's okay.' For the first time in a long time, Sesshomaru thought of his father without sadness.

He sensed Kagome watching him. They were to have a child—a hanyou. The world was unfolding before his feet; he would raise his child like his father raised him, and teach it all the wonders of the world.

Kagome watched the tension in Sesshomaru's body dissolve as he smiled and raised his face to the endless sky. "I understand my father now," he murmured.

Kaede's words: _"You will unite them. Fate's mistake will be erased,"_ rose to her mind. Sesshomaru and Inutaisho were united at last.

The human and taiyoukai hugged each other in the blossoming air, overtop the grave. Sesshomaru was content: he'd finally found his peace.

* * *

A/N--Sorry for the long delay, there. I know this chapter's short, but it said all that I intended it to. There is ANOTHER chapter left--this isn't the end. Thanks for reading :)  



	19. Chapter 19

With a sigh, Sango plopped a thick branch of dry wood into the hissing fire. She backed away from the spitting flames and sunk onto a log bridging the darkness. With her head in her hands, she closed her eyes and allowed the heat to brush her skin. Worry was tainting her thoughts again. As a warrior, Sango was trained to focus on the future. Complete the mission. Hit the target. Work forwards. Finish the job. But she always found herself lingering behind. Kohaku, then Inuyasha. Fear crept up her spine_. 'Kagome…'_

Miroku's arm was suddenly around her. His robes shimmered in the fire's light as he shifted next to her. Sango averted her eyes from the flames and locked instead onto his clothing. Blue. Calming. Miroku's hand was stroking her shoulder. "Kagome is alive," he stated. His words were so sure that she found herself believing them.

She sensed it a second before they landed: power. In a graceful motion she armed herself with her Katana and braced herself in a battle-stance. Miroku, calm as ever, slowly stood and faced the night.

Sesshomaru drifted through the dark in a flurry of windswept layers of snow-white robes. His steps were heavy and unhurried. His features were bland—bored, even. At his side marched Kagome.

"Sango! Miroku!" the woman yelled. She charged towards them energetically, clumsily side-stepping twigs and fallen branches. Her stomach bulged out ahead of her. Sesshomaru increased his pace to stay by her side.

The monk and demon-slayer bounded towards Kagome. They swaddled her in hugs and pats on the back. "How are you? What happened?"

Kagome, flushed-cheeked and smiling guiltily, bit her lip and looked pointedly at Sesshomaru.

Miroku made the connections first. His eyes widened, flickering with nervousness. In a split second that faded and his jaw was set. He turned to Sesshomaru and squared his shoulders. "Congratulations, Sesshomaru."

The taiyoukai conveyed no surprise. "Thank you."

Sango's mind was reeling. "It'll be a hanyou…" she trailed off, observing Sesshomaru's slight nod.

An awkward silence commenced. Crickets chirped, the moon waned, and a taiyoukai felt oddly nervous under the scrutiny of Kagome's companions. She absentmindedly searched for Sesshomaru's hand in the shadows, and latched onto his fingers. Reassured, she smiled at her friends. "Where's Shippo?"

"Asleep," Sango replied.

"I'll see him in the morning," Kagome said. "I'm so tired anyway; we've been flying here all day."

Miroku nodded. "When is the wedding?" He asked in all seriousness.

Kagome blushed; Sesshomaru stiffened. "A week," they answered in unison.

"Alright," the monk said.

"We'll attend," Sango assured.

That was when Sesshomaru began to see why Kagome valued friendships.

* * *

The tea was boiling. 

Miya pursed her lips and stared out the window.

The tea was boiling.

Reluctantly, she drew herself up and marched wearily to the stove. Her hands and heart felt heavy, even though her chest was so barren she couldn't breathe. Why had she put the tea on? It was late afternoon; Kagome used to drink it, after school. Habit.

Miya flicked off the element and seated herself. These little slips, these little moments—they were reminders. Every day, they poured in._ 'My Kagome could be dead.'_

Sometimes she wished that she could _know _whether or not her daughter was alright. It had been months since she'd last seen her baby. The longest stretch so far.

Miya cradled an empty cup and gazed at the summer-lit landscape out the window. _'She will come back.'_

_

* * *

_

An hour later, Ms. Higurashi was crying.

"Momma, it's okay." Kagome's arms were around her mother's body. They were in the living room: Miya, Kagome, and Sesshomaru.

Ms. Higurashi raised her eyes and looked at her beautiful daughter. Her nose was red, and fresh tears prickled in the corners of her eyes. She tried to compose herself, to be a polite host for her future son-in-law.

Her baby was pregnant. Her baby wasn't a baby anymore... Inexplicably, Miya felt like crying all over again. The sheer relief of seeing her daughter alive and happy was overwhelming.

"Oh, momma…" Kagome held her mother. She noticed, then, how thin Miya was. She saw the wrinkled accumulating beneath her wet eyes, and picked out laugh-lines etching themselves into her skin. It struck her that one day she'd be holding her mother when she was very, very old. 'Kaede': the word rolled and turned inside her head.

She was going to have children of her own, and she would be the one taking care of her mother. Responsibility filled her. "Momma? Would you like some tea?"

* * *

They were in the courtyard again. It wasn't empty, though. 

Bright streamers flapped—obnoxiously, Sesshomaru thought—in the hot summer wind. Kagome insisted on decorating for their wedding. Inside the castle's sun-splashed walls, bright colours and soft carpeting smothered the cold stone interior. Everything was laid out for the wedding; from a homemade cake to a battery-operated CD player. Kagome's family; Shippo, Miroku, and Sango; Miyoga; and Rin, her husband, and her newborn were all scheduled to attend. The castle was waiting to be filled with laughter.

They were standing in front of Inutaisho's grave. A stone had been erected.

"What about the war?" Kagome asked. Her hands were pressing lightly on her stomach. _'What about our baby?'_

Sesshomaru took a long time to respond. He closed his eyes and raised his face to the sun. He could hear bird's song, and the steady beat of Kagome's heart. Below that, the faint murmur of their child's heartbeat strained to reach his ears. He breathed in the honeyed scent of flowers dappling the base of his father's grave, and wondered at how beautiful the world was above all the horror.

His eyes snapped open, glittering as he surveyed his lover. She was so frail and so beautiful. Mindful not to crush the flowers under his feet, he slid over to her side and embraced her. "Inevitably it will come." So soft and warm, in his arms. It would be so easy for her to break. "We can't stop it." Humans are fragile creatures. So brief.

He reached down and brushed her swollen stomach. "But it is not here today. So we won't think of it, and we'll be happy. There is nothing more we can do." She was full of life, the world was warm and clean, and her hair smelled of flowers and dust. Sesshomaru smiled.

Kagome, in all her youth, thought he was only talking about the war.

* * *

"What shall we name him?" 

_His _child was so perfect and warm in his arms: bright eyes and silk-white skin, chubby arms straining towards him.

"Inutaisho."

Kagome smiled.

Sesshomaru bent down, son in his arms, and kissed her on the forehead. _'Thank you, Kagome.'_

The human woman saw love in his eyes, and knew she was home.

* * *

A/N -- well, it's over! I have to say, that was a great learning experience. My heartfelt thanks go out to anyone who's reviewed. I'm so sorry that this took so long to get out; I really have been incredibly busy lately. I hope ya'll have enjoyed :)  
- Birchbud 


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